Your mamas so fat that she went to the doctor and he said she has a very high case of diabetes so now she's trying to excerise more and watching what she eats.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Mormens...

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How do you get rid of an STD? You give it to someone else.

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Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

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My girlfriend told me I couldn't satisfy her sexually. I told her she was beautiful and gave her flowers.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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Is Yered a dumbass? YA

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In Soviet Russia, you wouldn't have a likely chance of surviving because of Stalin's mass paranoia and total neglect for his fellow man.

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Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

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I've never seen a zebra use that crossing.

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Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

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Q: What do you call a vacuum that doesn't suck stuff up? A: A broken vacuum.

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What do you call a man in a wall? Stuck.

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A kid comes across an injured duck near a lake. Nevermind he doesn't see it he's really high.

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Did you know that... Billy had a heart attack, it was sad. Now you know!

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Why did Little Timmy eat Smarties before school? Because he was hungry.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

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What did Joe get for his first birthday? Nothing he died at birth

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Why did the little boy fall over. Because someone shot him in the face.

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How many nazis does it take to kill 1.2billion Jews? No one cares anymore it was 60 years ago \(._.\) (/._.)/

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How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

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Q: What's the difference between an Indian and a Trampoline. A: You take your shoes off to jump on a Trampoline.

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Q: A football coach walks into a bank. Why? A: Because one of his players is suffering from terminal cancer and he needs governmental funding for the team to play the big game against their rivals and to win, in hopes the kid will recover. Q: Why did the football coach go into the bank again? A: To receive more money to find a new running back.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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