Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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So I have an idea that will solve both world population and hunger problems! I call it the Omni-Abortion law. The idea is that all babies must be aborted and then eaten. Progressive, right?

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Why did the man walk into the wall? He was blind.

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what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

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Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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Knock knock Whose there? Nobody Nobody who? ......................................

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Q: what white hard and huge and it can kill you if you fall out of a tree? A: a refrigerator

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I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. But it wasn't actually getting bigger, it was just getting closer. So I got hit in the face.

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I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

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What's the best example of an anti-joke? This one.

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How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

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How do you kill a blonde? Stab her with a knife.

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Why did the man not get his licence He was blind

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did you know helen keller had a dog? neither did she....

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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Why did the little boy fall off his bike? He was hit by a truck.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Fruit loops.

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Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A pogo stick. Just kidding. Cancer.

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Have you ever had Ugandan food? Neither have they.

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Hi, how are you doing? Good, yourself? Fine, thanks. Have a nice day. You too, bye.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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