what did the cat say to the potato? meow

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About numbers, it was 180 mg of valium... And I am going to live becausepeople got there in time, my heart never stopped because luck, the doc was only making a joke about me "having ingested enough valium to die at least twice". Sanders, I just got your girlfriend to agree to a threesome, if my banana ever wakes up again, AND WHEN... Thou areth forgiven, btw I sent him a picture of Line`s unshaved vagina, and a note stating: U recognize this? Find out more on horsehead network! Meh His name is Anders something Chattington, yeah for all that know him, guess whose finger is on her unshaven... Yeah, maybe you should not have messed with a guy that can have ANYONE. Ps: Then its your mother, then your sister which is 17 (and pretty 16 is legal here so fuck you Chatty!) and then I SHALL STRIKE THY WITH THE VENGEANCE OF A THOUSAND SUNS! Because you are forgiven, which I cant even remember what means, I mean I know I am typing my experiences here, but thats only because I remember by muscle memory where the buttons are, said the doctor... I can still play Snes emulators... Not, because my numb fingers cant click anything and Line is gone. I TOUCHED HER ALREADY YA KNO! YOU SAW THE PIC, My skin is tan, and... well you know she is here... The best part? She is totally okay with you knowing, sayonara pal, id watch the "fluor" in your mothers pussy the next time you eat it!

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A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

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- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

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If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

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Only people of high intelligence can laugh at anti jokes.

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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how did superman die? he got cought in a plane engine!

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Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

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What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

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What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

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What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? Boyscouts came back from camp

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Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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your in court a woman police officer says anything you say can and will be held against you. the man replies titty

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A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

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Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

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Seriously, I am going to tell you, but you know, what would you have preferred that it was if you could choose, I am kinda insecure about these things, and people can read these messages so...

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What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

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roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

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noah is a scrub jungle

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a lazy boy sleeps 23/24 hours. what does he do in the remaining hour ? he takes a nap

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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