How come Susie fell off of the swing? -because I hit her with an axe Coolhsoj

Why was little David sad? His father got hit by a truck.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

what is worse than gay sex wiping your ass with sandpaper

How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

Your dad is so old, he should go to a nursing home.

What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well, neither has he.

Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's. Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's.

What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer caught it.

did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Have you heard the one about the fat woman and the dead baby? The woman was actually pregnant, not fat, and just had a miscarriage.

Knock knock. Whos there? I am you dumbass im standing right next to you.

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

what is worse than 10 dead babies in a trash can? 11 dead babies in a trash can

Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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