what do you get when you cross a red snugulo and a blue glurga? your on acid

What color is the orange? Grey, I'm color blind.

Im taking a shit right now.

If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

Mr Mac reminds me that no matter how hard you try you will always lose your hair

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him "why the long face?" "All horses have long faces" he replied.

Knock knock. After 1 and a half minutes of waiting, Phil assumes his friend is not home, and promptly leaves.

Why did the elephant cross the road? To run away from the angry chicken who was mad that he was slacking off work.

Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

why do jews like money? So they can support their family.

Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

What do you call 10 black people swimming down a current? A happy family

Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

Imagine that we take all of the elephants in the world and laid them out end to end in space Did you know all of the elephants would die Nature fact

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

What did the archangel Michael say to Jesus? "Hello, Jesus."

Human: Are you a frayed knot? Frayed knot: I'm afraid so.

Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

Q: Who would win in a fight, Chuck Norris, or a Tank? A: Chuck Norris, because his hidden fist in his chin gives him 3 fists to the tank's 0.

I walked into a Mcdonald's and ordered a Big Mac. I regretted it later.

Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah Witness

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...