A man walked into a doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

Q. What's The Best Thing About Having Sex With Twenty Three Year Old's? A. There are 20 of them...

What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

What do you call a girl with an iq of 13 Dead

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

Roses are crimson. Violets are purple. I don't understand why this poem is so popular.

i punched my mother in the face once she cried

What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

pobody's nerfect

bite me

roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

a person who will soon die of beeties

What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

Q: Why did Timmy cry? A: You would too if you had your arm cut off

Did you hear why the peanut got arrested by walking next to another peanut? One got a-salt-ed

Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

What did the man say to the other man. Hi

If life hands you lemons... Question yourself what just happened because life isn't tangible and has no way of handing you lemons, and even if it did, why lemons?

I beheld M.Bison/Raul Julia, as I fell down from the sky LIKE LIGHTNING! Your friendly r*pist Moral Man: You don`t like me? MAAN That gets me on... As for Horny, I was born with two of them... The third is a burning stake. ...So you like me... Meh! No fun when they don`t struggle nor squeal, even if they do scream in pain...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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