Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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Why did the African boy die? He was denied any antibiotics to heal his severe case of mono and AIDS, and was living on dirty water and dirt.

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What's wrong with black people? They tend to make mistakes, as do all humans

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Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

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How was the copper wire invented? 2 Jews pulling on the same penny!

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You're Mom is Dead She was killed by a Grammer Nazi for me misspelling Your

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

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whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

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What is the difference between Steve Jobs and a PC? PC's are not dead.

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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A traveling salesman stops at a farmer's house. The farmer then offers the salesman a bed with his daughter. The salesman quickly replied, "I don't want to go to bed right now. I need to know the way to Pawtucket." The farmer then gave the salesman directions and the two parted ways.

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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what did the fish say when i threw it at the wall. Ouch. Then the world ended because it caused a ripple in the fabric of reality.

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Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

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how did the kid cut open his forehead? by putting on his underwear!

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Roses are Blue Violets are red, I need to go the the bathroom

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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what is the difference between my girlfriend and my black pet bunny .... i raped my black pet bunny

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What's the difference between an apple and a black person? Well theres a huge difference but they both taste good in peanutbutter

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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