Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

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What more orange that a lime? Most things.

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Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

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When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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Why did Sally fly off the swing, She had no arms Knock knock *Who's there* Not Sally

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because pterodactyls along with all other dinosaurs have been extinct for millions of years.

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How many beavers does it take to paint a house blue? 0, beavers cant paint.

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What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No.. Neither have they.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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Fred: Hey man where were you last night. Steve: Why don't yo ask yo mama.

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My spelling is horrible

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Have you seen Stevie Wanders new house? No. Neither has he.

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why are crocodiles so angry? because they have a lot of teeth but no tooth brush?

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Why did the dead chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was dead.

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what did the blind, deaf, paraplegic child get for christmas? other than cancer, nothing.

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Why was the man foolish for buying a new lamp? Because he lived in a small shack with no electricity and was probably going to die soon.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey has a very weak cerrebellum.

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Whats worse than getting broken into by a robber? Looking at Obama

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What's hot and cold at the same time? Hotcold.

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Tod:Hey Rick wanna hear a joke?Rick:No.

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Why was it sad for black guys drove off a cliff? There two more seats

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What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops