Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Person 1: What do you get when you cross a cow and your mom? Person 2: What? Person 1: A cow that looks like your mom

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A blonde dies Lololol

thumb_up thumb_down +29

If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

if you are reading this your wasting your time

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What sound does a dead cat make? Nothing, it's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Roses are grey Violettes are grey I am colour blind And I suck at rhymes

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

"Knock-knock." "Come in, sorry that the doorbell is broken."

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How did the failing slut get an A -she studied really hard

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops