Have you heard about the constipated mathematician? He worked his problems out with a pencil... It was a #2 pencil

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What is the biggest lie in the world? I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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What is Jetlag? When your computer is running too many applications/programs, thus causing the game Jetman on Facebook to lag.

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how do you drown a blonde in a kitty pool? put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom

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Why can't monkeys and kuala bears get along? Because they are two entirely different species that cannot communicate with each other...

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how could you not hav not died of dehyderation?

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sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

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"Knock knock" Come in!

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Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens rights ;) Wanna hear another joke? Too bad i'm not gonna tell you

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, because they weren't made. Cupcakes were made instead. Sorry, Muffins.

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like if your cool

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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what happened to your carpool? they died.

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Why does the man have mayonaise in his pants? A: I don't know, I was hoping you could tell me.

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Are you antijoke.com. Because you are a faggot.

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What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

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Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

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What did little John do when he was bored? He went on Anti-Joke

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Yo mamas so dumb she has to repeat the 10th grade...again.

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

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What is blue and has wheels? Grass- I lied about the colour and the wheels.

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What do you call an overly-sexual, chewbacca-like creature that smokes cocaine and shoots heroin, while beating its offspring? Mom.

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What happens when you finish a bottle of Sprite? You finish it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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