Why was the black person assassinated behind a drug dealers house? He was purposely shot in the leg and bled out before he could make it to help.

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Who row's? •Liam Findlay

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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What did the archangel Michael say to Jesus? "Hello, Jesus."

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Do you like fish sticks? Yes. Me too.

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Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

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Did you here about the guy who kidnapped Liam Neeson's daughter? Well, he died

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Why do women have boobs? So you've got something to look at while you talk to them. That's sexist... I'm sorry.

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whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

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what happens on labor day? the day she has a baby... ya your having a kid

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What's worse than finding half a worm in an apple? Rape and child abuse.

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I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

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Your moms so stupid she ate all the food in the grocery store

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Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

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YOU WONT GIVE THIS A THUMBS UP!!!! YOU WONT DO ITTTT

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What do you call a black person who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

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What is a white supremacist's favorite color? It varies depending on the individual.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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Why did the baby cross the road? he was taped to the chicken

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A man walks into an exam room for a doctor's appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

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Roses are red Violets are blue, Sugar is sweet But i have commitment issues So I'd rather just be friends at this point in our relationship.

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Do you know how I know you're gay? 'Cuz your dick taste like shit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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