What did the traffic light say to the car? dont look at me am changing.

I Have a Black Friend

what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

Who found Anne Frank? The Nazis

Yo mama so ugly, she has to work harder than most women to attract men.

Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

Why was Sally angry? Because somebody burned all her clothes

Q: Why shouldn't you walk under a ladder? A: Because it could fall on top of you. Be a reasonable human being and just fly OVER the ladder.

Whats Brown and Sticky A) a stick

What gets bigger and bigger and bigger, then dies? A baby.

Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

A horse walks into a bar. The Barman asks "why the long face?" The horse says "My son was recently killed in a horrific horse racing accident"

you walk into a bar Griffin: 'are you ok'

Why was the man crying? He just got called and the doctor confirmed he had AIDS.

Why was the black man picking cotton from the backyard? Because he enjoys gardening as a hobby, and prefers to do it every Sunday, after work.

Hey, in case you are around and still wonder how he got out. Anonymous tip from yours truly, if he had remained there, you would all have taken the blame. Just stay away from the deep web, and I wont be forced to come get all of you as well. For a long while I was suspicious that you might have been leaking information regarding me and all of us, but then the rules changed and information regarding Point Zero, subtle hints and such, began spreading, it has been removed, nobody will know what Intel was sold, so yeah, he was a mole, he is no more, for this I am sorry.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your ball sack ripped off with a grapple hook

who do you call when you see a ghost in your apartment? The Mental Hospital.

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

Why did the Asian man have to sit down to pee? Because he had no legs.

If a canoe is stuck in a tree with its headlights on, howmany pancakes does it take to cover the roof of my house? False, snakes don't have armpits!

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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