Do you know what my Granddad said to me before he kicked the bucket? He said; how far do you think I could kick this bucket? Then he died.

What is square, brown, and smells funny? A box with a dead body in it.

What's worse then the bomb that went off in boston? The second one right after.

Q: How many teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they just sit in the dark and complain about it.

Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

Why did Jim not go to the park and play football with his Dad today? His dad got hit by a bus and lost his legs

What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

whats orange and cant talk? an orange

Why did Jill fall off the swings? -Because she had no arms. Knock Knock? --Who's there? Not Jill. What did Jill get for Christmas? -What? I don't know. She couldn't open it.

why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

Q: The girl fell for the guy, but the guy was sad about it, why? A: Because she fell off a cliff.

A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

Haikus usually make sense, but sometimes they don't refrigerator.

An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

hey I just met you, and this is crazy. I have alzheimers. Hey i just met you.

What's the difference between a chicken? One leg is both the same

I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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