Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry and lost man passes by and considered eating one of the muffins. Unfortunately he can't make a decision in time and took of in his 4-wheel drive. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin the camel ate was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

Why didn't Josh go to school? On his way to school, a majestic flying homeless man hit him in the head with a sea cucumber.

Once there was an ugly barnical, He was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

An optimistic person says the glass is half full Pessimistic people say the glass is half empty Engineers say the glass is 2 times the size it needs to be.

Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because its owner was neglecting him and the kitten later died of malnurisment

how do you make Will Smith cry? cut off his toes and fingers.

What do elves get for Christmas? Overtime.

Why was the black man arrested? He was tried and convicted in a court of law for being an accessory to murder.

what's funny about war? nothing!

what do you call a shitty anti-joke? A shitty anti-joke.

knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

There once lived a man in Peru. He lived in a small apartment then died of kidney failure.

Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

"bluar blah blah blarRR/ the stupid pointless part" dead people/ animals/ objects can't talk/ drive/ operate compueter, lol I'm so focken funni

Why did jasmine drop her shopping? And no its not because she did'nt have arms infact she did have arms she just did'nt have any hands

HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

"You just went and made a new dinosaur?" "And due to its well-developed core muscles the staff behind Jurassic World has called it - 'ABDOMINUS PEX'." "That's a stupid name."

Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo "who"? Boo Radley. I live down the street.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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