Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes.

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Why did the kid lose his mom? She was shot.

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An orphan falls off a cliff.

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"Doctor, I seem to have a large horn-like growth protruding from my nose". "Well, yes, that is because you are a rhinoceros".

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Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their car with a coat hanger. They had left the keys inside and no-one was around to help.

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Q. Why did the lotion soothe the person's skin? A. Because its ingredients were selected because of their propensity to soothe skin.

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these guys im about to shoot owen,john,henry,shawn

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Knock knock. Who's there? Andy. You're late, I've been piss-arsing about waiting for you to get here.

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Why was Jimmy sad he couldn't play the Playstation? He didnt have one

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Q: What do you call a black person flying a plane? A: A pilot.

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A: Knock knock. B: Come in. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ?cash(p)

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What is the worst part about eating a vegetable? Eating the wheelchair too.

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Why was the man picking his nose? Because he was born without one, and found one he liked.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Fire extinguisher? One puts out a fire the other one fuels it.

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A black man "walks into" a club. Several minutes later he is dead. The police, in a later press conference, refuse to admit that the club ever left the officer's belt.

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roses are red violets are blue I lost my dog to typhoid it was an unfortunate case of bed luck

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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A clown walks into a bar and orders a pie. After about 2 minutes, the bartender gives him a pie. Later, a blonde walks into a bar and orders a cake. After about 1 minute, the bartender gives her a cake. Then a dog walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything because it's a dog.

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What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

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If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

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what did the dog say to the cat? nothing cause animals dont talk.

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what's the best way to remove leaves from a tree? take them off

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops