Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

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Why did Shakespeare die? It's called life.

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What did the cat say when it stepped in poo? Meow.

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How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

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Q:Where did sally go when the bomb went off? A: Everywhere.

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Why was the man worried? because he had a shotgun up his ass

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A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

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How did the Mexican get into the united States of America? He was an american citizen, just of mexican descent.

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A man walks into a bar. and buys a drink.

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What do you get when you cross a black man and an octopus? I don't know, but it sure would pick a lot of cotton.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a killer

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Knock Knock Who's there? Who Who who? Hoodini

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

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what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

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What's green and has wheels? grass... i lied about the wheels

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why wuz 6 afraid of 7 7 had a gun

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Who let the dogs out? The dog's owner.

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A lesbian and a gay both lie about there gender on eharmony, trying to get a date with someone there own gender. By coincedene, they get matched and go on a date, and both of them realize how weird this situation is and go home.

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What's worse than finding a spider hidden in your sheets? The spiders being followers of the devil then sucking out your soul and giving it to the devil while your body gets stretched and you die a very painful death.

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two scientists line up a frog at a line and tell it to jump it jumps 4 feet they cut off one front leg and tell it to jump it jumps 4 feet they cut off the other front leg and tell it to jump it jumps 4 feet they cut off a rear leg and tell it to jump it jumps 2 feet they cut off its last leg and tell it to jump it doesn't move they tell it to jump again it doesn't move the scientists come to a conclusion: frogs with no legs...cant hear

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Why did the chicken cross the road? No one knows because humans do not have the capability of accessing the chickens brain to receive their knowledge and what they were thinking about in the past.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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What's the hardest part of walking through a pile of dead babies? My penis.

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A husband and a wife were having a conversation: Woman: Why is the baby on fire? Man: I dont know. Woman: BUY ME SHOES!!!!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops