Why did little jimmy fall of his bike? His grandma threw the refrigarator at him.

Why was the little boy hit by a bus? I pushed him

Roses are Red Violets are Blue If you think this is gonna rhyme, You're dead wrong.

Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

Why did the blonde fail her science test? Because she spent all day at the hair salon getting her hair died from brown to blonde when she should have spent the time productively studying.

A blonde walks out of a hair salon She had just dyed her hair.

A Mexican guy, a black guy, and an ISIS member walk into a bar. The black and Mexican men, realizing the potential danger in the situation quickly exit the bar and alert the proper authorities. $

How many straight naked men can you fit in a wardrobe? I'm not sure but the situation is highly unlikely!

Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

why did the boy call the girl a bitch? Because she was beautiful.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know because he got hit by a car.

A Man Gets Cancer He eventually Loses all his hair and drops dead

A man was arguing with his wife over the phone at a trainstation. She threatened to leave him he did not stop his physical abuse. The man became so mad he hung up the phone. He then noticed a blind man was grinning at the overheard discussion. The husband walked over and pushed the blind man on the tracks. He died

What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and i am too

An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

Why did the man walk instead of taking the bus? Because he felt like getting a heathy workout.

Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing? A. She had no arms Q. Why didn't she get back up? A. She had no legs Q. Why did no one help her up? A. She had no friends Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing A. She had no arms You: knock knock Other person: who's there? You: not Lucy

"What's black when clean, but white when dirty?" "A blackboard."

Your momma's so stupid she stuck a power cable up her ass. Shortly after she died

Whats the same between a baby and pizza? their both edible

why was 6 afraid of 7 7 was a serial rapist with a anger problem

Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...