my own dog bit my penis off, it was then put down. it was the worst day of my life.

Why did the chiken cross the road? It didn't, J-walking is against the law.

What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? Velcro.

Your momma's so fat she has a hard time finding clothes to fit

What do you call it when a cigarette is brown instead of white? A cigarette that is or has been damp so that the nicotine was able to bleed into the paper and dye it.

A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

What has four legs in the morning, two legs at noon, and three legs at night? An experimental animal mutilated then exposed to radiation.

What do you get if you convict a white man of murder? A black man in prison.

What did the orphan get for christmas? Cancer.

A Higgs Boson walks into a church, and the priest says, "We don't allow Higgs Boson's in here," and the Higgs Boson says, "But I thought Christianity promised acceptance to everyone who believes."

Why was the prostitute's throat sore? Allergies.

roses are red violents are blue your dad is gay soon it all be you !

Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

what did the guy say when he lost his sandwich? wheres my sandwich?

Yo mommas so stupid, she has a slightly below average IQ.

Two peanuts were walking down the road. One was assaulted because they were walking in Detroit.

what do you call a dumb blonde with no arms? Her name because she will not respond to anything else

You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

What did the black man say to the white man when the white man was drunk and naked on the roof dancing? Quit fucking around Brad and get off my roof or I'm calling the police because this is the third time this month.

Hamsters are a lot like cigarettes. They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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