you know why they're called ear wigs, right? cause they go in your ears! then they wig out? no, they kill you.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a jam sandwich

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are red Violets are blue ... Uhhhh I don't think anyone knows the rest of this!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

WELCOME TO THE SECRET TOWARDS GOING BEYOND YOUR FIFTH SENSE... UNLOCKING YOUR SIXTH SENSE! (redux:Chronoshift extend Xr`d Utrawave edition) 1, Sound 2. sight 3.touch 4.Smell 5.Taste. 6.Balance? :( 7. Pressure :/ 8. Itch :O 9.Thermoception: Ability to sense heat and cold :S 10.Proprioception: This sense gives you the ability to tell where your body parts are. 11.Coordination. :/ 12. Nociception: In a word, pain. This was once thought to simply be the result of overloading other senses, such as “touch”, but this has been found not to be the case and instead, it is its own unique sensory system. There are three distinct types of pain receptors: cutaneous (skin), somatic (bones and joints), and visceral (body organs). Moral Man the Friendly arsonist, motherpounder: I SHALL GLADLY HELP YOU UNLEASH YOUR 12th SENSE TO ITS FULLEST DEGREE!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A man walks into a bar and sees a man with a big orange head. The man asks the bartender, "Why does that guy have a big orange head?" The bartender replies," If you buy him a beer, maybe he'll tell you." So the man buys a beer and gives it to the man with the big orange head and asks why he has a big orange head. The man says, "One day I found a genie and my first wish was to be the richest man in the world, my second wish was to be married to the most beautiful woman in the world, and for my third wish, I told the genie,'Ya know, why don't you give me a big orange head."

thumb_up thumb_down -8

You're walking down a street and you see a man struggling to open a door, what do you do? Whatever you feel like doing.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

thumb_up thumb_down -8

why did the girl chug her tub of frosting? she had no spoon

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you get when you reverse Zelda's Lullaby ? Skyward Sword's theme.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

A baby seal walks into a club. :|

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Roses are red, Violets are blue, MAKE ME EAT LEMONS, I ATE U!

thumb_up thumb_down -8

djkldfnblfnbofgb

thumb_up thumb_down -8

whos on the right track? lady gaga

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What do you get when someone tells you an anti joke? An anti joke.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

what happens when chuck norris loses his hokey-bar? your mother

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops