Fred: Hey man where were you last night. Steve: Why don't yo ask yo mama.

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My spelling is horrible

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I'm so stupid that I'm posting on Anti Jokes!

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are taking a chemistry exam. They each get a solid B on the test.

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Neo Nero, why did you not tell me that Nero7 is dead? When was the funeral held? Where is he buried? At point Zero? Please I need to know, he was basically my father, or rather all that my father never was, at least I dont have to wonder if he will ever come back... I understand your anger, even if I am not even close to following your extreme ideals, please tell me the code, the proof that you are not one of the Spetznas or the Nazi`s. "Eliza"

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Michael walked into a bar, The rest of the bar initially erupted with laughter until the his carer made everybody aware that Michael suffered from brittle bones and that he had actually fractured his hip after colliding with the bar. People then understood the gravity situation as the bartender immediately dialled the emergency services. Michael managed to recover physically from the accident but to this day he is still scarred from the laughter aimed at him the night of his accident and is too afraid to return to the bar again in fear of being mocked despite the misunderstanding of the situation.

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What did dyslexic Old McDonald say? . . . I have a learning disability that impairs my fluency and comprehension accuracy in being able to read and spell

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

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a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

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How did the American man get the Mexican man to jump over the wall? He didn't, after several attempts he then got a ladder and climbed over.

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roses are red violets should be purple

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being brutally murdered as you are watching your guts spilling out of your body

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Why did the Mexican mow the lawn? The grass was getting to high and needed to be trimmed.

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Why did the chicken cross the road...

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What happens when a drunk driver meets a stoned driver? A head on collision

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what do you say when your phone is broken? A: my phone is broken

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Why did Sally fly off the swing, She had no arms Knock knock *Who's there* Not Sally

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Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

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What's the difference between an orange? Two typewriters, because vests don't have sleeves.

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why do black people like lotion? because everybody else does.

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What's the difference between a bench and a black guy? A bench can support a family

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nobody move! I've dropped my brain.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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