What building has the most stories? The Burj Khalifa.

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Roses are purple violets are green I am color blind shut up

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If you call Dani a dog one more time, lick a gooch nut suckers. XoXo Jamie <3

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Why don't dinosaurs eat other dinosaurs? They're all dead.

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Whats the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? You can't unload one with a pitchfork

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A student asks a teacher: Sir, how much time would it take for me to do this quiz. Teacher says: From the second I give you this test to the second you hand it back to me.

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Your mamas so fat that she went to the doctor and he said she has a very high case of diabetes so now she's trying to excerise more and watching what she eats.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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Yeah your point? Anyway, so then the brain surgeon goes: I have have cut into thousands of brains, and never seen a single thought.

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Q: Why did the little girl fall from the swing? A: Because she didn't have arms. Q2: And why did she fall from the swing again? A2: Because she tried to get on it again.

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OMG I JUST FOUND THE GREATEST WEBSITE YOU SHOULD TOTALLY CHECK IT OUT OMG ITS http://anti-joke.com/submit

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How many babies does it take to paint a fence? depends on how hard you throw them.

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A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

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Communism hehe xd

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What's the best way to toss a salad? With a salad spinner from the home shopping network.

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Whats invisible and smells lile carrots? Rabbit fart

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"How high are you?" "I don't know, sir." "Well, look at the god damn altimeter."

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Why'd the blonde jump out the window? To kill herself

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A black man "walks into" a club. Several minutes later he is dead. The police, in a later press conference, refuse to admit that the club ever left the officer's belt.

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What do you call a joke that isnt funny? This one.

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Q: What would have been the easiest way to stop the second world war without killing anyone? A: Paid Hitler for his art.

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Max Head fingered himself, HAH

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops