What did the 12 year old boy get for Christmas? Herpes

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Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

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A young boy walked in on his mom and dad in their room lastnight They were having a leisurely evening playing scrabble

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A duck walks into a convient store and ask the cashier, "You got any bread?". The cashier immediatley responds, "No sorry, we don't sell bread." The next day the duck comes back and asks the same cashier, "You got any bread?" The cashier sighs and responds, "No, we still have no bread." After browsing for about three minutes the duck comes back and asks, "You have any bread?" The cashier, as pissed off as a beached whale, says, "NO! WE WILL NEVER GET ANY FRICKEN BREAD AND IF YOU ASK AGAIN I'LL NAIL YOUR BEAK TO THIS COUNTER!" The duck sways his head and looks to the ground, only to look right back at the cashier and ask, "You got any nails." The cashier says, "No." The duck comes back and says, "You got any bread?"

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Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

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KNOK KNOK WHOES THERE APPLE APPLE WHO SEE THIS IS Y U BROKE UP

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What's funnier than 24? 9/11

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What isyellow and can't swim? a bulldozer

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Why did the asian man crash? He fell asleep after a long 18 hour day of driving, plus he was listening to soothing soul music.

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How many black people does it take to tar a roof? Just one. Unless he wants to do it in a shorter amount of time and calls a few friends to help him.

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why couldnt the jew play basketball? He was handicapp

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Two muffins are in an oven. They say absolutely nothing because they're muffins and not sentient.

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What do you call a girl with an iq of 13 Dead

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Roses are red My name is Dave This poem doesn't make sense Potato

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What is a black person's favorite color? There are many different colors and it would be unrealistic to believe that all the people of a single race would choose the same one as their favorite.

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What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

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A horse walks into a bar. The horse says "why the short face?"

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Roses are red, Grass is greener, When I think about you, I play with my weiner

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? An X-box, a sweater and some socks.

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A guy punched himself. He then said ouch.

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What did Helen Keller say? Obcojbcidjbcidjbdijcbd

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Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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What do you call a seedless pumpkin? A pumpkin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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