How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

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Why couldn't the blond dial 911? She lost her arms in a tragic car accident last year

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"Why did the chicken cross the road? ... To get to your house. Knock knock." "Who's there?" "The chicken"

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What is long, hard, and full of seamen? a school bus, if you consider children to be seamen

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whats the similarities between an xbox and michael jackson? there both made of plastic and they both get turned on by children

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being the worm.

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Roses are red The grass is green I want you in my bed If you know what I mean.

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There's two blondes a black man and a camera man...

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How do you scare Sarah Palin? You chase her around with a chainsaw while wearing a Jason mask.

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roses are red, hills are green. i know you're ugly and i know I'm so mean.

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whats a muslims name with a bomb to his chest Whatever his name is HAHAHAHAHAH

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Wake up in the morning feeling like... Helen Keller

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John and Marry wanted an abortion. God just laughed And Jesus was born Merry Christmas everyone!

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Ask me if I'm a cucumber. Are you a cucumber? No.

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How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

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Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

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Why did Bob the Builder die? He had cancer.

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What did the bullet say to Bin-Laden? Suck it

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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NEVER

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Someone: I like my coffee like I like my men Someone else: Black? Someone: No, tied up, shoved in a burlap sack, and dragged through the mountains.

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Whats something really annoying? A guy who presses enter too much. hehe

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Nebraska the farmland its the only place for me!! I love the corn and the corn loves me!! I live for the corn and the corn lives for me!!

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What happened to the girl who got an abortion? She got an infection.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops