What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

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Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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A black man "walks into" a club. Several minutes later he is dead. The police, in a later press conference, refuse to admit that the club ever left the officer's belt.

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Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

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My uncle told me that slow and steady wins the race. He died in a fire.

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger. They had left the keys inside and no-one was around to help.

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What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

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Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown I should probably water My garden soon.

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Q: How do you stop a black man from drowning? A: Quit peeing in his mouth.

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these guys im about to shoot owen,john,henry,shawn

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Three Jew begin to walk down the street, they then pursue walking and purchase many goodies from vendors.

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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Why was the boat red and sticky? A boy dropped his slurpee. What were you thinking?!

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What looks like mud, smells like mud and eats mud? An African

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(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

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Romney: I think you would raise our debt and make more Americans jobless. Obama: It's just cuz I'm black!

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How do you know when an Asian has robbed your house? You have informed the police, who in turn searched the house for DNA evidence, eventually leading them to the criminal, who just so happened to be a troubled Asian teenager attempting to join a local gang.

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Why do the Chinese eat cats? Because it is a good source of protein that is relatively easy to obtain. Really, it's not much different than killing pigs for food.

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What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops