The blond detective was searching a crime scene and replied to the police officer, "I smell something fishy about this situation." She was on her period as a matter of fact, and bled all over her trousers.

you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

Why was the man arrested? He assaulted and raped an elderly woman at the local Walmart. He then proceeded to hijack the poor woman's Scooter and lead police on a 4 mile long car chase.

What did the little boy say when he was asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

Yes, I did not begin this alone, but things got complicated, you know who Alex Knight is right?

yo mama so dumb... because she was not properly educated

What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

What do you do to vegetables to make them taste good? Nothing. They are still people, and they can't speak up for themselves.

Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

whats awesome? a blade of grass with a mexican hat and a revolver.

why did the man get arrested? because he was a thief, and thieving is completely unacceptable in a civilised society

Q: What do you call a stop sign in the winter? A: A stop sign in the winter.

A naked man walks into a bar and is promptly arrested for indecent exposure.

Whats the difference........ Between a duck?

Why did the plane crash into the mountain? The Pilot was a tomato

Dear Jim, I have a problem with my Hymen... "Jim'll fix it for you..."

How did Debbie get a black eye? Because her dad asked her to take off her pants and she refused so he beat her

What's worse than a dead baby joke? A dead baby.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. They order a few drinks, chat, and walk out.

how do you make lady gaga cry you poke here face then rape here.

In Soviet Russia you don't drive car, because the Soviet Union was disbanded in 1991

Why didn't Tom have to pay for his ride to the funeral? Because he was dead and in a coffin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...