Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

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What did the Jamacian say to his friends? Yo me Rastas' on de cloud shroud atta boy 9PM we rizzle into da hitasses bar and we order us da drink of "grandpa's cough medicince" me tinks, who grees wid my view od oftaday Rastas?

What did the aborted fetus say to the recycling bin? Nothing because it isn't capable of speaking, and it was in the dumpster

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I wumbo, you wumbo, he, she, wumbo, wumbology the study of wumbo

Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

An African-American is like a hammer. It can't be trusted in the hands of women.

How did the Mexican get into the united States of America? He was an american citizen, just of mexican descent.

whats worse than the black death. Bieber Fever

Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? He's dead.

Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

Past, present, and future walk into a bar. It was tense!

if u read this u r bent A. Now your bent

Jemal picks 3 apples. He eats two of them, and then picks 3 more. What color was Jamal?

9/11 my birthday

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A new pair of shoes

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

How do you punish Hellen Keller Move the furniture around

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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