My dad calls me a son of a bitch and I'm like "hey! You married her"

Why is the sky blue? You like men.

What did the monkey say to the newlywed couple? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

Haikus usually make sense, but sometimes they don't refrigerator.

roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

Nock Nock Whose there? Your mom. Stop locking your door.

How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

Why did the black man die? Kidney Failure.

A young baby died.

A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

How do my feet smell? Oh wait. They can't. Feet are not sentient independent beings and therefore cannot experience the five senses, including smell.

What happens when you throw a red rock into a blue ocean. The rock gets wet.

Where's the soap?

Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

A bomb went off in japan where did sally go Everywhere

What do you call a group of black people in a lamboghini..... Unlikely

A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

Why did the Indian have a hard time getting a hotel room? He didn't. He owned the hotel.

why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...