Yo mamas so fat she hates her life and the example she sets for her children.

why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

Roses are red, Violets are blue, my dick is hard, and it's cumming for you.

Why is the bowler right handed? He has no left hand.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car. -Tag

what happened to the black man that fell of the bridge? he drowned due to the fact the african-americans do not swim very well.

Roses are grey. Violets are a different shade of grey. Let's go chase cars. -Dog

So Bob walked into his house after a long day at work and layed a rope on his bed. A few hours later his wife came home and found a beautiful tire swing in their backyard but her husband shot him self in his throat.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

A blond, a brunet, and a red head jumped off a bridge. Which one hit the ground first? In order to solve this problem you would first need to figure out witch of the three had more of a body mass. Then you would need to calculate the accretion in case one brought along a cow. However, in the end the outcome is always the same: 3 dead bodies on impact and 3 mourning families.

why are black people always so funny because they think of funny jokes

How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

Confucius says... He with whom neither slander that gradually soaks into the mind, nor statements that startle like a wound in the flesh, are successful may be called intelligent indeed.

what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

Have you heard of the dog that sounds like Megan fox? No Oh, well ummm apperantally there's this ummm dog that sounds like Megan fox. So ummm yeah. Pretty interesting stuff

A hipster walks into a bar you've never heard of...

What do you call a blackjack man driving a car? An average citizen.

Romney: I think you would raise our debt and make more Americans jobless. Obama: It's just cuz I'm black!

what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

What's the difference between Rebecca Black and your mom? Nope! Chuck Testa.

Knock Knock Whos there? You You Who? Who You Oh im Jim.

How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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