Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A sad guy walks in to a bar and the bartender asks, what's the matter? The guy responds, I just found out i'm deaf

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Roses are red Violets are blue We decapitated some little children Now I'm in jail too.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

A Finnish guy and a Russian guy go into a sauna. The Russian died.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call a one legged , one eyed, canadian fisherman called Samuel Browning? Mr Browning unless you are on friendly terms then Sam is fine.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Not yours.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

what's black and white and red all over? nothing... it's red

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Who stole the cookies from the cookie jar? Who me? Couldn't be.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Asian son: "I'm using a calculator for my math" Asian mother: "Why not you calculatnow!"

thumb_up thumb_down -15

is the glass of milk half empty or half full it is scientifically proven that these are the same thing. Choosing one over the other is like saying that 1/2 does not equal 1-1/2. A normal person would just see this as an ordinary glass of milk.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

If the blue dog falls out of sample object, how many bananas does my mom eat? No, because markers can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why is Lindsay Lohan out of prison? No, I'm asking.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What has Whitney Houston got in common with a spider? They're both black and they can't get out of the bathtub

thumb_up thumb_down -15

FIONN'S ECONOMICS GRADE

thumb_up thumb_down -15

They usually say "fuck" the police! But no one wants to fuck the police...

thumb_up thumb_down -15

If John has 50 candy bars and eats 45, what does he have? Diabetes. John has diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the little boy fall over. Because someone shot him in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Three men are on a plane (note this is a low altitude plane) they're are going on they're 2nd grizzly bear hunting trip in Alaska. they crash into a mountain and all die. except the pilot. he left the wreckage and died from the freezing temperatures of an Alaskan winter.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

What is black and white and red all over? Interracial sex partners with smallpox.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

What did the disrespectful cow say to his parents? Mooo. I hate you both

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why can't a cat fly Because it doesn't have wings.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Jesus walks on water, Humans are 70% water, I can walk on humans, Therefore i am 70% Jesus.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

To men walk into a bar. One says to a paying customer, "Mind if I sit here?" and the other man inquires the bartender about so.e fancy drink that takes five minutes to prepare. After 23 minutes, naturally, they left at exactly the same time and they went home to their wife and kids. They both share a wife and kids.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How you know when dislextic

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops