Once upon a time a guy took his pants off why because he was touching himself

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. Then the man pays for the beer and drinks the beer.

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A bar walked into a bar. Bars can't walk.

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why did the girl die. because she was bullied and abused everyday by her family and friends. she was homeless and was forced to drop a bomb on her own forest. there fore she stabbed herself.

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One day there was 2 black guys in hoodys with knives in there hand. They tapped me on the shoulder and took my groceries. They then made me a jam sandwich and went on there way

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a white man a black man and an asian man had a few drinks at a bar. they all died from alcohol poisoning

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One linners President Kinnedy did you like the parade President Lincon did you like the play

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You trying to be funny kid? This is a matter of security to the national degree, point zero has been compromised, unless you bring out one of these soon, I am myself going to drag your ass into prison.

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Why a polar bear fell over? He drank so much

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When is the best time to wear a striped sweater? All the time.

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Why did the cat eat his food? Because he was hungry.

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What did the deaf blonde say to the brunette? Nothing.

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man 1.have u sen my girl friend man 2. yes man 1. rely man 2. no man 1. dick

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Stop asking stupid questions.....

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EVERYBODY has a penis!!! Everybody!!!!

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Your momma is so fat, that she decided to sign up for weight-watchers, and is now on her way to a healthy life

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What do you call a black man in green shoes and a yellow hat ? Nothing,thats just him pursuing in his own regular casual outfit there for you would just notice him as a normal man walking around with shoes and a hat on so there is nothing to call him

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How do you make Jacob cry? Take away his xbox

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Roses are red Violets are blue We decapitated some little children Now I'm in jail too.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

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life is like a rapist. sometimes they're nice other times, they ram you in the ass.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

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What did the boy who was in a chainsaw accident yell to his mom when he was on a rollercoaster? Look ma, no hands!

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What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops