What's worse than finding a spider hidden in your sheets? The spiders being followers of the devil then sucking out your soul and giving it to the devil while your body gets stretched and you die a very painful death.

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Your mom is so ugly that you should buy her a paper bag to cover her face because she is just so very unattractive that it burns mine and everyone else's eyes.

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What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

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A blonde walks out of a hair salon She had just dyed her hair.

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Why did the monkey eat the banana? Because it was sexually confused

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I stabbed someone in my garden, There's blood everywhere

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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What do you get when you add two boys and two girls in a basement? Four people fearing their lives during a tornado.

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What do you give the person who has everything? A 20$ gift voucher

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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yo mama so dumb... because she was not properly educated

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What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

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What did the african child get for christmas? Abducted.

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What's black and has ne education? A tire.

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Is the glass half full or half empty? The liquid in the glass is not at exact half, so that question is not answerable.

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Why did the boy die while brushing his teeth? The toothbrush wasn't water-proof.

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2 blondes were heading to Disney world, they saw up ahead that said "Disney World left" then took a left and enjoyed Disney World and had fun on the rides

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What's the difference between a BMW and a pile of dead babies? There isn't a BMW in my garage.

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An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

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So this guy walks into a bar and– Nevermind it's really not that funny.

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So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

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Have you ever tried ethiopian food Neither have they

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The police catch them, and they are sentenced to jail.

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How do you kill a blonde? You stab her many times in the ear with a fork......Then finsih her off with a spoon. No knives those hurts

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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