What did the man do with the naked baby girl? He put some clothes on her and proceded to lay her down for a nap.

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

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A naked man walks into a bar and is promptly arrested for indecent exposure.

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Knock Knock. READ THE DAMN SIGN IT SAYS NO SOLICITORS!!! ... yeah.

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Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

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How do you find your way out of the impossible maze? You don't.

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Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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What happened to the gun that was jammed? It didn't shoot.

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What did the woman say to her abusive husband? You're hurting me.

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Roses are red, My name is Dave, This poem makes no sense, Microwave.

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Why did the mouse cross the road? Because he had been attached to the chicken with a nail gun.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I hate rhyming Penis

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How do you stop a black man drowning? Take your foot off his head

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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Roses are red, Violets aren't. This doesn't make sense. Potatoes and brown.

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How does an elephant climb a cliff who cares

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A deaf man walks into a bar. Someone yells, "FIRE!" and everyone evacuates. The deaf man does not hear him and dies horribly.

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Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure

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i know you talk the talk but can you talk the talk

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What's worse than a dead baby? A dumpster full of dead babies What's worse than that? One is still alive at the bottom What's worse than that? It had to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It came back for seconds

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How did the mom quiet her screaming baby? She threw it out the window.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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