Roses are red Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet But i have commitment issues So I'd rather just be friends at this point in our relationship.

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There is a Asian a black guy and a white guy the black guy loves apples the white guy loves pears and the Asian loves Macaroni the white guy gets a apple the black guy gets a pear and the Asian has no lunch so the black guy kills the white guy for the apple and the Asian kills the black guy because he is hungry

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three mexicans walk into a bar... the bartender says get the fuck out!

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WELCOME TO THE SECRET TOWARDS GOING BEYOND YOUR FIFTH SENSE... UNLOCKING YOUR SIXTH SENSE! (redux:Chronoshift extend Xr`d Utrawave edition) 1, Sound 2. sight 3.touch 4.Smell 5.Taste. 6.Balance? :( 7. Pressure :/ 8. Itch :O 9.Thermoception: Ability to sense heat and cold :S 10.Proprioception: This sense gives you the ability to tell where your body parts are. 11.Coordination. :/ 12. Nociception: In a word, pain. This was once thought to simply be the result of overloading other senses, such as “touch”, but this has been found not to be the case and instead, it is its own unique sensory system. There are three distinct types of pain receptors: cutaneous (skin), somatic (bones and joints), and visceral (body organs). Moral Man the Friendly arsonist, motherpounder: I SHALL GLADLY HELP YOU UNLEASH YOUR 12th SENSE TO ITS FULLEST DEGREE!

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What is the difference between Jesus and jackAwhole lota fat

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? No. Well, neither has he

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what is the difference between lizzy and a momma hippo........ lizzy doesnt bathe.

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what do you call 10 black people in a red car? overcrowded

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What more orange that a lime? Most things.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The guy didn't respond because he was deaf.

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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Why do women have boobs? So you've got something to look at while you talk to them. That's sexist... I'm sorry.

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What did God say to the man who just died? Nothing. God and Heaven something parents make up so kids will do the right thing.

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What do you call someone who's sad? A depressed person

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If a train leaves Chicago at 50 miles per hour, how hard does the baby strapped to the tracks get splattered?

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I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

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How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

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What is big green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree A pool table

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Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

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Why did the mailman die? Because everybody dies.

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knock knock whose there? you have AIDS

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Jack and Jill went up the hill....Just kidding, it was only Jill. Jack had no legs

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A terrorist robs a walrus.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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