1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

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Yo mama so fat when she goes to the gym, she makes her trainer skinnier.

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What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

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Two muffins are in an oven. They say absolutely nothing because they're muffins and not sentient.

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What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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What did Billy say to Jesus when he died? Nothing he went to hell. -Austin Conradt

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Wanna hear the most repeated joke on anti jokes? Why did [insert name here] fall off the swing? Because he/she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not [insert name here].

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I? Everett

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How do you make your father cry? Poke him in the eye with a shovel, then continue to lower his self esteem with insults.

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Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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Q: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on and sleep in? A: A toothbrush, a chair and a bed

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what did the kid with no hair get for christmas? cancer.

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In soviet russia, child molests you! Unfortunately true

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A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

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What do you call a fat guy? A fata*s mothaf*cka

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whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

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Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because Sally has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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What is sad and disappointing? Nevada's and California's snow pack.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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so theres a plane, inside the plane are 500 solid bricks one falls out, how many are left? 499 What are the three steps to putting an elephant into a refrigirator? Open the fridge, put in the elephant, close the fridge. What are the four steps to putting a dear in the fridge? Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer and then shut the fridge. It's Simba's birthday, what animal isn't there? The deer. its still in the fridge. a lady is walking across a street, she suddenly falls to the ground why? Because the brick hit her in the face. (:

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Knock, Knock... Whose there? panther panther who? panth-er no panths im goin' swimmin'

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What do a duck and a bicycle have in common? They both have handlebars, except for the duck!

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Your a christain on a lovely vacation with your family a querr waalks by. What do you do? you push the queer of the edge.

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A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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