And so he penguin said, The is my most casual outfit!" HAAAW

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did little Katie fall off her bike? Because the postman killed the bee hive.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Q. Why did Sarah fall off of the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sarah!

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What did little John do when he was bored? He went on Anti-Joke

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Q: What do you say when you see your T.V. floating at night? A: That's so frickin awesome

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken is now getting flowers for her dead children that got hit buy multiple cars, also the chicken is a human mother.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Remember that part where Jesus gets angry at a fig three and kills it because it "was lazy" for refusing to grow figs at winter? Brother Jeez, that was kinda mean man! You know it was winter rite? Anti Joke or not, that part is funny, so if Jesus returns and wants you to make him a sammich you better go get that goddamn sammich!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

once upon a time there was a chicken, it crossed a road however unlikely this chicken has become famed for its crossing and will be hailed for eternity. through the chickens actions thus the first anti joke was born

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What is white and cannot jump? A refridgerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Oracle horacle, you big bloated boracle!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

whats the difference between harry potter and a jew? harry potter can escape the chamber

thumb_up thumb_down -34

In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

-What's long, hard and full of semen? -Since this is a play on words both an erect penis and a naval submarine could apply here

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the bakery run out of the business? They weren't making enough dough

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was tired of this joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why do black people always sit in the back of the bus? There aren't any available seats in the front.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

How do you knock a cat out of a tree? If that doesn't work, use a lethal BB gun

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A man walked into a bar. He was treated at the local hospital with a minor contusion.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops