What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

What did the black man say to the white man when the white man was drunk and naked on the roof dancing? Quit fucking around Brad and get off my roof or I'm calling the police because this is the third time this month.

What did the Rabbi say when the Priest asked how his family was? The Rabbi breaks into tears as he explains his family was killed in the Holocaust.

What did the three best friends say to eachother? We are all best friends

What do you call a german soldier? A Nazi

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

Why did Susie drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

Why was the little boy sad? Both of his parents died in a tragic car accident.

Why did Hellen Keller drive off of the cliff? Because she is a woman.

"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

Q: Why do Asian children tend to be smarter than other children A: They have longer school years

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

123 f*ck off

Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

two mormons missionaries knock on a door they are welcomed into the home and treated with kindness later the family is baptized. the mormons return home with a sense of accomplishment and purpose.

knock knock? come in

An eleven year old boy walks into a bar... he is searching for his father, who has a known alchol problem, and has been missing for five days.

When an anvil and a feather are dropped off a building the anvil will hit the ground first because it's heavy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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