what is the difference between the number 2 and the number 5 3

There was a kid and one day he didnt do his homework...he failed.

What happened to the hungry child? He got out of Africa

Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

whats brown and sticky? Doody

if life gives you lemons, you have some lemons

What's more disturbing than finding an apple in your worm? The fact that you're eating a worm.

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

Roses are red Violets are blue I like peanut butter Can you fly?

your mum is so fat her patronas is a cake...

How do you drown a fish? You don't...

knock knock! who's there? Jim Jim who? Jim Goldenbach

Blind jokes are not funny! I just don't see the humor in them

Micael Jackson enters a bar. Everyone screams, and then someone runs over and pulls the cheap mask off the impersonator's face. Michael Jackson IS DEAD, get over it

What does china and an 80 year old body builder have in common? They're both asian. I forgot to mention that the body builder is japanese.

Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

the waterhorse is a beautiful creature. It often frolics through fields of wheat.

Why did the boy throw his alarm clock out of the window? Because he was angry at the alarm going off

Why should you never push a Mexican off a bike? Because he will file a lawsuit against you in the event of an injury.

Q:What do you call a black man that got to the moon and back in a space rocket? A: A golfer, he is a pro golfer now!

How many Mexicans does it take to screw a lightbulb? None, they couldn't cross the border.

If Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom, Where is Bikini Top?

What's the easiest way to make new friends? With Play-Doh.

Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? The door was a loaf of bread.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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