It's bright in here *puts on? sunglasses* Ahhh, that's better...

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

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why does clive keep getting crunk? because no girl satisfies him as much as geros

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Your momma so fat.... She's at risk of cardiovascular disease. You should take her to a nutritionist.

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Knock knock Who's there? *silence* WHO'S THERE? *silence* -Looks out window- Slenderman

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Superman and Batman get in a fight, who wins? No one the world has just lost a superhero.

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See what I did here? ;) Ladies, I just need some space okay? Damn Space Invaders... Ijustmetthespaceinvaderstheytookmyspace << DOUBLE MEANING!

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a blonde takes 1 hour to swim 100m of breaststroke.

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what does STFU stand for? the southern tenant farmers union.

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We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

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Why did the donkey cross the road? To get to your house. Knock Knock. Who's there? Heehaw!

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what happens when u fall down the stairs? you break your arm.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken is now getting flowers for her dead children that got hit buy multiple cars, also the chicken is a human mother.

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Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well he graduated in four years with a degree in chemical engineering. He worked hard all four years in order to keep his scholarship to the university. Now he leads a very successful life and lives in a large house with his wife and two children.

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Q: Why did the black man run from the chainsaw? A: Someone was trying to kill him with it.

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How do you post a Tasmanian devil? Recorded Delivery

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why was the girl eating a pie , because she were hungry

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a man walks into a bar, when he leaves he thinks he can hold his liquor and kills a mother and two children attempting to drive home.

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Girl, why are you crying? I'm not a girl, I'm a strawberry.

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What the difference between a ferarri and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a pile of dead babies in my garage. That would be murder.

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What smells like diarrhea and looks like poop? A rotten banana.

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whats the difference between a phone and Helen Keller? you listen to the phone and you smash Helen Keller on the head with a spiked baseball bat

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? The pizza does not scream in the oven

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops