Why didn't the cat play with the ball of yarn? It was drowned in a toilet.

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Sally heard a scream in a dark room and went to go see who it was. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally...

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts.

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Q: Why was the old man sad? A: Because he has a quarter super glued to the bottom of his foot

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Two muffins are cooking in the oven, they say nothing to one another as muffins can't talk

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Anti-Joke is a sticky wicket.

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What the flower say to the bird. Nothing

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Q: What's worse then 10 babies nailed to a tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees

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I walked into a Mcdonald's and ordered a Big Mac. I regretted it later.

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Wanna know what a hate about instructions? I always get my dick stuck in a ceiling fan.

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Why does the Pentagon have twice as many toilets built as is legally obliged? Racial segregation

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what's small, red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

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What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

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Why did the legless person roll down a hill? Because he was in a wheelchair

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What is the most hardest math known to man kind? 1+1=?

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What's the difference between a Mexican and a T-Rex? Humans are vertebrates belonging to the Mammalia class, chiefly a member of the species Homo sapiens; dinosaurs are chiefly terrestrial, herbivorous or carnivorous reptiles from the extinct orders Saurischia and Ornithischia.

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Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

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Why is Keven's name spelled with an E Because his parents are black.

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How did the black guy get knocked out? He was hit by a fridge.

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

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Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

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Hey you know what? What? Never mind.

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A Jew, Muslim and Mexican all die of cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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