q: why won't the asian girl do anything? a: it's pretty hard to move or speak being gagged and tied up in my basement

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What did Timmothy get when he got back from his vacation in a tropical destination? Malaria.

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

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Q: What's worse than burning your tongue on hot chocolate. A: Getting shanked by a homeless man

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Whats blue, fuzzy and has little red dots all over? Beats me...

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If life hands you lemons... Question yourself what just happened because life isn't tangible and has no way of handing you lemons, and even if it did, why lemons?

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Your Mom was so fat he made herself Liposuction Twice

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So this squirrel is walking across the road when a HUGE truck comes and smashes him beneath the tire.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and mentally retarded; you sexist fiend.

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-Knock knok who's there? -Orange Orange who? -Orange you glad im an orange? ...I believe you have confused the noun "Orange" with the conjunction "aren't".

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What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

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Q. What does the kool aid man say when he breaks into a wall A. Ow

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What did one viking say to the other viking? I don't know, it was in Danish

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What does a sock, pillow and a lamp have in common? -they all live underwater expect for the sock, pillow and lamp -Matt

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: I didn't get to ask. He got hit by a car.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your boyfriend's gay

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Did you know that you can drink lava? You can only do it once though.

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What noise did Helen Keller make when she fell out of the window? None. She wasn't aware that she was falling and died immediately upon impact. @rowakaflocka

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car Get in the car

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

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What's black and has ne education? A tire.

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What happened when the president cut the hedge That is a highly improbable solution because he would probably have a body guard do it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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