knock knock who's there? nobody. then why are you knocking?

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what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies?

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Why did the car go down the road? Someone was driving it. Why did the car stop? Because he suddenly fell and had a stroke.

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What did the home-less man eat for dinner last night? Nothing.

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Q:Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? A:He slipped and fell. Q2:Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A2:He was stapled to the first monkey. Q3:Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A3:Peer pressure.

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roses are red, hills are green. i know you're ugly and i know I'm so mean.

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why was the jewish man so sad because his family was killed in a bus accident and he severed his spine and cant walk ever again and his insurance couldunt pay for the bill so he is now bankrupt so he borrowed from the mafia and now owes them 100,000 in a year or they will cut off his fingers and gauge out his eyes

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What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? I do not know because it depends on the woodchuck; however, if some statistical evidence is gathered on the average amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck you most likely would get a close answer, considering that the statistical research was not flawed.

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Chuck Norris was dropped twice when he was a baby, once on concrete and once on hardwood

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your mother is so fat, she possesses her own orbit

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I want some pudding. but I didn't have my meat. how can I have pudding?

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Why was the man denied access to the college Because he did not have good grades in the past.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock, knock Who's there? Not Susie

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What is worse then your car getting hijacked? A 900 pound man eating a Donut.

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Q: Why are pine trees green? A: Because of the green pigments in the leaves known as chlorophyll which are used to capture sunlight.

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Henry VIII: I need another wife!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thomas Wolsey: All right then. How about my nan? Henry VII: I'm dead!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :~D

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What do you call your mother's bipolar brother with three arms? Uncle.

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What did the drunk man say to the average civilian? Blahaahahahahahuhuh!

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"You must defeat Shen Long to stand a chance"

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why did hellen kellers dog run away? because if your name was awughunguh you'd run too.

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What do you get if you cross a goat with a horse? Long letters of complaints by animal rights groups

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's hard to tell, but i could really use a cigarette.

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why did the elephant cross the road? it was the chickens day off.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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