The Dali Lama walks into a pizza parlor and asks the owner to make him one with everything. After 20 minutes or so the owner brings the Dali Lama a pizza with every available topping. After he finished eating the Dali Lama thanked the owner and left a nice tip.

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Nope, Chuck Testa.

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Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

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Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

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Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

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Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

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if you are reading this your wasting your time

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, He cracked his skull and died on impact. He will be missed.

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I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

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This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

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What's worse than a wet sock? Being molested as a child.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Being a chicken, it had no concept of roads or their dangers and was simply trying to find some feed.

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Persond A: A guy blows himself and his family up with a hand grenade Person B: HEY!!! Thats not funny thats how my family died

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what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

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Your mother is so dumb, that she had a very poor ACT composite score.

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how do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

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A Black man, and Jewish man, and a Asian man walk into a bar. They then proceed to buy a drink, leave the bar, and move on with their day.

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roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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Knock Knock Who's there? After no response, the man chuckled as he realized the sound of his TV mimicked that of his door knocker.

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Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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