Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

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A: Why did the chicken cross the road? B: Why? A: If I knew I wouldn't be asking you.

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Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

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What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

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So, what happens when Germany attacks France? France proceeds to slaughter the attackers mercilessly, as it was during the Feudal Ages, a time when France was Europe's superpower.

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How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

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A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

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John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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What did the mother say to her son when she saw his report card? I don't know. I wasn't there.

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Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me

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A young baby died.

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My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

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An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

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How hot was the blonde considering she was in Africa for the first time and it was 103 degrees, very

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Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother. Please open the door. Your mother who? You were adopted.

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why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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What did the businessman do to get a promotion? He traded oral sex for his male bosses kind heart...

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Haikus usually make sense, but sometimes they don't refrigerator.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops