What worse than seeing a worm in your apple? Half a worm in your apple.

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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Roses are Blue Violets are Red Watermelons are green Refridgerator

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What did dyslexic Old McDonald say? . . . I have a learning disability that impairs my fluency and comprehension accuracy in being able to read and spell

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What did a Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know, I don't speak Chinese.

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A white man and a drunken black man enters the bar, the bartender calls the cop and the black man is dragged into the police car. The black man screams YOU ARE RACIST! YOU DAMN RACISTS! The cops tell him he has been walking around the streets naked the last 2 days... Oooh... I am really sorry sir says the black man. He was forgiven and went sober forever. Moral: No moral, that is the anti moral in this anti joke...and besides I am a W class celebrity.enjoy life

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Why didn't Hellen Keller scream when she fell off a cliff? She was wearing Mittens

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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A black and a white man walk into a grocery store the black man buys fried chicken and the white man buys vegtables. The men both have different opions and enjoy different food groups.

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what is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a cadilac. a cadilac is something i want

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What has two legs but can't walk A paraplegic

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My mom told me and my brother to lean up on a commercial...we were watching netflix

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What has four wheels and flies? A flying car.

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what is the differnce between my truck and chuck norris? i eat my own poop.

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Why did I deleted brian from my friend list ? Cuz he had brain tumor.

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What can fit between breasts? Is long? And gets hard when you jerk it? A seatbelt.

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What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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A depressed man walks into a bar. He has a drink and heads back to his apartment. On the way he was killed by another man attempting to commit suicide due to depression.

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Knock knock Who's there? Nobody Oh, ok

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A man walks into a bar, he then proceeds to purchase his favorite alcoholic beverage.

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Q: Whats metal and shiny? A: You're lame childhood accomplishments.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being brutally murdered as you are watching your guts spilling out of your body

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Sigh, everybody in the world hates me :( Moral: Seven billion people? Realy?

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What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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