A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

Roes are red, Violets are blue, This poem doesn't rhyme, You're entire family has died. The plane that they were on went down due to a flock of geese getting sucked into the engine. They were visiting you for your twenty fifth birthday and wanted to surprise you. there were no survivors.

Why did Sally fall out of the tree? Because She had no arms or legs... ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Knock-Knock? Who's There? Not Sally

You had ONE job. Unfortunately, it wasn't enough to support your dying wife and ill child.

It's likely that very few people will read this.

Yolo Pierre because of Etzio tickle shits faggatron and individual nut join forces to become the shit suckers

What's worse than being raped? Finding out it was your uncle.

Forward this anti-joke to at least 15 people And absolutely nothing extraordinary will happen in the next 10 minutes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Why did the kid poop his pants? He was a baby

whats the diferrence between a bush and an old lady? it be wierd if a bush had an old lady.

Whats the difference between a boy scout and a jew? A boy scout gets to come home after camp.

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

What's worse than failing a school test for Peter? Nothing, because he is asian.

Whats a never ending Opium for the stupid, mentally depraved un educated population? Christianity

How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

Q: Why was the american flag red, white, and blue? A:Because that's how it is!

Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

Denard Robinson

How many squirrels does it take to change a lightbulb? 42.

Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

why did the girl cross the road? no one knows because she was hit with a car and died on impact.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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