How does a man with no legs cross a road? In his wheelchair.

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I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's dead.

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Why was the Mexican sleeping? He wishes to decrease his risk of motor vehicle accidents.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

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why did the teacher quit her job and become a musician? Because her class was very mean to her and growing up she had always wanted to play music

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roses are red violets are blue this verse doesn't ryhme and neither does this one

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A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

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Knock knock. Who's there? the police.

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What time is it in Florida? Time To Eat The President Of The United States!

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in Pennsylvania? He woke up...

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What happened to the man that walked into the bar... He walked into the bar

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Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

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A family walks into a talent agency. Talen agent says "Okay, what's your act called?" Dad replies "The Aristocrats!"

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Mam: Wanna hear a joke about my penis?... nevermind, it's to long. Woman: wanna hear a joke about my vagina?... nevermind, u wouldn't get it.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo "who"? Boo Radley. I live down the street.

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Who won the championship last year? There was no championship

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hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

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Why can't Molly ride her bike? Because she has no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Molly.

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why was allison crying? because her mom's dead.

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Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

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Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Son: i like gaming Mom: you are wasting your life *son jumps in trash can

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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