A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

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A man walks into a bar with a chicken on his head the bartender asks the man why do you have a chicken on your head the man replies the chicken is thirsty

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Hickory Dickory Dock, Three mice ran up the clock, the clock struck 1, and the other 2 escaped with minor injuries

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What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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Dude man, I'm high...

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It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

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Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

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A man attempts to sign in to PlayStation Network... And succeeds, proceeding to enjoy the console's numerous award winning exclusive titles such as LittleBigPlanet and Uncharted 2, along with utilizing the system's Blu Ray capabilities and playing with his friends online in an absolutely free network, on what many consider to be the superior console to the Xbox 360.

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What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

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Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

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hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

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Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

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Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says "You have to stop masturbating." The man says "What, why?!" The doctor says "So I can examine you."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops