What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

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A blonde takes a math test it says find x? She circles x and puts there it is!

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why didnt jane scream when she got robbed? Because she got shot.

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what do you call cheese that isn't yours? not your cheese, you probably stole it.

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How do you take a picture of a man with a wooden leg? You can't take pictures with wooden legs.

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What's the same between a grape and an airplane? they both have wings but the grape doesn't

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A Jew walks into a bar and says drinks are on me.

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This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

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did you hear the joke about the vagina ....... you'll never get it

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knock knock! who's there? Jim Jim who? Jim Goldenbach

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Knock knock. After 1 and a half minutes of waiting, Phil assumes his friend is not home, and promptly leaves.

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what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

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whats brown and sticky? Doody

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

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What was the black kid carrying when he was running down your street? His television set

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I think everybody should have a penis.

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Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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Nero, listen, do not try to imply that you created the Iron man method, that was developed by many people over the duration of many years in the former underground society. You seem far too educated to be the savage you claim to be, if I told you that our people will do the uttermost to see if we can fix that eye of yours and succeed, will you forgive my failure and imperfections as a leader? Look at it this way, I am a leader, not a ruler, what my followers do is up to them, but if they cannot understand that they have to pay the consequences behind their actions, they have no place within the order, as for the expression "my order" it is simply what my many followers like for me to say, not because they are unwilling to take responsibility, but as a token of praise. Our articulations and means of expressing desire and such are very much the same, have you ever been part of our order?

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

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What did the rich white student to the poor arabian teacher? good morning Mr.Stevenson.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go home and beat his wife

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two men where hunting one man shot a deer and ate it, the other man shot the man who killed the deer and made human steaks. a day later he killed his family. and ate them with his dog. he then grabbed the deer that was left in his fridge and used it to make a fire.

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Why do the Chinese eat cats? Because it is a good source of protein that is relatively easy to obtain. Really, it's not much different than killing pigs for food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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