What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

If people are freaking out about this Kony guy I cant wiat to see the look on their faces when they check in my crawl space.

You know how they say cats have nine lives? They don't.

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

Why did the fat ugly bald Jewish man go to the bank? He needed to take out some cash because he was going out for lunch at a highly recommended restaurant.

How do u kill a gay man? Shoot him in the head

Q. why did the girl fall off the swing? A. Because she had no arms.

What time is it in Florida? Time To Eat The President Of The United States!

What did the hobo get for christmas? Nothing.

What bouriquet got to do open HIS FACEBOOK!

What's upside down? umop apisdn

A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

Why was the black man arrested? He was tried and convicted in a court of law for being an accessory to murder.

why did the chicken cross the road? who cares?

Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? You aren't married to a girlfriend.

what do you get when you cross a bulldog with a shitshu? a puppy.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

I have existed for over 6000 years and around vi0lating people long before you where ever born kid... You do not believe me you say? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: You do not believe me? According to this DNA test... Welcome to papa son/daughter... Its time to make you a man/woman now, and then TIME TO MAKE YOU my BlTCH!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...