Why did the little boy cross the road? He didnt, he got hit by a car and died

- Knock, knock. -- How many dead babies does it take to cross the street and walk into a bar? - That's an odd question to ask to a visitor. -- Your mom.

Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

knock knock who's there? the man the man who? the man who murdered your whole family

What did one ginger say to the other? W are both gingers.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

Q: whats the difference between a shoe and a ginger? A: shoes have soles.

Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

Nero, I can barely stay awake, can we chat more later today though? I would really enjoy that, and sleep before that.

knock knock Dave's not here.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

When I see the Viagra commercial telling you about all the side effects and they say "if you have an erection lasting for more than 4 hours, call a doctor." If I have an erection that lasts that long, I'm not calling a doctor. I'm calling my mom; who I always call when I'm sick.

A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a screaming goat

What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

what did batman say to robin before they got in the car? "robin get in the car"

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

Why'd the chicken cross the road? The chicken doesnt understand the concept of a street so it was most likely just wandering across the street

Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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