a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

Knock Knock Hold on Im pooping.

What did the indian boy say to his friend? He didn't he was too busy studying

Why Tom is Gay ? Because brocoly didnt eat a mashroom .

I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

What do a chicken and a grape have in comon? - They're both purple, except for the chicken.

Sharing means caring, Caring is socialism

- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A pogo stick. Just kidding. Cancer.

I see London, I see France. Wow! This high-speed train that travels across Europe is amazing!

Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

There were three men walking across the road and it started to rain

what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

One man asked another man what his favorite sport was. The man replied: " My favorite sport is golf." "Golf requires no physical strength, therefore I do not count it as a sport." Said the man who asked the question.

why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

What happened to the kids bike? It broke when he got hit by a bus

how do you confuse a blonde do nothing

why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side. wow i missed the entire purpose of this.

Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

What's better than your first Hanukkah? Not being a Jew.

the teacher enters the room she sits in her chair and yells, "i am your substitute teacher. get out your books and write me a story."

Why was a black man in a prison cell? He was a highly respected plumber fixing a prisoner's faulty toilet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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