Why did the Mexican jump the fence? He was at his neighbors house and it was shorter to cut through yards than to walk to his house

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Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

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Why did James drop his ice-cream? He was mourning the loss of his mother to terminal illness so he threw himself in front of a train.

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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What do you call a black guy doing community service? Someone who wanted to give back. Stop being racist.

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Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

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why couldnt the jew play basketball? He was handicapp

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There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

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Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

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If I said you had a beautiful body would you stop asking me if those jeans make you look fat?

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Comedian: Do you all wanna hear a joke? Audience: Yeah!!! Comedian: Okay! What did the bad comedian say to the audience? Audience: What?!! Comedian: Chicken butt. Thank you, you've been a great crowd. Good night!

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What's green and has wheels? grass... i lied about the wheels

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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yo mamas so ugly.... everyone died. the end.

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How do you get a one armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder, he needs help.

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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Why did the water in the lake disappear? There was a toilet at the bottom.

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why wuz 6 afraid of 7 7 had a gun

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Light turned green, indicating that it was a safe and appropriate time to cross

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whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

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Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

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Camon is to Jerry Sandusky as Cole Ryder is to Will Higgins!

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Q: What did the Jewish man say to the Muslim man? A: Hello, how are you today? Nice weather we're having, isn't it?

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How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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