What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 9,405 licks (this may not be reliable I lost count since I kinda just bit it)

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How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

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What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

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whats red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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why wouldn't the man's car work? because it was broken.

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your friend is so gay that he cuts of dicks as his part time job. and enjoys it.

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Hey, is that your corvette. No I thought it was yours.

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What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

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How do you make a clown shut up? Throw a axe at it!!

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What do you call 1000 black men walking down a street? The million man march

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Man goes to doctor, says he's depressed. The world is bleak and hopeless and life just isn't worth living. The doctor thinks for a second then smiles. "Treatment is simple he says, the great clown Pagliacci is in town. Go see him, that should pick you up." The man bursts into tears, sobs hysterically like a child, "But doctor," he says. "I am Pagliacci."

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Boy: Why'd the chicken cross the road Mom: I don't know go ask the chicken

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it doesn't matter, it got turned into KFC before it crossed.

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What did the doctor say to the person who is suffering from obesity? Run fatass Run

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Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

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What is worse than torturing, "forcibly penetrate" and then slowly and painfully kill nine billion people? The Holocaust?

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Roses are red My balls are blue Get off Unless You want too

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he was raped.

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These anti-funny jokes are so funny, i realized that i would like to read another one

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50 gay man and a homophobe are in a nightclub in Florida ...you know how the rest goes.

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The speakers on my computer were broken, so I was going to replace them with John Boehner. Because he is the SPEAKER of the house.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops