In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

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Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

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If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

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whats brown and half eaten? yeah an easter egg that a parent has given to there son/daughter before dinner

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What is faster? A bottle of milk or a sand-filled pin ball machine? A fighter jet, stupid!

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the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

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One night, a man dreams that he is a bird that can fly into outer space. The next day the man finds out that his son is a homosexual.

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Why didn't gram-pa give his grandson a Birthday present? Because he had Alzheimer's and forgot about him.

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There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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What's big and messy? A big mess

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I f*cked your mom last night and she liked it. 8====D~~~~

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What do you do when you have a baby and your being shot by a terrorist. You use the baby as a shield.

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what do you call a million black people on the moon? a good start

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why did the boy fall off his bike? because his mum through a fridge at him

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What did casey anthony say when the ruled her as not guilty? "yay"

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Listen Nero, you are the only one I suspect right now, how do you know all of this? Why should I believe you?!

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two guys r talking and the one said *i swear to god* and the other one said *u swear what to god what the hell r u talking about i dont even know u*

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What's better than being rich? Not living in Kenya.

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a dog jumping up and catching a frisbi

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Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

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what did the jew say to the other jew in WWII?..... "We're both going to die."

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the awkward moment when you kill everyone in school and blame it on the fat kid

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How do you catch a Jew? Just give him a little shower ;)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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