Why did the McCann's parent's leave the window's and doors open? Because Portugal is a very hot climate, And they expected the place they were staying to be safe as lot's of tourist's stay there throughout the year.

Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

Two drunk drivers got in a car crash They both died

why did Timmy fall off the the slide? he was hit by a plane why was Jimmy laughing? he watched Timmy get hit by the plane

Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

Yo mommas so stupid, she has a slightly below average IQ.

what did the guy say when he lost his sandwich? wheres my sandwich?

Two peanuts were walking down the road. One was assaulted because they were walking in Detroit.

how do you tune a piano, you dont, piano tuners tune a piano, I wasn't talking to you!

Hamsters are a lot like cigarettes. They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

What did the black man say to the white man when the white man was drunk and naked on the roof dancing? Quit fucking around Brad and get off my roof or I'm calling the police because this is the third time this month.

Ernie: "Hey Jim, how many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop?" Jim then breaks down and cries deeply at Ernie's question as the fact that he was born without a tongue continues to slowly tear him apart.

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

How do u get high, meet a leprachaun, and touch a rainbow? U find a leprechaun shoot him, steal his pot, and run up the rainbow silly!

What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

What looks good hanging from trees? Spanish moss.

Q: What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: The pizza does not scream in the oven.

Why didn't Josh go to school? On his way to school, a majestic flying homeless man hit him in the head with a sea cucumber.

What do you call a guy sleeping with little boys? Michael Jackson

Why couldn't the boy watch the DVD about pirates? Because his mother did not understand the importance of putting the disc back in it's case after use, and as a result, has become too damaged for the DVD Player to play.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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