HAHAH MY WORD IS HAPPY CLAPPY

Why did Suzie get raped? because she was out past her bedtime. and the morale to this story is that its funny to be raped.

Why was Sally in a wheelchair? Her abusive father beat her repeatedly with a rake.. Then as she crawled out the door to try and get help, the abusive father took his Dodge Ram and ran over her legs reapeatedly. Then began to slap her. Luckily, a vigilante saw the whole thing and slaughtered the father with an axe and carefully escorted Sally to the hospital. After a couple of weeks of beautiful and extraordinary care, Sally made a full recovery and was able to leave.. and all patients have to leave in a wheelchair

A horse walks into a bar. The barman says 'why the long face?'. The horse does not answer as it cannot speak or even understand english. It was later destroyed by the government.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

Roses are red Violets are blue Last but not least, Bananas are yellow.

What did the dog say to the mailman? Woof.

A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

Knock Knock. You don't have a door.

What did George Washington say to Genghis Khan? Nothing they are both dead.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

What is worse than an 11 year old getting raped You getting caught

What's the difference between a park bench and a black man? Nothing. They're both capable of supporting a family of three.

Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

A man walks in to a bar with a frog stapled to his head. The bar tender says What the heck is that. The frog says I don't know this thing has been coming out of my but for two days

How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

i just cant stand up to cripple jokes

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

Why'd the asian man cross the road? I dont know, who cares? Just leave the guy alone

Everytime someone says Jamie on this website, he's referring to Dylan, cause he's to insecure to write jokes about anyone else. Please direct all jokes at Dylan Hodge, 14 years of age, living in Queensland, Australia, come to his house to watch the f a g man, suck his mothers p e n i s.

what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

Yo' Mama is so fat, her driver's license says, "picture continued on other side."

Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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