Johnny fell out of the window. Except he didn't fall I pushed him

What is the difference between a Mexican and an a pile of crap? One is disgusting and unsanitary and the other is a pile of crap.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was an attempted suicide. His family left him, he had been in and out of rehab for a terrible cocaine addiction for over ten years, and was still having nightmares about his abusive past.

what’s worse than 12 dead babies in one trash can? one dead baby in 12 trash cans

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

What do you call a horse with a missing leg Calling it names could be considered animal abuse and should be reported immediately

how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

A man walks into a bar a bartender says, 'why the long face'? the man says 'I just walked into a bar'!!!

Betty wanted to see time fly so she threw her alarm clock out the window. Shortly after, her mother grounded her as it was quite expensive and she had become less punctual without it.

A Priest a Rabbi and a duck walk into a bar. The rest of the patrons continue to drink until the situation seems less strange.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

What did the muslim do at the airport? He bought a ticket to New York and proceeded to fly there to mourn his brother who was killed during the terrorist attacks on 9/11.

why did Sarah fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? not sarah

What's better than your first Hanukkah? Not being a Jew.

What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

Women, "Did just pinch my ass!?" Man, "Yes." Women, "Oh, alright then."

knock knock Goodbye

Burp

"knock knock" "who's there" "Chuck" "Get out of here Chuck I hate you!"

roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

What's worse than burning your tongue drinking hot chocolate? Being shanked by a homeless man.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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