Why did the chicken fall down? Because it wanted to have fun

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What's worse than having a FUPA? The Holocaust

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"Knock knock" Come in!

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint.

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Why is evan a lil poop? cause he pooped my poop all the pooping ;)

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Why did the teacher need sunglasses? Because she taught in a classroom with a very big window and the sun kept getting in her eyes.

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What did little John do when he was bored? He went on Anti-Joke

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wanna hear a joke? i dont like kids wanna hear a lie? im typing with two hands wanna hear a another? my hand isnt on my weiner

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

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Why does Hilter hate Jews? He's incapable of hating because he's dead.

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What is blue and has wheels? Grass- I lied about the colour and the wheels.

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A classic (apologies if it's been posted before): A woman was riding the bus home after a day of shopping. Suddenly she jumped up, shouting "may aspirins! My aspirins!" The driver replied: "You probably left them on the counter at the drugstore."

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Why does the girl continue to cry repetently everyday? Because she found out she was diagnosed with terminal cancer.

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A duck walks into a bar and says, "Put it on my bill"

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Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

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What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My D**K

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What happens when you finish a bottle of Sprite? You finish it

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Evil Witch: Hey Snow White, want an apple. Snow White: No thank you, I just ate, I'm good. Evil Witch: But its good! Snow White: No thanks, I'm good! Evil Witch: Ill put caramel on it!! Snow White: NO THANKS! Evil Witch: FINE!! The Evil Witch then pulled out an AK - 47 and violently murdered Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

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ok so ive been pondering for a while now for a joke to submit and here is what ive got, tell me what you think: quif stain

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What did the computer say to the mouse? Nothing inanimate objects cant talk

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What did the pineapple say to the orange? Nothing; Neither a pineapple nor an orange contains the necessary muscles to produce speech.

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what does STFU stand for? the southern tenant farmers union.

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yo mother is so fat, the recursive function computing her mass causes a stack overflow.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga in the morning You poke her face

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops