How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

Whats red and tastes like parsley? Not Red Parsley

What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Can I have a pound for my bus, pal?

What did the black man say to the white man when the white man was drunk and naked on the roof dancing? Quit fucking around Brad and get off my roof or I'm calling the police because this is the third time this month.

WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Why can't black people swim? Many of them can. It's racist to assume that.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

roses are red, violets are are blue, I have five fingers, the middle one is for you

how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of African decent to sit in towards the front of the bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of European decent.

Little molly says she wants to have a baby when she grows up because her little baby brother died of ta-sacs 6 months after birth.

Q:How many dead babies fit in a bathtub? A:It depends on the bathtub, but if all of them were the same size, babies also differ in size and sometimes shape. If all bathtubs and babies are the same, the number would be 1, because every baby will be as big as the bathtub.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police, your entire family died in a car accident. ... ... The police, your entire family died in a car accident who?

KNOCK KNOCK who's there? OUCH! what's your door knob made of? nails?

school homewrok

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

whats worse than having ants in your pants? getting sotomized by a lightsaber

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

I like it it the butt -Tyler James Nehring call me 863-670-1547

A man walks into a bar. It leads to a fight that is enjoyable to watch.

why does the gay guy like anal-sex? because he's gay.

You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...