What starts with f and ends in uck? Firetruck.

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My grandmother just called to tell me she was dying................. to have sex with me.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

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Why did the man cross the road? Because he was applying for a job that's building was located on the other side of the street.

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What's worse than a wet sock? Being molested as a child.

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What long black and tasty? Licorice

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Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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he took my chicken i shoot him in the foot and raped his dog

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your mom. Just kidding, it's the pizza guy. Pizza guy who?

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whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

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they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

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Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

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What's better than winning a million dollars? Winning 2 million dollars!

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how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

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My Nan, that is all.

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What Did The Ocean Say To The Other Ocean? What? Nothing, They Just Waved. Oh. Did You Sea What I Did There? No. I'm Shore You Did.

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you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

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how did superman die? he got cought in a plane engine!

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What's big fat and hairy? Peter

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Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

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- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

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If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

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A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

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About numbers, it was 180 mg of valium... And I am going to live becausepeople got there in time, my heart never stopped because luck, the doc was only making a joke about me "having ingested enough valium to die at least twice". Sanders, I just got your girlfriend to agree to a threesome, if my banana ever wakes up again, AND WHEN... Thou areth forgiven, btw I sent him a picture of Line`s unshaved vagina, and a note stating: U recognize this? Find out more on horsehead network! Meh His name is Anders something Chattington, yeah for all that know him, guess whose finger is on her unshaven... Yeah, maybe you should not have messed with a guy that can have ANYONE. Ps: Then its your mother, then your sister which is 17 (and pretty 16 is legal here so fuck you Chatty!) and then I SHALL STRIKE THY WITH THE VENGEANCE OF A THOUSAND SUNS! Because you are forgiven, which I cant even remember what means, I mean I know I am typing my experiences here, but thats only because I remember by muscle memory where the buttons are, said the doctor... I can still play Snes emulators... Not, because my numb fingers cant click anything and Line is gone. I TOUCHED HER ALREADY YA KNO! YOU SAW THE PIC, My skin is tan, and... well you know she is here... The best part? She is totally okay with you knowing, sayonara pal, id watch the "fluor" in your mothers pussy the next time you eat it!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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