Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Light turned green, indicating that it was a safe and appropriate time to cross

How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

yo mamas so ugly.... everyone died. the end.

why wuz 6 afraid of 7 7 had a gun

What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

Ok is 25 really funnier than 24 because i think 8008 or 5318008 are way funnire tahn 24 or 35 just saying

What's green and has wheels? grass... i lied about the wheels

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

What's eighteen inches long, stiff, and makes women scream at night? A twelve inch long penis that is erect, thus adding approximately one half of its flaccid size, and involved in the act of fornication with the female partner of the man whose penis I am describing. (Of course, it is ignorant and juvenile to assume that the man in question is heterosexual. He may be a homosexual, which is perfectly acceptable in these liberal times we live in, or he may in fact be single and not inclined towards a sexual preference of any kind. This is understandable due to the myriad complications of long-term relationships, a result of the infinite differences between the masculine and feminine psyches.)

What did Anne Frank say to the German Officer? Nothing. She had to keep quiet in a cramp attic in order to survive.

Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

If I said you had a beautiful body would you stop asking me if those jeans make you look fat?

what did the first fire hi-grin say to the second fire hi-grin nothing they can talk it what just really awkward.

Yo Mama's so fat that she is at risk for diabetes

I once was told that life is like a box of chocolates, but then realized that it wasn't

what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

how do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? it doesn't matter. she can't climb up a tree with only one arm.

My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

whats worse than failing your maths test?

Where do you go when you find a fork in the road? To the nearest restaurant.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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