Guess what? What? Your dog is dead.

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What did the lion say on a hot day in Africa? Nothing, lions can't talk.

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Can Anti-Jokes censor curse-word tenses? Fuck Fucking Fucked Fucks

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Yo mama's chest is so flat that it's because she has stage five breast cancer and had to get both her breasts removed.

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What do you call a black man, an asian man, and a white man walking down the street? 3 men walking down the street.

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What do you call a Black man with a gun ?? A black man with a gun !

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I have a friend named Dave, he lost his ID and now we call mim Dav

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What did the black man say to the white man? Hey, I like your shirt.

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A woman with big boobs walks into a bar and gets raped

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Two peanuts were walking down the street I stepped on them both

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I make it rain on them hoes, By which I mean I masterbate from my third story patio

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How do you kill Justin Beiber? By stabbing him 38 times in the chest.

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Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so therefore i must be a pig

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered SIX offender

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What do you call a person who walks but doesn't run? A power walker What do you call a person who runs but doesn't walk? Someone running to the nearest bathroom holding there crotch.

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A man walks into an exam room for a doctor's appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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why did miles cross the road? Because hes gay

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Why did the teacher fall on her face? She was shot in the back of her head.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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An orphan falls off a cliff.

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You: "Ask me if im an astronaut. " Them: "R u an astronaut?" You: "No. "

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How do you become a superhero? Eat 10 buckets of KFC.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown I should probably water My garden soon.

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Why couldn't Sally celebrate hollaween? Because she's not allowed to take candy from strangers. Also Sally died a week ago in a car crash.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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