What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

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why did the baby cross the road? he was stapled to the chicken

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Q: What is the fastest way to get insulted? A: Go screw yourself m0therf0cker!

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What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

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What is the crunchiest part of a Vegetable? It depends if by Vegetable you mean the food or the disabled human incapable of carrying out simple, daily tasks, in which case this joke would be referring to canibalism.

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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a black man, a Jew, a Chinese man and a polar bear walk into a bar, the bar tender says sorry no animals allowed in the bar, so the polar bear left and the other three ordered some drinks and had a nice time

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A polish guy Is sick of being made fun of for his ethnicity, so he decides that he is going to act Italian thinking that no one makes fun of Italians. He stays home for weeks to practice this and one day walks out, up to a store and says"eh, get me some lasagna and zucchini !" the man at the store asks if he's polish.

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a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

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that green thing is not a leaf, it's my sister

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Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

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You mom is to dumb when she herd about Walgreens she thout all the walls were green

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A child finally stood up to the school bullies! Recently the news did a story about a school shooting.

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Q:what do you call someone who spends 7 hours a day playing video games? A: Someone who takes pride and joy from gaming

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What happens when a man farts a fancy memorial party in a ball room in England... At least 1000 people die somewhere on earth in the time his butt squeezed out that fart. And I'm sure someone gets raped.

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You in love with me? Like platonic? Fine, we will move operations elsewhere, you really got to tell me who you are working for someday.

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God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

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A woman walked into a bar. She dragged her drunk husband off his stool and left.

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If bananas are purple, then what color are oranges? I am not going to tell you the answer because this joke has no significance whatsoever.

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Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

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What did George Bush say when 9/11 happened? "Silly pilots! The airport isn't in a building!"

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Robin, your mother has AIDS.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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