Q: why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: He had no arms Q: Why couldn't he get up? A: He died when he hit the ground

A blonde walked into a hair salon. She got her hair dyed black, as she is sick and tired of jokes that scrutinize those with blonde hair.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A pogo stick. Just kidding. Cancer.

Yo mama's so fat, she died of a mixture of obesity and type 1 diabetes.

Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

Q: Why did Katie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock, Knock Who's There? Not Katie.

A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

Yo mama's so fat she threw a rock at the ground and missed.

A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink, then walks out of the bar.

Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

A black person goes up to the drive through at popeye's, what did they say? Nothing, it was closed.

What's stupid a light bulb.

Why do midgets laugh when they run? The grass tickles their balls.

What's brown,green got four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill you? A snooker table.

What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be. He could not be. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. He's either in great danger or has a psychological disorder.

Why isn't the dog a rebublican? Because it's a dog.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

why did the pyromaniac burn down the house? because he is a pyronaniac, he derives pleasure from burning things.

johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

what’s worse than 12 dead babies in one trash can? one dead baby in 12 trash cans

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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