when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

what has 2 legs and red all over half a cat.

Whats the worst thing about dying? Your not alive anymore.

why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

You go to the Anti Joke website, what do you find under the "newest" section? Black jokes.

What did one ginger say to the other? W are both gingers.

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

What is square, brown, and smells funny? A box with a dead body in it.

What's worse than a rapist? 2 rapists

A jew walked out of a bar then goes to the other bar across the street then walks out from the back door to go to another bar The Actions of this jew tells us that there are only 3 bars in the zone and one pet shop

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a screaming goat

I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? Boyscouts came back from camp

roses are red, violets are blue. sunflowers are yellow, i bet you were expecting something romantic but no this is just gardening facts.

- Knock, knock. -- How many dead babies does it take to cross the street and walk into a bar? - That's an odd question to ask to a visitor. -- Your mom.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

What's worse then the bomb that went off in boston? The second one right after.

A guy walks into a bar. He meets a girl and they have a great time. He calls her the next day and their relationship continues for many months. Eventually they get married and have children.

Who won the race between the turtle and the hare? Well, odds are the two creatures wouldn't race given that animals do not speak. However, if they were, the hare would most likely win a land race because of its powerful legs and agility. However, if the turtle happened to be a seaturtle and the race took place underwater, our dear little beloved turtle would win, having the advantage over the rabbit.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...