a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

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John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

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What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

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what do You call a white man killing a black man? a accident

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Q. Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? A. Because he had alzheimer's and couldn't remember how to ride a bike.

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How are grapes and squirrels similar? They're both purple. Except for the squirrel.

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patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Dog Dog wh- wait how did you knock? *mindblown*

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Whats the difference between platinum blondes? Absolutley nothing they all look exactly the same.

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despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

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Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

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Q. Why hasn't LeBron won a ring? A. Throughout his career, he has been placed with incapable teammates, thus leading to unsuccessful results. However, recently, he has been placed with individuals valid pod achieving such a goal.

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A Priest, a Rabbi and a Shaman walk into a bar. The Bartender looks at them and says "What is this a Joke?"

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There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

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There were three soap salesmen in a bar. They were comparing how good they were at selling their wares. "I'm so good that I sell 60% of my soap bars each day," says the first salesman, bragging. The second one wasn't to be outdone. "I'm so good that I sell 80% of my soap bars," he declared. The last salesmen, who, up to the moment had been relatively quiet, suddenly said in a calm and collected manner, "Oh that's nothing. I'm so good that I sell all of my soap bars each day."

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hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And so are you But the roses have wiltered The violets are dead The sugar bowl is empty And so is your head

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Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

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Why was the little girl sad? She had a grown man sexually assault her.

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Why did the blonde turn down prostitution? She knows it is illegal and has better moral values than that.

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why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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whats worse then being married to your dog eating your dog out

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knock knock. who's there? your neighbor. o hi come one in!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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