A women was driving along in her brand new, swanky, red ferrari when she spotted a red light in the distance. She stopped steadily, following the rules of the road. All of a sudden a loud bang came from behind her where a young driver had hit her at 50 mph. They both come to an abrupt stop and exited their vehicles. The women says "Idiot, you just hit me!" The boys says "oh don't worry, I have insurance."

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Why did the circus clown lose his balance? He had a seizure while on his unicycle, fell off, and bumped his head, leading to significant blunt trauma in the brain. Weeks later, after waking up from a coma, the doctors discover that he can no longer speak anything other than gibberish. His friends and family decide that he cannot go on living this way and decide to pull the plug.

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it was a black guy a white guy a chinese guy a french guy an arab guy an irish guy and a juncky that was too much for a joke

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Why was six afraid of seven? He wasn't. that joke is just a way to convince you that seven is a scary number.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

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You in love with me? Like platonic? Fine, we will move operations elsewhere, you really got to tell me who you are working for someday.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why don't some black men have jobs? Because they won't work

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what did the little boy get for christmas? nothing his parents stuck him in a mental ward to forget about him because he was mentally challenged.

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If you have a dinosaur, how many bicycles do you need to do your homework? Yes, because chewing gums would ask if Greg can go to the handball match.

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How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

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Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

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What do you call it when a black guy is talking to a white guy? A conversation.

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What do you call a man who never farts in public? A private tooter!

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What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing 'cause you done told the b i t c h twice!

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despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

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Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

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no.

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why was the baby crying? cause his abusive father broke his arm.

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Why did the man fall over...he had a stroke!

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If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

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a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

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What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

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Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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