What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

What"s pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

Yo momma's so fat, that she got baptised in Sea World.

What's worse than waking up next to an ugly girl? Waking up, sealed in a coffin which is floating on a raft traversing through shark-infested waters. Oh, and the raft is on fire.

"Knock knock" "Who's there?" Not Sally because she has no arms ~Sally jokes

Calling your penis a chose because it's small and fat.

Q. What does the kool aid man say when he breaks into a wall A. Ow

What does it say on the back of Superman`s cape on the "new" movie? My other actor was an awesome dude, all I got now is this asshole... Moral: Christopher Reeve... takes lasers... shotguns, eats lava with his cornflakes... falls of a horse... dies... Moral2: HEY What is the booing for? This is the ANTI JOKE! SECTION... but now to my sincerest thoughts... Moral 3: R.I.P Christohper Reeve, he lived and died with hope... Dying happy while suffering from one of the worst things that can happen to a human being, is an inspiration to us all! True superman!

What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

what happens when an Asian and a Jew get married. They have children.

did you hear the one about the gay child molester?

You know how hitler wasn't accepted into the art school ? The teacher who didn't let him join was Jewish .

Did you hear about the kidnapping in Pennsylvania? He woke up...

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his forehead.

Did you hear the joke about the man and the serial killer? Neither did the man since he was stabbed repeatedly and thrown into the bottom of a lake.

Why was the road crossed by the chicken? Because as an animal, incapable of understanding human languages and consequently lacking in education, it was unable to understand the convention of not using the passive voice in English prose writing.

A teenage girl walks into a bar. She sits down and watches the TV up against the wall. The bartender walks by and says "Hello, do you have I.D." The girl says "No, I'm just here waiting for my ride." The bartender then says "Well I'm sorry to have to tell you this but you gotta be 21 or over to sit in the bar." The girl says "Okay, but is there anywhere I can wait that is safe?" The bartender asks "Why?" and the girl replies "Well, I've been hiding from my ex boyfriend. I just broke up with him an hour ago. He was very controlling and he is still not over me. So now I'm here waiting for my new boyfriend." The bartender says "What you have a new boyfriend already? Maybe that's why your ex was angry." The girl says "yeah, I know, oh look there's my ride. It was nice talking with you, have a good night."

What's the hardest part of walking through a pile of dead babies? My penis.

Phoebe: Joey, it's a birthday party. Joey: Yeah, but for a one year old. What's the point? The other day, she laughed for like an hour at a cup. Just a cup with a picture of Elmo on it dressed as a farmer. And he's standing next to this cow. And the cow says...."Elmoooo!" Joey: *starts to laugh* Yeah...that's a funny cup.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had very recentley made his escape from a nearby farm, of which was owned by a man close to dying of a Rhabdoid Tumor. His family was in mourn.

A Black man, a Latino, and a Midget get into a car. They drive to the county fair, get snow cones and ride the tilt-a-whirl.

Q: Why did Timmy cry? A: You would too if you had your arm cut off

How is an elephant like a grape? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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