why did Dayrl win the wheelchair race? Because he had working legs.

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What do you do if some idiot throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.

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What is pink and smells like tuna? Salmon

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

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A hindu and a muslim walk into a bar. They start arguing over their different fundamental religious beliefs and then considering it is an american bar, an american christian extremist quickly shoots them both for being " from that part of the world"

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Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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Chuck Norris shaves with his fists. That's why he still has a beard.

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A deaf man walks into a bar. Someone yells, "FIRE!" and everyone evacuates. The deaf man does not hear him and dies horribly.

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Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

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Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of its legs is both the same

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Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

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What do you get when you add two boys and two girls in a basement? Four people fearing their lives during a tornado.

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what did the red towel and the blue towel say? Nothing because towels are inanimate objects and therefore can't talk.

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Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

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Whats funnier than a black man? A black president

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There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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12 in general

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Feminine hygiene jokes aren't funny. Period

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why did the drug dealer die... because he got terminal cancer and died during the first 3 weeks

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How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

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What is funnier then 25 9/11

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q: why won't the asian girl do anything? a: it's pretty hard to move or speak being gagged and tied up in my basement

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops