A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

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What did the little boy get for Christmas? Presents.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, horse, we don't serve your kind here." The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse," says the bartender, "I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out. 10 minutes later, the horse returns. "Hey horse, are you deaf? I said we don't serve your kind here!" The horse turns around and walks out, knocking over a stool with his tail.

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What's scarier than a ghost? Practically anything as ghosts aren't real.

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A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

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How does Hitler tie his shoes? with little Nazis!

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Q:what did the 14 year old girl from Tennessee say to her dad when she lost her virginity? A: Get off of me

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Roses are red, and many other colors too.

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Tall asians

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What was little Sarah's last Words to johnny before he got hit by the bus??? Can i have your ice cream.

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If people are freaking out about this Kony guy I cant wiat to see the look on their faces when they check in my crawl space.

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A Mexican and a black man are in a car. Who's driving? The black man, because he was the designated driver for the night and was being helped by his good friend, Paco the Mexican, to quit his alcohol addiction. The AA meetings and rehab clininc were failing and he had lost his job. Jamaal, the black man, is now attending night school and holding down a part-time job at his local Baha Fresh. paco is very proud of him.

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How do you help a one-armed man down from a tree? Wave.

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What did batman say to robin before they got into the batmobile? Get in the batmobile.

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Did you hear the one about the koala bear that fell out of the tree? Yeah it died.

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Wanna hear a joke? Zeke friends Wanna hear a better jokes? Zeke with his friends

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What did God say to Abraham? Nothing, because God doesn't exist.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs. Why did noone help her up? She was fat.

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Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

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i know you talk the talk but can you talk the talk

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why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

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What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why was i sad when 4 black people in a cadillac fell over a cliff. The car blew up...

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What do you call a lot of Chinese people in a confined place? A Chinese urban center.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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