What's worse than stapling a baby to a tree? Stapling the same baby to ten trees.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and i am too

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Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know because he got hit by a car.

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A man was arguing with his wife over the phone at a trainstation. She threatened to leave him he did not stop his physical abuse. The man became so mad he hung up the phone. He then noticed a blind man was grinning at the overheard discussion. The husband walked over and pushed the blind man on the tracks. He died

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why did the boy call the girl a bitch? Because she was beautiful.

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What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

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A Man Gets Cancer He eventually Loses all his hair and drops dead

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

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A man walks into a bar. Splash.

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What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

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roses are red, violets are blue, Hitler killed 6.6 million jews.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No one, because a hollowed out pineapple carcass would not be able to last longer than a month in that high concentration of sodium.

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Whats red and bad for your teeth??? A brick!!!

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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If I was in a room with Osama bin laden and george bush, and my friend. And I had a gun with two bullets, I'd shoot my friend twice.

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What is said about the man who is addicted to online gaming? He plays more than 5 hours per day and doesn't have any social contacts or whatsoever.

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whats worse than failing your maths test?

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Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? No, we can't.

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What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

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What's a fry cook's favorite day? Saturday. It's his day off.

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Why was chuck norris the anti christ? Christianity was being threatened....

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Is it a ironic if a man with ADD is driving a Ford Focus?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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