What did robin say to batman before they got I the car........ Get in the car.

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I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

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What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

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What's the hardest part of walking through a pile of dead babies? My penis.

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What would you do if I walked onto your property and started to smash up your mailbox with a sledge hammer? You would be very scared and most probably call the police.

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A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

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Why did the chicken croos the road? It didnt, my father caught him and cooked him for dinner.

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Whats more dangerous then a man with a gun? two men with guns.

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Ask me if I'm a truck! Are you a truck?! No.

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What do you call a black guy doing community service? Someone who wanted to give back. Stop being racist.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had bullied 6 and his old pal 21 back in his younger days.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why can't a chicken cross a road without it being questioned?

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Guy: I have a gun get in my van Girl: SHOTGUN!

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what did the monitor say to the boy? Im a Monitor

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Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

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whats funnier than a black person dieing nothing that is so cruel

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What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A new pair of shoes

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What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

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Whats worse them finding a worm in your apple??? finding out your adopted

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What's worse than Christmas alone? Pedophiles.

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If I said you had a beautiful body would you stop asking me if those jeans make you look fat?

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why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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