You wanna pop a bottle? I hope you are referring to bottles of water as I am underage and I refuse to partake in any said consumption of alcoholic beverages

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Q: What is the difference between a smart blonde and a UFO? A: One is a human while the other is an unidentified flying object.

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Why didn't the boy want to go to school? Because it was 3am.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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What's orange, looks like and orange, probably tastes like an orange, and has no brain? Donald Trump

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends nose. But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

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A guy walked into a restaurant. He sat down and had a lovely meal left the restaurant got in his car and went home. The End

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A polish guy Is sick of being made fun of for his ethnicity, so he decides that he is going to act Italian thinking that no one makes fun of Italians. He stays home for weeks to practice this and one day walks out, up to a store and says"eh, get me some lasagna and zucchini !" the man at the store asks if he's polish.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

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How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

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Roses are red violets are blue What the heck do flowers Have to do with You?

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whats a joke... Parker Coffey at life

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what do You call a white man killing a black man? a accident

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Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

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Hej Erik och Leo!!

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And now a word from our sponsors

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A apple is red a banana is to never mind that joke sucks

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A man walks into a bar. He realizes that he would need a designated driver if he would want to return home safely. So he then leaves.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

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Jesus saves, passes to Moses who shoots and scores!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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