How many apples does it take to keep the doctor away? 1 if you throw it hard enough! haha

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Hey i just raped you and this is crazy so delete my number and keep the baby

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What is blue and has wheels? Grass- I lied about the colour and the wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

A man walked into a bar.He woke up hours later and went home. By TheRealPaddock

thumb_up thumb_down -28

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

how do you drown a blonde in a kitty pool? put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom

thumb_up thumb_down -28

why was the fat man excercizing? because he was a fatass and no one liked him

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Q: What do you say when you see your T.V. floating at night? A: That's so frickin awesome

thumb_up thumb_down -28

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? It depends on a variety of factors such as the size of your mouth, the amount of saliva, etc.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What do you call a black man flying an airplane? A pilot you racist S.O.B.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

And so he penguin said, The is my most casual outfit!" HAAAW

thumb_up thumb_down -30

what does STFU stand for? the southern tenant farmers union.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

what did the iphone say to the galagy s3? nothing they are phones.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A man walks into a chiropractor. The chiropractor asked whats wrong with you? The man replies My boner has scoliosis.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Whats white, fat, and looks like a horse? An albino horse who apparently has a high chance of diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

1d

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why do you have to write a conclusion at the end of your paper? So people dont have to read the whole thing.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops