What's worse than stubbing your toe? Slavery.

How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

Knock knock. Who's there? The police, you murdered ten people.

You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

A Priest and a Rabbi find a very young lost child. They both agree that their religions obligate them to find the child shelter.

My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

What's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile of dead babies with a live one crawling out.

What did the boy with four arms get for Christmas? A Laptop. Why couldn't he use it? He had no fingers.

Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Dementia.

Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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