What looks good hanging from trees? Spanish moss.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why does big tom run the dock because he knows how to speak to skiiers

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Who's the fastest kid in AA

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats included in over 90% of all car crashes? A Car

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was booted into the air by a screaming Russian osselot.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A blonde walked into a hair salon. She got her hair dyed black, as she is sick and tired of jokes that scrutinize those with blonde hair.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why didn't Josh go to school? On his way to school, a majestic flying homeless man hit him in the head with a sea cucumber.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because its owner was neglecting him and the kitten later died of malnurisment

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

An optimistic person says the glass is half full Pessimistic people say the glass is half empty Engineers say the glass is 2 times the size it needs to be.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops