What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

What did the hooker say to the black guy? How long do you want it for?

Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

ah-ah. the proper response to an anti joke.

Why was the little Asian boy crying at the county fair? He had just watched his entire family get brutally crushed beneath the weight of the old ferris wheel as they went to get on. Never would he forget the painful screams of his mother as her blood splashed onto his white t-shirt. Never would he forget the police car ride to the foster home when it all sank in that they were truly gone. And never would he forget the abuse his new parents would inflict on him daily. But what would forever torment him most were those screams. Those persistent screams that woke him in the night until the day he died many, many years later.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who are we kidding, when have you ever seen a chicken crossing a road?

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

Theaters say silence is golden... Trap silence in a jar, make millions.

What's the meaning of life? I forgot to write it down.

Doctor: I have good news and bad news. The good news is that your parents survived the car accident. Kid: And the bad news is? Doctor: I have a horrible sense of humor, they're both dead. I'm so sorry.

A man walks in to a bar, and the Bartender says "Why the long face?" The man replies "My wife is dying of Terminal Cancer".

What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

Q. Why did the man walk away from his wife? A. Because he wanted to walk away from his wife.

A man rode into town on Friday and came out on Friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a couple of hours

Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm using my hand but thinking of you.

Why did Michael Jackson name his kid blanket? Because after years of drug abuse and sexual insecurity led to him thinking unrealistically during the birth of his children.

A Chinese man fails a math test

What's the difference between cancer and my grandmother? She doesn't have cancer.

what happened to the batsman with bad footwork? he got out what did the batsman do when he got out? he left the ground due to the nature of the ruling

Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...