what’s worse than 12 dead babies in one trash can? one dead baby in 12 trash cans

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Your mumma is so fat that she wears large clothes.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I have existed for over 6000 years and around vi0lating people long before you where ever born kid... You do not believe me you say? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: You do not believe me? According to this DNA test... Welcome to papa son/daughter... Its time to make you a man/woman now, and then TIME TO MAKE YOU my BlTCH!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

thumb_up thumb_down +6

whats the stage after cancer? you die

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did Zeus say to Hades? Nothing. Both are mythological beings created by the Greek civilization to explain why many things in the world happened, mostly because of a lack of modern science.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What happens when a plane with 2500 people on board crashes? There were only 165 seats.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Two Chav's jump off a cliff who wins? Neither, the affects of gravity are equal despite the weight of said object.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did Timmy's mom think of his art project? Nothing, she screamed and called an ambulance because she saw that he had tripped and fallin onto a pair of scissors and they just so happened to peirce his heart.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the boy fail the math test? He has a learning disability.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a man with a spade stuck in his head? An ambulance, he may be in need of urgent medical assistance

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why do black people eat Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because there is Protein in chicken and without protein their bodies would succumb to such diseases as Kwashiorkor and Cachexia.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's upside down? umop apisdn

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops