- Anti Joke

Hush, little baby, don't say a word, Mama's going to buy you a mockingbird. If that mockingbird won't sing, Mama's going to buy you a another mockingbird.

How many jews can you put in a four seat car? two in the front two in the back.

Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? Pulls out finger gun Screams BOOM!

How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

i punched my mother in the face once she cried

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from ebola

Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

Why was the boy sad? Because a freak accident killed his mum his dad his best friend and he lost both his legs and is unable to feed himself

Whats worse than tripping? Getting shot

What happens when an alien goes out in the rain It gets wet

Why was the man sent to the hospital? He got crushed by a flying refrigerator.

What did the man say before he died? I am going to die.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

when nothing goes right go left because if you go straight you will fall off the cliff

why was 6 afraid of seven? cause 7's a n i g g a

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

Tony Romo

what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

what did the rabbi say to the priest? jesus christ, your breath stinks.

Hush, little baby, don't say a word, Mama's going to buy you a mockingbird. If that mockingbird won't sing, Mama's going to buy you a another mockingbird.

How many jews can you put in a four seat car? two in the front two in the back.

Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? Pulls out finger gun Screams BOOM!

How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

i punched my mother in the face once she cried

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from ebola

Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

Why was the boy sad? Because a freak accident killed his mum his dad his best friend and he lost both his legs and is unable to feed himself

Whats worse than tripping? Getting shot

What happens when an alien goes out in the rain It gets wet

Why was the man sent to the hospital? He got crushed by a flying refrigerator.

What did the man say before he died? I am going to die.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

when nothing goes right go left because if you go straight you will fall off the cliff

why was 6 afraid of seven? cause 7's a n i g g a

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

Tony Romo

what did i get my mom for her birthday? Nothing im selfish

What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

Stephen hawking walks into a bar.

what did the rabbi say to the priest? jesus christ, your breath stinks.

Hush, little baby, don't say a word, Mama's going to buy you a mockingbird. If that mockingbird won't sing, Mama's going to buy you a another mockingbird.

How many jews can you put in a four seat car? two in the front two in the back.

Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? *Pulls out finger gun* *Screams BOOM!*

How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

i punched my mother in the face once she cried

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from ebola

Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

Why was the boy sad? Because a freak accident killed his mum his dad his best friend and he lost both his legs and is unable to feed himself

Whats worse than tripping? Getting shot

What happens when an alien goes out in the rain It gets wet

Why was the man sent to the hospital? He got crushed by a flying refrigerator.

What did the man say before he died? I am going to die.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? Pulls out finger gun Screams BOOM!