What's green, has 4 legs and can kill you if lands on your head? a pool table.

Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

How do you put an elephant in a taxi? You open the door, make sure the elephant is seated confortably, and close the door.

What did one alien say to another alien? I miss Mexico.

Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

women and girls can really get enjoyment out of sex. it's not really about controlling the man.

What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? - "Get down"

There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

A blind man walks into a bar, bystanders help him up.

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to smash with a hammer and the other one is a watermelon.

Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

What's white and red all over? A white guy who walked in the ghetto.

A man looks both ways before crossing the street. He gets hit by an airplane.

Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

Burrinbar Smells like incest anal sex!

Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

What do you call a black teen on Maury Povich? A mother.

what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

A Jew, a Muslim, and a black guy board a plane. Who gets kicked off first? The jew for his unruly behavior towards the flight attendant.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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