What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

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Why couldn't the hobo buy any clothes? They did not have his size available.

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Why was the cookie sad? It had just been eaten and is currently disintegrating in the hydrochloric acid of someones stomach.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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A man goes to his doctor and asks: ""What is wrong with me doc? One moment I think I am a teepee, the next moment I a, a wigwam." To which the doctor responds: "I have told you several times sir; you have stage IV pancreatic cancer."

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A stand-up comedian quits his job. He has social anxiety and can't stand the pressure.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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roses are red violets are blue do i care? no.

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what's 2 + 2 ? 4, unless you add it up wrong.

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Yo mama is so hairy! Then only language she speaks is Chinese

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

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Why did Bob drop his ice cream? Because he got hit with a super models TIttys

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, it's not that hard.

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its neck.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have alzheimers, cheese on toast.

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Listen Nero, you consider us like friends too right?

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs.

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Your mother is so fat, we needs two fat jokes to adequatly make fun of her.

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Billy and Joseph are playing Rock paper scissors. Billy says paper. Joseph proceeds to throw a rock as hard as he can at Billys face and sends him to the emergency room where he was later diagnosed with terminal testicular cancer.

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chuck norris threw a grande and killed 50 people then the grande blew up

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what did the black guy say to the white guy? black guy: hello how are you doing white guy: good i guess.... just heard they shut down KFC black guy: that sucks

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Q. Why do televisions come with clickers A. So you don't have to get up to change the channel

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why was six afraid of seven? it wasn't. numbers dont have feelings.

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Roses are read, Violets are blue, I have aids, now so do you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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