Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

Why was the girl distressed by the photo of her boyfriend's mutilated corpse? Because it was out of focus.

If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

i'm hard

a man walks into a bar, what does he say answer: oww..

Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

Whats funnier than a black man? A black president

What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

Whats luckier than finding a lucky penny? winning the lottery.

What did the amputee get for chritmas? A bicycle

Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

What is a good remedy for the common cold? A piping hot bowl of chicken-noodle soup.

There once was a mam from Peru He dreamed he was eating a shoe It wasn't... It was a goat

WHATS FASTER THAN INTERNET BUSTA RYMES

What did the black man get for christmas? A present.

What the the Tyrannosaurus say to the chicken? Dinosaurs are extinct and even if they were not, it would not say anything to a domestic fowl, it would most likely devour it with one bite.

A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

what happened when 3 had sex with 4? nothing numbers are not capable of sexual intercourse

What is Sally's favorite flavor ice cream? She can't eat ice cream, she's lacktose and tollerant.

What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...