What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor performs the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

Knock knock "Honey, could you get the door?" "I'm tired of doing everything here! Get you ass up and do it yourself!" "Well why don't you just go back to bar you whore?" "This marriage was a mistake, I'm going back to mother!" They divorced 5 months later.

Why did the girl fall off of her swing? Because she had no arms.

What do you all a black person on the moon? An Astronaut

Roses are grey Violets are grey Colorblindness isn't funny And neither are you

whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

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"So, what do you fancy doing tonight?" "Does it matter? We'll end up doing what you want anyway..."

What's a fry cook's favorite day? Saturday. It's his day off.

Iceland is actually green and Greenland is actually icy and Germany started the Holocaust.

Why didn't the kid eat lunch at school? He wasn't hungry.

What's good about sex with twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

Optimist: The glass is half full. Pessimist: The glass is half empty. Realist: Find something better to do than talk about a glass.

whats something you really wanna call a black person it starts with an "N" and ends in an "R" A. Friend i was joking about the "N" and "R"

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers

Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

God is real.

Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because his face was stapled to the wall.

why was the 6 year old boy crying? his mother had just passed away from terminal cancer and his stepdad caught him crying so he kicke hm in the face and told him to man up.

Why can't hank swim? Hank is a rock.

Why did the aisian man get pulled over? Because he was going over the speed limit .

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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