Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

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How many psychiatrists does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One, usually.

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i once bought a timeshare, guess what happened? i'm broke

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your face is so ugly it belongs in a zoo, but dont be sad, i forgot the rest, so you wont feel really bad. I need a rhyme, treasure chest.

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What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend........... Wiped his ass

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Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

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Whos better at Hide and go Seek, Anne Frank or Osama Bin Laden? -Why dont you tell me, they're both dead !

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Michael walked into a bar, The rest of the bar initially erupted with laughter until the his carer made everybody aware that Michael suffered from brittle bones and that he had actually fractured his hip after colliding with the bar. People then understood the gravity situation as the bartender immediately dialled the emergency services. Michael managed to recover physically from the accident but to this day he is still scarred from the laughter aimed at him the night of his accident and is too afraid to return to the bar again in fear of being mocked despite the misunderstanding of the situation.

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What do pebbles and Batman have in common. They're both pebbles. Except Batman.

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knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car. -Tag

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Why did the man punch NUGE in the face? Because he got angry that NUGE was being such a BA person and he was jealous of NUGE'S style and he just got dumped by his ugly as poop mom which was eating Anti Chicken.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because that's where the oncologist's office is.

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what happened when steven hawking's date stood him up? he feel down

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teacher:humpty dumpty sat on a wall.... me: wait, why was he up there ms.park? teacher: well hes never been the same since vietnam, his wife divorced him and now hes a raging alcoholic.

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What do you call a deer with no eye? No eye deer ( get it, it's like the red, necked southern speaking states )

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What's purple, smells like an eggplant, and looks like an eggplant? An eggplant.

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Knock Knock Whos there? Rivkee Rivkee who? RIVKEEEEE FIRETRUCK!

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Yo momma so hairy she needs to shave herself.

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Why was the boat red and sticky? A boy dropped his slurpee. What were you thinking?!

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why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

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Yo momma so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook. Chins in a phonebook? I don't get it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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