whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? - The boy scout comes home from camp.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did blonde cross the road? She needed to get to work.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Johnny: I saw you long time ago. You were quite the school clown back in the day. Boy I remember back when I was just a whipper snapper we used play around and goof around all day. Whatdya think? Richard: Shut up, motherfuckingbitch

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What's blue and looks like water? Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

You wanna pop a bottle? I hope you are referring to bottles of water as I am underage and I refuse to partake in any said consumption of alcoholic beverages

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What did the Chinese man say to the black man? I'm Part of my Asian herritage.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why can't monkeys and kuala bears get along? Because they are two entirely different species that cannot communicate with each other...

thumb_up thumb_down -24

What happened when the little girl said Bloody Mary 3 times in the dark? - She got her head smashed in the mirror, all of her intestines were neatly ripped out and was stabbed to death with No.2 mechanical pencils. Then her parents came home from dinner to find their daughter brutally killed in her own room. They notified police, opened a case and gave up after 12 years of searching for her killer. Both parents cried for the amount of years their daughter had been gone and they both decided to kill each other. The father raped the mom while slitting the back of her neck that led to her head being detached. Then the father left his pick up truck running and through his head toward the engine, which didn't really work. So he went back inside and watched Three and A Half Men.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

I heard a scary rumor that when you plzy a windows istaller cd backwards, it plays a secret message, but what's even scarier, is that when you play it forwards, it installs windows.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

There is a asian, mexican and a blonde boy at school. Every day they each get the same food for lunch. The asian always got noodles. The mexican a taco. the blonde boy got pb and j. They decide if they get this lunch again, they will jump off a cliff. The next day they get the same lunch and jump off a cliff. At their funeral the asian mom says " if i had known, i would have made her sushi." the mexican mom says " i would have made her a burrito." The blonde's dad say "hey don't look at me, he makes his own lunch."

thumb_up thumb_down -24

Why did the skeleton not go to the party? Because without the aid of various ligaments and muscles that would be attached to the average human being's skeleton, he was not able to move himself so much as an inch.

thumb_up thumb_down -24

A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q. Why hasn't LeBron won a ring? A. Throughout his career, he has been placed with incapable teammates, thus leading to unsuccessful results. However, recently, he has been placed with individuals valid pod achieving such a goal.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -26

A man on his 21st birthday walks into a bar. He orders a piña colada. The bartender then replies "Sorry we do not sell piña coladas here." In disappointment, the man decides to order a different alcoholic drink and later becomes an alchoic for 20 years until he breaks his obsession and remarries his wife and has 5 kids. He then had a great life and died at age 92. He will be missed by his wife and children.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

don't take life to seriously nobody gets out alive

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Q:Why did the kid drop his ice cream A:He was hit by a car

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's worse than having a FUPA? The Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -26

why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

thumb_up thumb_down -26

If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's the difference between a plum and an elephant? They're both purple but the elephant is gray.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

I'm hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops