What did the fork say to the spoon? I have tongs and you don't. Ha.

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What's sad about a guy jumping off a cliff? The cliff.

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Harry thrust his wand forward, "Expelliarmus!" Voldemort casually ducks, and fires a killing curse at our hero.

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Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

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What is a waste of time and money? Your mother.

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have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower? No? well it must have been hiding pretty well.

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what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

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A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

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So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Slavery.

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Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

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Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

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Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

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Three Jews walked into a bar. I lied... it was a gas chamber.

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

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A fully grown cow walks into a man's house and says to him, "Hey, how have you been?" Traumatized by the vivid circumstances, the man falls to the floor and begins sobbing relentlessly until he passes out onto the floor from a violent mental breakdown.

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Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

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I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

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whats wores than eating a vag. a gaint vag eating you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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