Uh... Justin, the most pointless man... I gotta cringe for a moment, I don't want to be mean here, but I think my body cell total opinion pool dropped a large quantity there, its not that I do not want you anymore, but, my body`s mass body cell total is kinda denying me... Actually I am denying IT... ACTUALLY WE ARE DENYING EACH OTHER, (which is totally awesome, united denial fighting against one another FOR DENYING THE MOST! BECAUSE COOPERATION IS FOR PUSSIES!) Anyway, hell I am dead tired, oh yeah, Justin... Man, Uh, who where you again?

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jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

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Q. Why hasn't LeBron won a ring? A. Throughout his career, he has been placed with incapable teammates, thus leading to unsuccessful results. However, recently, he has been placed with individuals valid pod achieving such a goal.

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There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

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why does my face bleeding theres an axe in it

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Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

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How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

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What did the Mexican shoe salesman say to the man? Excuse me, do you whih way to main street?

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Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

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What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

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What do you call a dead guy under the ocean? Murder.

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your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you are just a figment of my imagination.

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what did hayley say to missy last night? I'm tired bye

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

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what's inflation? a hollow cost.

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what did the little girl with no legs and no arms get for christmas? Cancer

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Whats white, fat, and looks like a horse? An albino horse who apparently has a high chance of diabetes.

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"the president is black, my lambo's blue..." no hes not, hes bi-racial.

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Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

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Why was the little girl crying Someone therew a dump truck at her

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What did the black man say after he swallowed the bicycle? He didn't say anything. Swallowing a bicycle is physically impossible.

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What Sound does a baby make in a blender? I don't know I'm to busy masturbating to it

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Why did the piece of gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken's foot.

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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