What's worse than finding your cat dead? Finding your cat dead because it choked on your goldfish.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? To get to the other side.

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What is so sad about 5 black people going over a cliff in a Ferrari? That was my Ferrari by darragh hamilton

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There was once a Polish man who was extremely sad with life because people always made fun of him. He decided to do something about it. He sat down to contemplate the situation, and after a few hours, he thought, "I have never seen anyone making fun of Italians. So, if I start talking and behaving like them, no one will be able to make out that I am Polish and make fun of me." He went into isolation for three months and after a lot of practice, he walked confidently into a shop and said, "I am a very hungry. Give me some pepperoni and zucchini." Immediately, the man behind the counter said "Are you Polish?" This guy was taken aback and he repeated his request. The man behind the counter said, "Are you Polish or not?" This man was finally very ashamed and amazed at the shop owner's discerning ability and so he admitted to the fact after which he asked, "But how did you know?" The shopkeeper replied, "My grandmother was Polish. I could tell by your accent."

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? Because the numerous failed attempts of crossing over the years deemed it almost impossible, therefore, chicken could no longer see the point in life.

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What's worse than a papercut? Dying

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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knock knock, whos there? the bum bum boys ready to dance :) ``~ ``sms

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A kid walks in to a bar. The bartender asks the boy where his parents are and he replies that he does not know. They call the police who proceed to try to contact the boy's parents. They have gone missing so the boy must go up for adoption. He gets adopted by an abusive family and runs away. Without a family, job, or money, he could not afford a house. He lived alone in a box until he died of starvation.

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What's Green and has Wheels? Ian Leighton... I LIED ABOUT THE GREEN

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Why did the baby cross the road? he was taped to the chicken

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what is the difference between lizzy and a momma hippo........ lizzy doesnt bathe.

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So two men were drinking beer and one asks "Why are you so sad today, Lenny?" The other man replies "Because I was just diagnosed leukemia." Four days later Lenny dies and his body was buried at Cherryhill Cemetery where his family mourned over his death.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

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Q: What's the upside to your otherwise miserable life? A: You only got raped twice last week.

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This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

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If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them.

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Why was it sad for black guys drove off a cliff? There two more seats

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What's worse than seeing Helen Keller behind the wheel of a car? Being run over by Helen Keller.

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My mom told me and my brother to lean up on a commercial...we were watching netflix

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has Stevie Wonder.

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Why did the pedophile go to the park? He lost his dog.

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Why didn't the jew spend his paycheck? He wanted to save money for the future

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops