How do you kill Justin Beiber? By stabbing him 38 times in the chest.

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What's the difference between an apple and a black person? Well theres a huge difference but they both taste good in peanutbutter

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woman's rights

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Jack and Jill went up the hill....Just kidding, it was only Jill. Jack had no legs

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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How can you get a handicap black man to walk again? You don't...... Unless you motivate him with fried chicken. Anti-anti-joke!

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whats black with purple?nothing no animals or humans have anything like that

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How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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how much fish could a chicken

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I have a friend named Dave, he lost his ID and now we call mim Dav

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What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a wall? Ripping them off.

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Why did Hitler shoot himself? Because he found out Chuck Norris was a Jew.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its babies were being mauled by a cat.

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What starts with f and ends in u-c-k? a:****

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't.

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Yo mama so fat when she dresses in red she looks like clifford the big red dog!

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Why does it get hot after a basketball game? Because of the crowd all breathing out carbon dioxide and the high level of activity generating excess body heat.

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whats worse then getting a bad present on your birthday? dying.

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Q: What did one water bottle say to another water bottle? A: Nothing. Water bottles are inanimate objects and are thus unable to communicate.

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Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

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3 black guys are in the back of a car. Who is driving? A taxi driver

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these guys im about to shoot owen,john,henry,shawn

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What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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