- Anti Joke

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

What's the cure of cancer? Death.

How did the frog fly? It drank a magic potion. How did the snake fly? It ate the frog How the the eagle fly? It already can.

What is stupid, black and high? A stupid black kite.

Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

Knock Knock Who's there? Sorry, wrong house.

What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

Who is the most vile man in Britain? Jerry Carr, the guy who works at the casino.

Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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What do you call black people in a pool? Healthy

Why did the guy lose the race? Because he had explosive diarrhea

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

What do you call a person with one eye and no arms? Names.

How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

What do you get if you cross a river with a cat? Wet.

Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

What's easier than a whore? Doesn't matter, your mom's a whore either way.

How many jews can you put in a four seat car? two in the front two in the back.

What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

whats the difference between a black guy and and an asian person... who cares kill them both