What would an ice hockey player do if the ice melted? Walk off, as the ice is only 3/4 of an inch thick.

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, its because your wearing a suit and on the front door it says no people in suits are allowed." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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Knock knock Who's there . I said who's there. Sadly this poor man didn't understand he had just been door bell ditched.

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A cyclist looses control in a race. How does he stop? Run into the spectators on the side of the road.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. It is a coincidence that none of them have the same hair colour.

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I gotta friend named Michael Nugyen and he dishonored his family. Did I mention he was asian ( he live in tampa fl )

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Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

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Is this the Krusty Krab? Yes...? No, you're still Patrick!

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Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

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Why is 6 scared of 9? Because 9 is a zombie.

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What was the last thing that went through the crashing helicopter pilot's head? The propeller.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Some wild chickens have regular seasonal migration patterns that might require them to cross a road while traveling south. Wild chicken movements include those made in response to changes in food availability, habitat or weather.

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Why did the man commit suicide? He was depressed.

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Your mother is so fat, she appeals to my secret fetish.

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what did the blind kid boy get for Christmas? he doesn't know because his parents are mute.

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Why didn't the woman go to the kitchen? She was kidnapped and forced into sex-slavery

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What goes up and down, up and down, up and down, forever? An insult to Newtonian physics.

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How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

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What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

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A man walks into a bar with a monkey...I forget the rest but your mother is a hor.

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Why did Mr. Cannon dies Because he got shot as an undercover cop in south america

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Q: What is soft, fuzzy, and lives in the woods? A: Yeti

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Why couldn't little Tiffany play kickball with the other kids at recess? I chopped her legs off.

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how many blondies were at the mall? none they were too busy trying to find the sun.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops