i just cant stand up to cripple jokes

what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

Everytime someone says Jamie on this website, he's referring to Dylan, cause he's to insecure to write jokes about anyone else. Please direct all jokes at Dylan Hodge, 14 years of age, living in Queensland, Australia, come to his house to watch the f a g man, suck his mothers p e n i s.

Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? Because it was summer and the grass had extensive growth, so much so, that it proceeded to spread to his neighbors yard. His neighbor then called HOA, and thus, the unruly grass was taken care of.

Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally! How did Sally die? She couldn't figure out how to open the fridge

Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

Flowers are colors Love me

An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

What do you call a man with no arms or legs? Names.

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

What is purple pink and goes over 10000 miles per hour. Barnney in a tornado

why did Kanye interrupt Taylor Swift at the VMA's? because he had a little too much scotch before the ceremony

Q. What's the difference between a clock and an elephant? A. A clock doesn't have limbs, muscles or a respiratory system.

You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

i punched my mother in the face once she cried

What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

bite me

Roses are crimson. Violets are purple. I don't understand why this poem is so popular.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...