How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

why didn't the baby cry once it came out of the womb? because it was a stillborn.

An animal entered my house tonight ! It could only be one thing : A bear or a dog.

Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

what's red and has seven feet? the red man who had seven feet as a result of a serious genetic mutation

Tim is a bald headed prick with an annoying voice and he looks like a clean shaven Walter White if he was on the same drugs that he was making and he looks like he smokes too much because the wrinkles on his forehead look like lips.

What did the White guy say to the balck guy? "How are you?"

Why did the Jew die? Because of old age

Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

"You must defeat Shen Long to stand a chance"

*Wear a Mario costume* What happened to Luigi? I ate him.

Q:Why did the boy drop his ice cream? A: A terrorist threw a refrigerator at him then slapped the ice cream out of his hand

Knock Knock Who's there? Mormens...

Hah, I bet a faggot that lost his balls in the war is "above" such things as seduction and all things straight! 25 million US dollars, send them to me within a week, or I will hunt you down by tracking down every single one of your fucking followers (all six of them), and make you wish you where dead. And tell me where you live, send me your sister so I can rape her, send me your boyfriend so I can cut him to pieces, send my your children so I can make sure your genes stop, send my your mothers tits so I can hang them on my wall, and kill your father and post the shit on youtube! Maybe then we are halfway close a settlement.

Roses are brown Violets are brown who the hell took a shit in my garden?

A man walks into a bar. He tricks a lady into smelling a rag doused with chlorophoam, and rapes her.

A guy uses Google locations to find his friend Chuck Norris.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock, knock Who's there? Not Susie

Why did Mr. Moseley choose to not buy crest toothpaste this month? Because your daughter got an abortion.

I've always hated people saying "last one there is a rotten egg" because don't you want to be a rotten egg so you don't get eaten?

whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? babies aren't fruit.

-Knock knock! -Who's there? -DEFAX.

John: what is blue and goes blub blub Phil; I don't know, what? John: a blue blub blub. What is green and goes blub blub Phil; a green blub blub John: no green blub blubs don't exist, what are you stupid?

What did your mom get for christmas ? A stairstepper.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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