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patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, your mother has AIDS.

I liked your first album but I feel that it went downhill from there. There are a few good songs on your third album though.

Q. Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? A. Because he had alzheimer's and couldn't remember how to ride a bike.

What do you call an asian plumber? A plumber.

Roses are Red, Violets are blue, most poems rhyme, but this one doesn't.

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

Roses are red, violets are blue, take this medication, and call me if you have any symptoms of nausea or heartburn.

Q. Why didn't the Hero rescue the princess? A. Because he crunched some numbers, realized the incredible odds against him, and decided against it.

So, im new at this site and i was wondering how do you make an anti joke?

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What's more funny than 10 dead babies in the bottom of a trash can? 1 dead baby in the bottom of 10 trash cans...

what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

You still alive? I used to be called proteus by the way, but then you disappeared and Neronism or watever its called now turned insane. I mean we killed you man! Out of mercy, you telling me a jacket changed you and everything? Where have you been? Six million followers? And all the shit that has made "moral man" the most lauded thing on Horsehead is you? Mind helping me make sense out of all of this?

Roses Are Red...Rolo's Are Round....Pull Down Your Pants And Let's Down!

An elephant walked into a pub and ordered a strong Vodka and Coke. "Long day?" asked the barman. "Yeah. Very. So many people stroking my trunk in my apartment - It's meant to be a private place. I'm scared to go back there. One child said they were going to rape me."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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