What did Mary say to Vishnikharmut? You're name is weird. What did Vishnikharmut say to Mary? Your grammar is incorrect.

When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

Why can't Hellen Keller watch Spongebob? She doesn't have the proper cable service

knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

Why did Billy kill Joey? Joey had sex with Billy's wife... and Billy wanted revenge.

What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

You wanna hear what's totally out of this world? The moon

Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

Hey, you know what would be funny? A joke.

Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, Retinal Hemorrhage.

Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

What do you call five black me pushing a car? "Very nice young men who helped me when I broke down," according to my grandmother.

What did the chicken do? He crossed the road.

A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

Why did the young girl fall off her bike? Because somebody threw a fridge at her.

Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

Where is Jew University? Berlin, Germany

ADAM SAS IS A GREAT GUY!

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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