In my country we don't swim, we drown.

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Get on the boat.

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What did the black man do for his science project Which is better homemade or colonel sanders?

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What do you call a black man with a brain injury? Mentally Disabled

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What size pants did the gorilla wear? An abnormaly large pair compared to the average human because their weight and width are porportionaly larger for their speices.

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I got 99 problems but a bitch ain't one . Though , I do have cancer .

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What's worse than having AIDS? A piano falling on your left middle finger.

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL Wasted your time didn't I -All the lol post are by me, LOL GUY.

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How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

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Roses are purple violets are green I am color blind shut up

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why was kade sad? he shit himself

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Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

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Hey guess what? What? You're a Tree.

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Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay for it, eat it and then proceed on disposing the packaging of the klondike bar

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Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause he wanted to get squashed by the giant pancake.

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What do you call a black man running faster than a white man? Usain Bolt

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Miley Cyrus Walked into a fence and fainted.

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What did the teenage boy do when his mum was out shopping? Finish his homework.

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Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

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What do you call your mother's bipolar brother with three arms? Uncle.

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Q. what is your favorite food? A. Chicken, burritos, sandwich, rice, hot dog, turkey, duck, carrot, broccoli, eggplant, apple, blueberry, pear, raspberry, blackberry, orange, grapes fries, chips, cheese, pretzels, worms, and candy canes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not quite sure, but I just realized that my new pair of boxer briefs has ripped along the seam. Oh, and earlier this morning, I stubbed my toe pretty bad. The nail is all purple and the toe is all swollen, it was bleeding profusely until I put three bandages over the wound. It's still throbbing with pain. Oh, and also, a few months ago, I lost my job. It wasn't because I was constantly late or anything, it was more because as a server, I had been required to lift trays and stand and walk for the entirety of my shift. The only problem is, that about a year ago, I was involved in a serious car accident (once again, an occurrence that had not been due to my own actions). This car accident severed my spine in the L5 region. I can now barely walk for long periods of time, I find it impossible to run, I can no longer play sports and enjoy being a 21 year old male. I am in constant pain and it affects my breathing, my legs, the rest of my back, and also my teeth (due to the neurological connections dealing with the spinal cord). I am now currently looking for a new job, a more suitable job, to help sustain my hectic lifestyle. No, it is not a lifestyle of parties and what not, it is merely the lifestyle of living under roof and owning a used car. I have an alcoholic mother and my childhood was devoid a father. I raised myself, and to this day, I still have no family to help me through my financial struggles. I need nearly 2000 dollars in less than a week in order to pay all my bills, have my car fixed, and eat for another month. The only problem is, I have a dollar and 58 cents to my name. I wish I was this chicken, crossing roads, and what not, not just to get to the other side, but to live a better life. But, one can only wish.

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what did the homeless man get for Christmas? nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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