You know how we have iPods? OJ Simpson strangled his wife.

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What did one rock say to the other rock? Nothing, rocks are inanimate objects, therefore rendering them unable to participate in the activity of speech.

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a black guy and a mexican are in a car, who's driving? a taxi driver.

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Knock knock. Whos there? To get to the other side.

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what is the worst thing in the galaxy? runing out of dr.pepper :(

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How do you check that you are not dreaming, but in actual fact, you are wide awake? Try to bite off our finger (this is actually possible, but the brain does not allow you to do it).

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what did the catholic priest say to the little boy? -probably something about god or jesus because they are in church

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its shoulders.

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Why did the man fall over screaming? Because he got shot in the leg

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How many electricians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? If you need an electrician to screw in a lightbulb, you're a moron.

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what did the clinically depressed man last post on twitter? "Oh cruel world, i finally lost all faith in the good of humanity. I am unloved and irrelevant to all. I know nobody will miss me, but goodbye anyway. #suicide " nobody followed him and saw the post and he died alone with nobody at his funeral.

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What does the time bomb say to the idiot? Nothing, time bombs are inanimate objects and therefore can't speak.

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im jewish

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How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

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knock, knock, TRICK OR TREAT

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For as long as i can remember, i've had memories

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nathan palmer has a big head !

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Q; What's something that's long and girls like to suck? A: A popsicle

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what is patrick wilson? smart

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What do you call a cool pig? SPIDER-PIG!!!

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Why did Ashley run out of juice in her house? Because she drank it all!

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Three black men walk into a store at 2:00 in the morning, what happens next? They buy some snacks and leave.

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What does a baseball and a T-Rex have in common? What? Neither of them is a carrot.

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A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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