Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint.

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How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

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What do you call a girl who has slept with five guys? Her name.

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A man got struck by a car and was rushed to hospital on life support, he died shortly after. His wife was informed of his death by the doctors and shortly after she killed her children and finally hung herself.

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A man walks into a pizza place and orders a pizza. When he got the pizza, he saw it had pepporonis on it. He liked that, so he ate the pizza.

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what do you call a mexican being baptized? a mexican becoming christian.

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Whats orange at the bottom of the swimming pool? A baby without floaties.

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whats brown and half eaten? yeah an easter egg that a parent has given to there son/daughter before dinner

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If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

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In a stranded island, a plane crashes. Only one man survives. He asks himself "Where do I bury everybody else?" The others proceed to look at him strangely. He was the only surviving male.

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whats the difference between harry potter and a jew? harry potter can escape the chamber

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What did chris say? Nothing, bushes cant talk!

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Should a pole bump an alarm?

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What is faster? A bottle of milk or a sand-filled pin ball machine? A fighter jet, stupid!

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the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

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One night, a man dreams that he is a bird that can fly into outer space. The next day the man finds out that his son is a homosexual.

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There's this traveling merchant from Flint, MI. He goes door to door trying to sell shampoo. He is having a lot of trouble selling shampoo in Flint because they were hit hard during the recession and now ahve trouble affording even the most seemingly cheap products.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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Why didn't gram-pa give his grandson a Birthday present? Because he had Alzheimer's and forgot about him.

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I f*cked your mom last night and she liked it. 8====D~~~~

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What's big and messy? A big mess

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What do you do when you have a baby and your being shot by a terrorist. You use the baby as a shield.

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what do you call a million black people on the moon? a good start

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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