Knock knock Who's there? It's me It's me who? It's me who is knocking the door

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A black man walks into a store with a gun. It is a gun store and he needs to buy amunition after using all of his to fend of a home invader, and protect his family. He lives in a bad area because he never went to college and cannot get a well paying job in this economy, so he can't afford to buy a house in a better area He then used the gun to rob a bank. He no longer lives in a poor area

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A man falls out of a boat. What happens next? Well, you would think he'd know how to swim, but due to his alzheimer's he didn't, so he drowned.

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Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

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Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

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Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

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Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

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what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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A man walks into a bar with a chicken on his head the bartender asks the man why do you have a chicken on your head the man replies the chicken is thirsty

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You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

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What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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Dude man, I'm high...

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

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Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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CALLER: Is your refrigerator running? OWNER: Yes, it's working just fine.

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Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

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It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

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What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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