Why did Sally fall off the tree? I could explain officer. You see, I was jogging and I was looking for my dog and she went on to me and I told her to stop but she wouldn't listen. I'm innocent I tell you! Innocent!

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What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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What do you call a fish with no I Defected at birth

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Do Re Mi Fa So La Ti Only musicians will understand.

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Whats worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two busses.

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Guy 1: (to guy 2) Close your eyes, stand on one leg, spin around, and yell "I have never eaten a cucumber!". Guy 2: No. Guy 1: Ok.

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What do you call Jack Black on a bad day? Kevin Hart.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

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Why couldn't the melons get married? As gay cantaloupes, their jurisdiction didn't allow for same-sex marriage.

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What did the confused blonde girl ask to a nearby student? Nothing. She isn't supposed to chat because it's study hall and they enforce a strict "no talking" policy.

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Why did the washing machine laugh? Because it took the piss out of the knickers!!!!! :)

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what do you call cheese thats not yours? A: stolen cheese.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

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Why doesn't McDonald's sell hot dogs? They don't want to advertise for McWeenies.

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What is the definition of child abuse? Ms Bazan

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what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

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Why did the duck cross the road? Because he wanted to. Problem, AntiJoke community?

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What did the tooth brush say to the toothe paste? Minorities.

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TWO PADDIES PASS A PUB

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What happened to the girl who got an infection from an abortion? She died.

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What do you call a black man running really fast down a street? Active.

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Whats more funny than 1 bomb on 8 babies? 8 bombs on 1 baby.

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What's hot and cold at the same time? Hotcold.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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