What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the man kill his friend? How am I supposed to know

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is the difference between my pet goldfish and an african village? My pet goldfish has water.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a giraffe driving a car? A danger to society.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q. What's yellow and looks like a duck? A. a baby duck

thumb_up thumb_down +21

a. why? b. because I wanted

thumb_up thumb_down +21

A black man goes outside to shoot some hoops. He misses all of them because not all blacks are good at basketball.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What does an Asian person with 3 eyes have? A birth defect.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What's better than winning a million dollars? Winning 2 million dollars!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

what did the cat say to the potato? meow

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What long black and tasty? Licorice

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A man walks into a bar. He walks out again remembering he forgot his wallet.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops