What's the difference between a grape and a duck? They're both purple, apart from the duck.

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What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

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What's the cure of cancer? Death.

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why did your mom leave your dad because he was a drunk :l

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Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

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What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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Whats worse the losing your 3 kids, your lovely beautiful wife, and your trusty dog, all your belongings and in a house fire while you're at work? Nothing

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What did the Albino get for Christmas? Hair dye.

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Why did Jimy fell down the stairs, because he was adopted.

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Why did the cop pull over the car full of black people? Because, they were going 65 in a 35 mile per hour speed limit zone, Which is against the law.

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If life hands you lemons... Question yourself what just happened because life isn't tangible and has no way of handing you lemons, and even if it did, why lemons?

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Your Mom was so fat he made herself Liposuction Twice

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Phoebe: Joey, it's a birthday party. Joey: Yeah, but for a one year old. What's the point? The other day, she laughed for like an hour at a cup. Just a cup with a picture of Elmo on it dressed as a farmer. And he's standing next to this cow. And the cow says...."Elmoooo!" Joey: *starts to laugh* Yeah...that's a funny cup.

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What would you do if I walked onto your property and started to smash up your mailbox with a sledge hammer? You would be very scared and most probably call the police.

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A horse walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer, the bartender quickly takes out a shot gun and shoots the horse because he is secretly dealing horse meat to tescos

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Why do Asians get 50% off on movies? They don't.

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Little Brianna has a special body part. That's why I kidnapped and sexually assaulted her.

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What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It escaped.

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How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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Immaculate Misconception - Motionless In White \m/

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Q: What's worse than burning your tongue on hot chocolate. A: Getting shanked by a homeless man

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what did the kid with no hair get for christmas? cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops