What's better than rape? Consensual sex.

Why did the chicken croos the road? It didnt, my father caught him and cooked him for dinner.

an 80 yr old man apllies to walmart

Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

What happened when the boy got sad He fell in a woodchipper

Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

A priest, a rabbi, and a buddhist monk walk into a bar. The bartender says " What are you drinking?"

A horse and a group of people are the jury in a courtroom. They are expected to vote yay or nay of whether a supposed robber is guilty or not. The jury goes into their room. They come out, and the people vote yay. The room turns to the horse. The horse states his objection very thoughtfully, and then leaves the room.

I was not scared, I was disappointed, I was expecting to see you for you, not the whole strange outfit getup, what was the point of that? I know the deal about hypnosis and stuff, did you know it is actually known as monoideoism? But I really cant figure for the life of me how it is physically possible to be under a deep state of trance and completely awake at the same time.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor.

Why did the man lose the a race? 'Cause he has no legs

What's blue, orange, and silver all over? Nothing. That's a ridiculous combination of colors.

whats the difference between a can and a fish?they can both swim. exept for the can.

A man walks into a bar. After recovering, he sues the bar for it's irregular glass doors.

Why was the girl unhappy with her male teacher? Because he gave her a bad grade...and raped her the night before.

When life gives you lemons, refrigerate them so they don't go bad.

where was Billy during the bomb? Every where

Miss Jones has 10 apples on her desk. Billy takes half of them away and runs. What does Miss Jones have? 5 apples and a complaint filed for smacking Billy with a ruler.

What's sad about 3 black people going over a cliff in a Cadillac? Cadillac's seat 6

A boy and his dad are in bed and his dad is telling him a story. And the cow told the farmer to get out of the bar. Now, what did the farmer say? Holy shit a talking cow!

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have alzheimers. Cheese on toast.

9/11 my birthday

How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

What's the difference between a duck? Both legs are of equal length, especially the right.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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