A guy walks into a Bar ........ OUCH

An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

Why did the man walk instead of taking the bus? Because he felt like getting a heathy workout.

What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

Your momma's so stupid she stuck a power cable up her ass. Shortly after she died

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and i am too

A Man Gets Cancer He eventually Loses all his hair and drops dead

A man was arguing with his wife over the phone at a trainstation. She threatened to leave him he did not stop his physical abuse. The man became so mad he hung up the phone. He then noticed a blind man was grinning at the overheard discussion. The husband walked over and pushed the blind man on the tracks. He died

What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know because he got hit by a car.

Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

why did the boy call the girl a bitch? Because she was beautiful.

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

Why was chuck norris the anti christ? Christianity was being threatened....

Is it a ironic if a man with ADD is driving a Ford Focus?

What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

If I was in a room with Osama bin laden and george bush, and my friend. And I had a gun with two bullets, I'd shoot my friend twice.

What's a fry cook's favorite day? Saturday. It's his day off.

Whats red and bad for your teeth??? A brick!!!

whats worse than failing your maths test?

roses are red, violets are blue, Hitler killed 6.6 million jews.

Why didn't Cheryl's mother recognize her when she was wearing a blue shirt and jeans? Because Cheryl's mother has Alzheimer's.

What's worse than stubbing your toe? - AIDS. What's worse than AIDS? - Getting AIDS and stubbing your toe.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No one, because a hollowed out pineapple carcass would not be able to last longer than a month in that high concentration of sodium.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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