What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus is? Trying not to laugh.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck had AIDS?

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. One of them says, "Man, it sure is hot in here." and the other muffin replies, "Yep." They later die a horrid and painful death as their flesh gets burned into a nice golden brown crisp.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

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An alcoholic walks into a bar.... I forgot the rest of the joke but your mother is a prostitute.

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The President walks into a local pub. Everyone shits their fricken pants because the President is here.

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where was Billy during the bomb? Every where

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

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roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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A: That's a catchy song! B: You know what else is catchy? A: What? :) B: Herpes. Awkward silence.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Screwing in a lightbulb is a simple, menial task, and the fact that the man was a Jew is irrelevant.

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Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

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My black friend love grape soda and koolaid, with his fried chicken, and i dont think its racist cuz i also enjoy the same things at times

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Why did the student fail his test? He forget to study for it the night before.

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What's 1+1? 69.

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what do michael Jackson and little boys do in the dark alone? they turn on the flashlight

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CJISTHEBEST Sticks and stones may break my bones because i have osteoperosis.

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What do you call a black man with big cuts on his arms? You call an ambulance to help him!

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What did the fruit say when it was about to be sliced in half? Nothing, fruits cannot talk, duh.

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wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

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really? are people insistantly so totally stupid? Now read that again and you may notice something. :P

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What happened when Glen jumped off a building? The rope snapped his neck. He died.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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