Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

Hey, you know what would be funny? A joke.

Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

You wanna hear what's totally out of this world? The moon

What did the girl with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A bike!

When the going gets tough... Commit suicide.

Yo mama so short she often has to ask you to retrieve items from the top shelf of her cabinet.

Why did Billy kill Joey? Joey had sex with Billy's wife... and Billy wanted revenge.

Knock knock Who's there? Overused punchline Overused punchline who? The Holocaust.

What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

Why can't Hellen Keller watch Spongebob? She doesn't have the proper cable service

When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

Robin, get in the Batmobile.

Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

Why did the cookie go to the hospital? Because he felt crummy.

Two men walk into a bar. The first man says to the bartender "I'd like some h2o". The second man says "I'd like some h2o to". The second man died.

Roses are red and i like Pie but seriously, i don't care if you die

Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

Error 37.

Where is Jew University? Berlin, Germany

What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

What do you call five black me pushing a car? "Very nice young men who helped me when I broke down," according to my grandmother.

How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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