why was the fat man excercizing? because he was a fatass and no one liked him

There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

What did they do with the drunken sailor? Gave him the sack, which meant he could no longer provide for his family.

A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

Why didn't Jimmy do well at school? Because he was recently in a car accident, which severely damaged his brain, making it difficult for him to learn things, because of his severely damaged brain, which he got in a car accident, which he was recently involved in.

Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

what does STFU stand for? the southern tenant farmers union.

I recently found out I have aids just kiddin heres the real joke... I recenly found out that Philidelphia means "City of Brotherly Love" and I said so do people in philly say its always free hug day in Phillipd fun house in philly?

What does a cookie and the twin towers have in common? They both crumble.

What did the computer say to the mouse? Nothing inanimate objects cant talk

How do you find a jew amoung italians? Through a dollar and see which one whines its not enough!

What do you call an overly-sexual, chewbacca-like creature that smokes cocaine and shoots heroin, while beating its offspring? Mom.

What's the difference between a pile of rotting shit about to be re-heated in the microwave and Kevin James's new movie "The Zookeeper" ... Nothing.

Why can't Helen Keller drive a train? Because she's blind.

Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

why does it take 2 woman with p.m.t to change a light bulb? because there both tired , feel bloated , and could do with a bar of choccy

You know what's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile where one's alive in the middle, and has to eat his way out.

Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

Sally bought a shakeweight. She is an alcoholic and is ruining her family.

whats red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

what's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a trampoline? obviously quite a lot due to the fact that they are two completely different ideas with little to no relation to each other.

A blind man is jumped and doesn't see it coming

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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