Why did the jew go to the doctors? Because he had a severe headache.

What did the little boy say to a stranger? Nothing. He is very shy, and his parents always said to never talk to strangers.

What's black and white and red all over. Nothing, that's a contradiction.

What happened to the boy who ate too much? He got type 2 diabetes

Why did the black man wash his feet? PHOIT!!!! He washed his feet in a bird bath... Too bad his car got thrown off a cliff by a bald eagle with no feathers?

I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.

Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

How many theropists does it take to change a lightbulb? -only one, but it takes a very long time and the lightbulb has to want to change.

Q: What do you call a person with no arms and no legs ??? A: Stumpy

what's 2 + 2 ? 4, unless you add it up wrong.

what did the chickpea say to the raison when he got called big but? Atleast i dont have a stick up my but.

If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

How are a chicken and a grape similar? They're both round. Except the chicken.

Why did the black man have a gun in his hand? He was crossing through a dangerous neighborhood and was offering protection to himself and his family.

Did you know: it is scientifically proven that people who have more birthdays live longer

why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

A buddhist walks up to a hotdog stand asks the server to make him one with everything

You know what he said? How did you know what he said?

I sas Ratzinger a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

knock knock who's there i am dead i am dead who i am just dead u idiot!!!!!

what did the leprosy survivor get for christmas a amputation

What did the vampire use to make tea? Hot water, a kettle, and some nice green tea leaves given to him by his great uncle for kwanza.

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

Q. How do you know when you've had too much too drink? A. Your dead(No because when your dead you can't think.)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...