- Anti Joke

Why did the man ask the woman on a date? They were both single and looking for a unique, romantic experience that could possibly turn into a long-term loving relationship.

What happened to the boy who ate too much? He got type 2 diabetes

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

Roses r Red Violets r Blue I'm schizophrenic So am i too!

Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

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What did the vampire use to make tea? Hot water, a kettle, and some nice green tea leaves given to him by his great uncle for kwanza.

I'm attracted to you like the earth is attracted to the sun. With a force that is inversely proportional to the distance squared.

Why did blonde cross the road? She needed to get to work.

whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? - The boy scout comes home from camp.

Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

Why did the black man cross the road? To escape from his owner.

Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

Why do people who walk into bars never have names?

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. It is a coincidence that none of them have the same hair colour.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 8, 9, 10

What's the difference between a ball and a bouncy ball? A bouncy ball is bouncy.

What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

Johnny: I saw you long time ago. You were quite the school clown back in the day. Boy I remember back when I was just a whipper snapper we used play around and goof around all day. Whatdya think? Richard: Shut up, motherfuckingbitch

What happed when the homeless shelter went out of business? -Everyone went hungry and died.

You wanna pop a bottle? I hope you are referring to bottles of water as I am underage and I refuse to partake in any said consumption of alcoholic beverages

What's difficult and tedious to do? Trying to find a joke with 0 thumbs up/down -Sykes

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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