anti jokes are really funny

What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

A tall German man and a short Ukrainian woman walk into a pub and sit down for a drink. The German, not wanting to seem rude, asks the Ukrainian how her day has been. The Ukrainian smiles confusedly as she doesn't understand German.

What's upside down? umop apisdn

How can you tell if a duck is under your bed? Look under your bed

Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting a needle shoved up your penis and it scrapes the insides of your balls open so that all of the sperm pours out of your balls and you are screaming in agony and you can never have children in the future.

Man: I just bought this hearing aid Friend: How much did it cost Man: No it's 8 o'clock

Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

Knock Knock Who's there? Sorry, wrong house.

Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

Your mumma is so fat that she wears large clothes.

why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

Why did humpty dumpty fall off a wall? Well it turns out that he was a raging psycopath. to add on, he was also a suicidal

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

Teacher: Why did you fail this test? Student: Because the hamster that gives energy to my brain just died.

How does a person with Alzheimers' poem go? Roses are red, Roses are red, Roses are red, Wait, what was I doing?

What happened to the gun that was jammed? It didn't shoot.

There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

Why can't Hellen Keller play the piano? She's dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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