What do you call an old lady walking down the street? Widowed.

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Malcom: Knock Knock. Jessica: Who's there? Malcom: It's Malcom. Jessica: Okay. Come in.

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what did the red rock say to the blue rock? Nothing. Rocks can't talk.

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No, but I am not just an author, the important thing is, that this kid has been stopped as we speak, as I said he was selling information to several clients on the deep web, and patterns do reveal that he was selling you out piece by piece while prepared to make a run for it once he delivered the vital details. Say, did you promote this guy a bit too fast or something? Either he knows as much as you do, or otherwise he has been learning the ins and outs of your little place pretty fast.

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What did the child say after the priest touched him? Thank you for the ashes Father, have a blessed Lenten season.

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What's the difference between a black man and a gorilla? One is a black man and the other is a gorilla.

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Why was the girl so stupid? She had mental retardation caused my Down Syndrome.

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John: what is blue and goes blub blub Phil; I don't know, what? John: a blue blub blub. What is green and goes blub blub Phil; a green blub blub John: no green blub blubs don't exist, what are you stupid?

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Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

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Q. Why did the blonde die drinking milk? A. she was shot in the head by a 22.

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What did thirty starving Jews fight for on the train ride to Birkenau? A crumb. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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which is faster a) ferrari b) beetle a ferrari

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Sally has no arms. A: Knock kock? B: Whose there? Not Sally.

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Your mama was so fat that when she did the splits she gave the floor a hickey

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What did your mom get for christmas ? A stairstepper.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Life on the line? I just do it for the kill and the potential savage rape and consumption! And yeah, a man is not a man but a boy if he cant protect his lady friends. HEY WAIT A FUCKING MOMENT! Why you playing so hard to get now? YOUR FLESH IS MINE! It is just like a billion pages ago where we where talking VERY down and dirty.

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What is brown, white, and red all over? A part asian part white guy covered in blood after having her girlfriend have her period while they were having sex in a club in alaska near a military school that was abandoned and is now haunted but justin bieber took care of that.

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Most adults can swim. Current government studies are investigating similar skills in babies. With unnecessarily large pools.

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why did the snow man die? Actually it is impossible because it was an inanimate object.

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So theres a Black guy, White guy and Mexican guy all sitting at a bar. They were friends.

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that awkward moment when there is no candy in the van.....

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A man is at the doctor's office and the doctor says to the man: "I'm sorry sir, you have AIDS and Alzheimer's disease." The man says: "Well, at least I don't have AIDS!"

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Old, Asian, Woman who drive

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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