"Why did Jim Jones put cyanide in the People's Temple Flavor Aid?" Because he understood that adding sugar would be bad for their teeth.

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How are grapes and squirrels similar? They're both purple. Except for the squirrel.

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Q. Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? A. Because he had alzheimer's and couldn't remember how to ride a bike.

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patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

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Whats the difference between platinum blondes? Absolutley nothing they all look exactly the same.

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John has 5 brownies, 3 chocolate bars, and 62 cookies. What does John have now? Diabetes, John has Diabetes

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What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

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what do You call a white man killing a black man? a accident

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

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Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

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despite popular opinion to the contrary you shouldn't eat mercury.

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Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

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whats worse then being married to your dog eating your dog out

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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knock knock. who's there? your neighbor. o hi come one in!

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Two men enter a room. Two men and a baby leave the room...

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why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

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Why did the blonde turn down prostitution? She knows it is illegal and has better moral values than that.

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sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

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what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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A rooster lays an egg on the tip of a roof. Which side does it fall to? Roosters don't lay eggs

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Listen Nero, I understand now that this is your real name, actually I know where you live thanks to the good old phonebook... ...My order is fully based on respecting and treating all living beings equally and focusing on actually putting old notions such as Gods and superstition away in order to strengthen humankind`s belief in itself and others. As for Nerometal, well, that was one of my... Lesser followers, I assure you they have been taken care off, they will not be bothering you ever again. What would it take for you to forgive our transgressions? Money? Power? Ask and you shall receive, as far as your identity goes, you shall have it back and I shall use another site in the future.

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There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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