What did one dog say to the other? Nothing silly...dogs can't talk.

Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

Why did the man walk into the grocery store? Because he had run out of peanut butter

How many electricians with a suitable ladder does it take to change a bulb? If the bulb fitting is now obsolete it may not be possible.

why are crocodiles so angry? because they have a lot of teeth but no tooth brush?

why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

It's not gay until eyes meet or tips touch.

A sad guy walks in to a bar and the bartender asks, what's the matter? The guy responds, I just found out i'm deaf

If Santa and a Blonde woman jump off a building who hits the ground 1st? They both do due to Galileo's discovery of two objects with different masses but similar densities hit the ground at the same time.

One sux, the other is decent. But supporting the sucky one shows u are dedicated.

FOX News: Fair and balanced

Why couldn't the journal cross the street? Because there was a red light.

Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? There was no cross walk.

Katy perry isn't on clould nine because it's physicaly impossible to stand on water persipitation.

There's two blondes a black man and a camera man...

A man walks into a bar and orders four shots. Before the bartender asks "If it really is that bad of a day". The man says "Yea I need this shit". The next day the bar is overwhelmed with police and investigators. The bartender had emptied a revolver in the tired business man's face and vanished.

A miserable man committed suicide.

A duck walks into a grocery store. He looks at the shopkeeper, who then grabs a broom and shoos him back outdoors.

What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

What stinks of shit and has money. Smelly Mc Dee I lied about the money.

What did the Insomniac, Dyslexic Priest do? He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

Were do seamen live under the sea? A submarine!

Three children had stumbled into an old cottage where they were met by a wizard. The wizard pointed out a slide in the corner of his cottage. He told the children that they could each go down the slide and that they could shout out a word while sliding. He told them that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "GOLD" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of solid gold. Due to its extreme hardness the child was killed immediately on impact.

why did the black man start crying? because his ancestors were treated horribly

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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