Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant black scorpions.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A dancer walks into a barre

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? He said : "where's my tractor?!"

thumb_up thumb_down +19

You go to the Anti Joke website, what do you find under the "newest" section? Black jokes.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

thumb_up thumb_down +19

One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Blonde: Where's the ice? Asian: In the freezer.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the mother say to her son when she saw his report card? I don't know. I wasn't there.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

thumb_up thumb_down +17

How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

A man runs into a bar and yells "Ow!!" He is hospitalized due to severe trauma to the head and spine.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

So, what happens when Germany attacks France? France proceeds to slaughter the attackers mercilessly, as it was during the Feudal Ages, a time when France was Europe's superpower.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A horse walks into a bar and Shits John Taffer is Pissed

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Hey, in case you are around and still wonder how he got out. Anonymous tip from yours truly, if he had remained there, you would all have taken the blame. Just stay away from the deep web, and I wont be forced to come get all of you as well. For a long while I was suspicious that you might have been leaking information regarding me and all of us, but then the rules changed and information regarding Point Zero, subtle hints and such, began spreading, it has been removed, nobody will know what Intel was sold, so yeah, he was a mole, he is no more, for this I am sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the black man grab and tie up the white woman? Because the white woman was a serial killer who has been on the FBI's most wanted list for killing children.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops