What did the suicide bomber say to the other suicide bomber? You're da bomb!

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

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Stephen Hawkins walks into a bar...

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Why is the dog in the driver seat? Why is there birds making you filet mignon? Why is your toe blue? I don't know the answer. Go talk to your doctor

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Why was the blonde so stupid? She suffers a severe case of retardation.

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What's grammatically incorrect about this sentence? Nothing. I lied.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

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My daughter's so smart, that instead of texting K, she writes Potassium.

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Guess what? I like trains.

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table has legs.

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Why is six afraid of seven? SE7EN!

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Q: Why did they laugh at the black guy? A: He told a funny joke.

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do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

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What's worse than a baby in a dumpster? A baby in two dumpsters

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what did the jew say when the arab threw rocks at him? He didnt, the israeli air force proceeded to fire white phosphorous missiles and annihalated many small children and babies in the process, the aftermath is still around today.

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a man checks his mypsace

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Why was the boy afraid? Because he had just seen his dog get ran over by a tractor

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Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house... knock knock who's there the chicken

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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Q. What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A. One's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, and the other's a highly trained professional skilled in the art of litigation.

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How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

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a little girl is playing outside of her house when i man in a van approaches her and stops to ask if the girl will help him find his puppy and that he has some gandy. seeing as the girl has a great love for animals she gets in the van. the man and the little girl drive around until they find the puppy. the man is so overjoyed her rewards the girl with candy. he then drives her back to her house and she feels wonderful having helped the man find his puppy. the end.

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops