An american, a mexican, and an asian are on a boat. The boat is sinking because it is too heavy. The people decide to throw off things that they have a lot of in their country. The asian throws rice off the boat saying, "We have plenty of rice at home." The mexican throws tacos off the boat saying, "We have plenty of tacos at home." The american throws out the mexican saying, "We have plenty of mexicans at home."

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A pirate walks in to a bar. The bartender notices he has a steering wheel in the front of his pants, so he says to the pirate, "you know you've got a steering wheel in your pants, huh?" The pirate responds, "Arrrrrrrrr, it's for me carrrrr."

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What did the indian boy say to his friend? He didn't he was too busy studying

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what doesn't kill you makes you crippled for life because you lost use of your legs in a tragic car accident

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Why is the sky blue? You like men.

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Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

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Why did little Timmy fall off his bike? His pace maker failed.

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What happened to George's pet rock? It ran away.

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Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

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Touch it gently, put two fingers inside, if it's wide use three fingers, make sure it's wet and rub up and down. Yep that's how you wash a cup.

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I dont think i could ever stab someone, I can barely get a straw through a capri sun

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why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

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today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

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What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

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What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

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what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

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roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

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Wooooah! Thats literally the sound I made, anyway, can you like type the entire story in one setting, I feel weird, did you just try to hypnotize me? Anyway, are you trying to, woah, I am like high now...

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I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

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Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

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Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

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Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

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Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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