a woman asked her husband, why havent you been talking to me? the man answers, you are having an affair so i ignored you and only talked to the girl im cheating on you with. you should know your a horrible person

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Why is one side of a geese formation heading south always longer than the other? It has more geese

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Black people are innocent.

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you know what sucks more than getting raped by a gorilla? getting raped by two gorillas.

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You are the third derivative of the position function.

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Whats big, tall and fat? Most of America.

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how did the dinosaurs die? they got old

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nbjhfghl

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How did Peter Parker tell his uncle that he was Spiderman? He didn't because he was already dead.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Hodor

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Why did sally fall of the swing? She didn't have any arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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what is white and sticky? glue.

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If you have alzeimers, wait, never mind i forget.

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fart

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why are elephants gray? to tell them apart from blueberries.

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there are two hicks named Billy Bob and Joe. Billy Bob decides to go to college so he goes to sign up for classes. The Dean of the school decides to help him out and tells him he will be taking math, writing, and logic. Billy Bob is okay with the math and writing but then asks "what the hell is logic?" The Dean thinks for a moment and then says "Okay for example, do you have a weedwacker?" Billy Bob says "yeah i got a weed wacker" so then Dean says "So that probably means you have a yard." Billy Bob goes "yeah i got a yard" So the Dean says "so if youve got a yard you've probably got a house." Billy Bob goes "hell ya i got a house!" The Dean says "and if youve got a house that probably means you've got a wife." Billy Bob goes "ya! i got a wife" so the Dean says "If you have a wife then that means you are heterosexual" and Billy Bob goes "of course im heterosexual!" So the Dean goes "See Billy Bob, thats logic." Amazed by this, Billy Bob goes back to Joe and starts to tell him about his classes. He explains he will be taking math, writing and logic. Joe is confused so he asked Billy Bob "what the hell is logic!?" Billy Bob thinks for a moment and goes "okay how can i explain this....okay joe, do you have a weed wacker?" and Joe responds "no Billy Bob i dont got a week wacker..." Billy Bob: "I KNEW YOU WAS A HOMOSEXUAL!"

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RATE THIS JOKE THUMBS UP FOR TEN COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES RATE THIS JOKE THUMBS UP FOR TEN COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES COOKIES

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick.

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a banana

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What do you do to a duck with no bill? Please, leave the duck alone, it's bad enough for him having no bill.

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What do a comb and a guitar have in common? Neither of them can climb trees.

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what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? seeing this joke 1000 times on this website

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Why did Michael Jackson like 24 year olds? Because they are apart of humanity and he had no reason to dislike them.

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What's better than winning the Silver Medal at the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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