Why can't a cat fly Because it doesn't have wings.

"George? I wanna tend da wabbits, George" - Lennie Smalls

A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

Why did the goat cross the road. To put his sacrifices into the pentagram.

What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

What do you call an African American sitting on a park bench? Elephant-man (I forgot to mention, he has a giant elephant trunk)

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him and got better.

What do you call a black man in green shoes and a yellow hat ? Nothing,thats just him pursuing in his own regular casual outfit there for you would just notice him as a normal man walking around with shoes and a hat on so there is nothing to call him

roses are red vilotes are blue i thought i was bent but then i met you

What does a blond do when she stops at a red light? She gets arrested.

What did the coat say to the dog? Nothing, the coat was inanimate

There were two blondes at an ATM. One was entering her PIN number and the other one says, "Haha! I know your password! It's ****!" The other one replies, "Haha! No, it's 1358."

What happens when you shoot someone? They die.

A sad guy walks in to a bar and the bartender asks, what's the matter? The guy responds, I just found out i'm deaf

life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? A= Were both lawyers! What happens every sixty seconds in the us? A= a minute passes!

Listen Supervisor, this is Agent Clarke of the GOV and the WHO, I suggest you respond ASAP, I suggest you put set me in touch with either Lady, or Axel Knight right away, this is a matter of your personal security.

why did the guy laugh at everything he was high

A knock knock B who's there A nobody

24

Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

A man walks into a bar. Ow

Why was the little girl crying in the woods at night? There was psychotic killer chasing her with a chainsaw.

I like my wine like I like my women. Not at all.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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