You know what's funny with rape? Nothing. It's horror.

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I'm Polish.

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Why did the little girl drop her balloon? Because she was getting raped in the face.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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a cat and a duck walk into a pub. the cat enters first and says for the duck to put all of their drinks on his bill. the duck(being a duck)says nothing because ducks cannot speak. therefore the cat shouldnt have been speaking either.

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Q. How many black people does it take to change a lightbulb? A. Who knows? It's dark!

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An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless your father is a doctor and you live with him.

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Yo momma so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook. Chins in a phonebook? I don't get it.

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whats the hardest answer ever? The one without a question.

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A horse walks into a bar You have been reading so many anti jokes that you can actually anticipate the anti-joke punchline to this joke, because it is one of maybe 3 or 4.

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Q:Why is rugby one of the safest sports to play? A: It isn't , it is in fact very dangerous.

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How did the thief acquire a lamborghini? He has a side job as a lamborghini salesman.

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Why wouldn't Helen Keller be able to drive if she was alive today? She would be inside her coffin not knowing how to get out

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Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven threatened to kill him and his family.

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When does Adolf Hitler get horny? When his hormones start at it when looking at women.

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:)Knock Knock :(Whose's there? :)None ya :(None ya who? :)None ya dam business.

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What's more disturbing than finding an apple in your worm? The fact that you're eating a worm.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like peanut butter Can you fly?

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your face is so ugly it belongs in a zoo, but dont be sad, i forgot the rest, so you wont feel really bad. I need a rhyme, treasure chest.

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Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

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Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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