knock knock! who's there? Jim Jim who? Jim Goldenbach

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what do you call cheese that isn't yours? not your cheese, you probably stole it.

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did you hear the joke about the vagina ....... you'll never get it

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Knock knock. After 1 and a half minutes of waiting, Phil assumes his friend is not home, and promptly leaves.

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What's the same between a grape and an airplane? they both have wings but the grape doesn't

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What was the black kid carrying when he was running down your street? His television set

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This man was known to beat his wife alot, To the car door to open it for her...

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Nero, listen, do not try to imply that you created the Iron man method, that was developed by many people over the duration of many years in the former underground society. You seem far too educated to be the savage you claim to be, if I told you that our people will do the uttermost to see if we can fix that eye of yours and succeed, will you forgive my failure and imperfections as a leader? Look at it this way, I am a leader, not a ruler, what my followers do is up to them, but if they cannot understand that they have to pay the consequences behind their actions, they have no place within the order, as for the expression "my order" it is simply what my many followers like for me to say, not because they are unwilling to take responsibility, but as a token of praise. Our articulations and means of expressing desire and such are very much the same, have you ever been part of our order?

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What did the farmer say when his cow got stuck in a tree? Nothing, it didn't get stuck in the first place because cows are incapable of climbing trees.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To go home and beat his wife

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What did the rich white student to the poor arabian teacher? good morning Mr.Stevenson.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

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Why did the boy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs

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What do you call a deer with no eye? No eye deer ( get it, it's like the red, necked southern speaking states )

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Knock knock. Who's there? Not your grandma! Cause she's dead! Come to the funeral

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Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

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Q: what happens if a black guy says hi person? A: he says hi person

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Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

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Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

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I think everybody should have a penis.

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What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

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A blonde takes a math test it says find x? She circles x and puts there it is!

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Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

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All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops