A man falls out of a boat. What happens next? Well, you would think he'd know how to swim, but due to his alzheimer's he didn't, so he drowned.

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A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

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Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

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Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

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Have you ever had a traditional Ethiopian Dinner? Neither have they.

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

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A man walks into a bar with a chicken on his head the bartender asks the man why do you have a chicken on your head the man replies the chicken is thirsty

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You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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Dude man, I'm high...

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What's the difference between an iPhone and a Samsung Galaxy? Google it, there are many differences.

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

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Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

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CALLER: Is your refrigerator running? OWNER: Yes, it's working just fine.

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What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

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Hold on, please hold on! I will explain, it is my name, but I don't know whats so wrong with it at all... Please give me five minutes, I need to use the bathroom, please don't go just yet, don't be mad at me, what have I done wrong now? I mean if you are gonna go to sleep or something please do not be upset with me.

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Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

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Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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