Why'd the blonde jump out the window? To kill herself

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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Why do the Chinese eat cats? Because it is a good source of protein that is relatively easy to obtain. Really, it's not much different than killing pigs for food.

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Knock, knock. You do realize you can actually physically knock on the door instead of just imitating the sound effect with your mouth, right? It's actually way more effective that way. Just saying, since it's raining outside and you're cold and want to come in...

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Why did the jew cross the road Because he was being cornered by 10 nazis that had automatic guns

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? having your titties super glued to a triceritops' as cheeks while the triceritops has chronic diahrea

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You know what makes me smile? Facial muscles.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

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How old are you? 7

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What's faster than a Nascar Racecar? My thoughts. -Juanita

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What has four wheels and flies? A flying car.

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why are crocodiles so angry? because they have a lot of teeth but no tooth brush?

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Why didn't the man go to the movies?? Because he likes pie.

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what happens when you try to believe it's not butter? 34 Indonesian kids lose their job.

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What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

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How many electricians with a suitable ladder does it take to change a bulb? If the bulb fitting is now obsolete it may not be possible.

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Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

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roses are red, hills are green. i know you're ugly and i know I'm so mean.

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What's the difference between Colonel Sanders and a barrel of olives? Colonel Sanders isn't in a barrel.

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why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

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What do you call man with no limbs or a head? Your neighbor.

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Most adults can swim. Current government studies are investigating similar skills in babies. With unnecessarily large pools.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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