What do you call a cat with 1 eye, 4 legs, and its tongue out? Road kill.

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What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

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Jon walked into a bar. Ouch.

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple...

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a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

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What does the Bill in Bill Clinton stand for? Bilious.

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I am going to school I live in Ohio, but I'm at Germany How do I do it? I'm a blonde, nobody knows

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Dam.

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What's harder to pick up, a football or an anvil? It doesn't matter when you lost your fingers in 'nam.

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What do dragonflies do when they are a couple? One sits on the others head, causing the bottom dragonfly to have a loss of vision, and increases the weight on the bottom dragonfly, which increases the chance of both the dragonflies deaths.

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Whats included in over 90% of all car crashes? A Car

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Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

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What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

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An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

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Whats big and blue and white and if it falls from a tree its sure to kill you. A fridge with a denim jacket on.

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What did one lawyer say to the other? We are both lawyers. What did the stupid lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both pineapples.

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Whats worse then a worm in your apple This joke

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What does Chuck Norris order at McDonalds? A Big Mac with a large fry and drink.

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There was a asian jew and a black man standing at a bus stop wht do you call the Freinds

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What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

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what can't see and has four eyes? a blind kid born with four eyes

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Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

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Andi: I have a great knock-knock joke, but you need to start it. Jake: Okay...Knock-knock! Andi: Who's there? Jake: ...

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Why was the clock off? Because it was broken

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops