There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

If I said you had a beautiful body would you stop asking me if those jeans make you look fat?

Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

PATIENT: Doctor, doctor, I can't see my legs DOCTOR: That's because you're blind

how do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? it doesn't matter. she can't climb up a tree with only one arm.

I once was told that life is like a box of chocolates, but then realized that it wasn't

Where do you go when you find a fork in the road? To the nearest restaurant.

My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

what did the first fire hi-grin say to the second fire hi-grin nothing they can talk it what just really awkward.

Yo Mama's so fat that she is at risk for diabetes

A dog was dying on the side of the road. I drove 50 meters ahead and saw it again. I was on shrooms.

why did susie fall off the dollar coaster? it only cost 50 cents susie is gone now

a woman walks into a bar, she was quickly kicked out and escorted back to the kitchen

Q: Why did the boy fall off his bicycle? A: Because someone threw a fridge at him.

What do you call an orange fruit? An Orange.

Why did hundreds ofnpeople die in a plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad.

A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

What is an offensive way to refer to black people from the time of the Flint Stones? Niggers

Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

Allah walked into AK Bar

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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