A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

Why can Randy Moss Jump so high? Because he trained to jump high.

Why did Austin Bell smell like tuna? He had sea food at Joes Crab Shack

whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

What is red and smells like brown feces? Bloody feces

Safety in numbers? Try telling that too six million Jews.

What is worse than ten dead babies nailed to a tree? The holocaust.

Why Was the student driver using his cell phone in the car? Because he had gotten in a mild accident with a midsized sedan so he was quickly dialing his AAA agent for roadside assistance so he can get back to his loving family and three children

A young Asian boy got a B on his test. He went home an showed his parents even though he was nervous of their reaction. They told him that a B was a good grade and put it on the fridge. After that he began to gradually flunk each class one by one because of his parent's inability to push him to be better. He is now homeless and an alcoholic.

Why did the tomato blush? It didn't, tomatoes are naturally red by colour.

what is the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

Why can a black man beat a white man in basketball? They are generally better at basketball Why cant a black man beat a KKK member in basketball? He valued his life and didnt want to die

Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

A man walks into a police station with a gun... He is there to turn it in, he found it on the side of the road and realized that this situation would best be handled by the proper authorities.

Hey I just met you and this is crazy but here's my chew toy throw it maybe!

A guy wearing a top hat walks into a bar. He says, "Ow."

Why doesn't Jonathan Walk across the road? Because he is in a wheelchair...

What did the boy in the wheelchair get for Christmas? A bicycle.

2 Men Walk Into A Bar, I Forget The Rest.

Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

A boy walked in on his mom and dad in their bedroom last night they were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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