Why do ducks have flat feet? To stomp out forest fires Why do elephants have flat feet? To stomp out flaming ducks

A man finds an antique lamp at a garage sale. He takes it home and polishes it, and a majestic genie materializes. The genie thanks the man for freeing him from excruciating slavery, shakes his hand, and returns home to his overjoyed family.

Why did the blonde girl drink lots of water? Because the fat comments got to her and she changed her diet to nothing but water

Two men enter a room. Two men and a baby leave the room...

How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

what has 911 got in commen with most bank robberies? all r inside jobs

I was very thirsty so I decided to go get some soda.Upon reaching the soda store I discovered a very long line. I decided to leave the line and instead get some milk, unfortunately once again there was a long line at the milk store. Discouraged by still thirsty I decided to try to luck at the punch store. There was a long line there also.

Why did the chicken fall down? Because it wanted to have fun

Why does the man have mayonaise in his pants? A: I don't know, I was hoping you could tell me.

What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

What did the boyfriend ask his girlfriend for on his birthday? Pokemon Yellow version.

What's worse than having a FUPA? The Holocaust

What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

There was a chicken. It squarked.

You haven't happened to see a cigarette truck around here have you? What's a truck?

Read a Book.

Knock knock... Home invasion

What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I masturbate ?_?

Two black guys walk into a bar. One of them was white.

Two elephants were in a bathtub. One elephant asks the other "pass the soap?" The other elephant passes him the soap and they continue with their bath.

A black man is driving down the road in a van, and pulls up to a little a girl and says excuse me Miss. The girl replies Ok Ok I will get the car just dont hurt me The black guy says I dont want you to get in my van im taking your mom on a date.

what did your mom say to you? go fuck your self you stupid greedy shit. you start crying later in your bedroom, then your mom comes with a bag full of your fathers semen, and dildos. and forces you to drink the entire bag.

Why did the little girl fall of the swing? Because she had no arms.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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