Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

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What time is it? 2:47 PM.

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Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

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WHAT? FRIENDS? DID YOU NOT READ MY QUICKFUCK PROFILE? Likes: Orgies. Favorite color: Pussy. Description:Looking for women with vaginas (maybe an asshole is fine too) Please, I am a womanizer, of course we are friends, heck I am even romantic, you know romantic as in... Uh... Well, maybe not my rose bud... (because that did really not appear at the solve media right now)

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Camon is to Jerry Sandusky as Cole Ryder is to Will Higgins!

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How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

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Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

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If I said you had a beautiful body would you stop asking me if those jeans make you look fat?

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There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

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Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

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What's eighteen inches long, stiff, and makes women scream at night? A twelve inch long penis that is erect, thus adding approximately one half of its flaccid size, and involved in the act of fornication with the female partner of the man whose penis I am describing. (Of course, it is ignorant and juvenile to assume that the man in question is heterosexual. He may be a homosexual, which is perfectly acceptable in these liberal times we live in, or he may in fact be single and not inclined towards a sexual preference of any kind. This is understandable due to the myriad complications of long-term relationships, a result of the infinite differences between the masculine and feminine psyches.)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

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why did susie fall off the dollar coaster? it only cost 50 cents susie is gone now

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a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

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A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

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Allah walked into AK Bar

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What is an offensive way to refer to black people from the time of the Flint Stones? Niggers

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What do you call an orange fruit? An Orange.

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I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

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Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops