A brunette, a redhead, and a blond are all stuck on an island 100 miles away from the nearest civilization with no resources. After 2 weeks, they decide that no one is going to save them and they have to swim for it. The brunette swims 25 miles and then gets eaten by sharks. The redhead swims 75 miles and then drowns. The blond swims 99 miles but got tired, so she swam back.

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Three men are on a plane (note this is a low altitude plane) they're are going on they're 2nd grizzly bear hunting trip in Alaska. they crash into a mountain and all die. except the pilot. he left the wreckage and died from the freezing temperatures of an Alaskan winter.

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"Do you like pie?" "No." "Do you like blueberries?" "No." "I have something you won't like." "Is it a blueberry pie?" "No, I shagged your wife last night".

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whore whroe whore whore whore whroe

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-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? -Probably a decent amount.

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How do you make a lawyer cry? You can't. The production of tears requires a soul, which, regretfully, no lawyer possesses.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass i was lying about the wheels.

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What has 2 wheels and looks like a bike? A bike.

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What is black and white and red all over? A dalmation that was hacked to death with a machete.

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If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

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Your mom is so ugly and stupid that people make fun of her and that's not nice.

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Why did David Hasselhoff talk to his car? Because it was KIT from knight Rider and had voice recognition software and so could understand him

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Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman

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HAHAHAHAHAHA.....shut up your joke isn't better.

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life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

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Everything makes me look good, Rape doesn't look good on anyone, and it hurts everyone involved

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25

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why did the girl fall of her bike She had no arms

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There were two blondes at an ATM. One was entering her PIN number and the other one says, "Haha! I know your password! It's ****!" The other one replies, "Haha! No, it's 1358."

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What did the tide say to the sea?ANSWER-- Long time no sea. LOL Issaiah from OHIO yolo

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why was the man denied his teaching job? because he is a wanted cerial killer in 43 states.

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A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

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What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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