Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

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When is a door not a door? When it is ajar.

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you know why they're called ear wigs, right? cause they go in your ears! then they wig out? no, they kill you.

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2 Men Walk Into A Bar, I Forget The Rest.

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What was the color of the big lipped, struggling rap artist who violently raped and killed a young woman after robbing a convenience store at gunpoint? Red. He was covered in blood.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. Fortunately, the bra was on display in a clothing store and was not actually being worn at the time.

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I'm black and I will beat your children. (This is not an anti-joke)

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Your momma;s so fat she stepped on the scale and said one at a time please!

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dont insult justin bieber, she has feelings too!

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So a girl says "I want to be a banana when I grow up". She's set unrealistic goals and her parents fear she may be autistic.

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How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

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What did the black guy do when he heard sirens? He Ran

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What's worse than stepping in tar? Getting your face ripped off by a man sized Tarantula

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A child rides his bike down the sidewalk and stops at an intersection. He looks both ways, then crosses the road. What was he looking for? His family.

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What do you call a black prostetut with braces. A black and decker pecker wrecker

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Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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a cat and a duck walk into a pub. the cat enters first and says for the duck to put all of their drinks on his bill. the duck(being a duck)says nothing because ducks cannot speak. therefore the cat shouldnt have been speaking either.

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Why was the cancer patient often bullied by his peers? Because he happened to be an extremely bad person. He often annoyed people, was intransigent and often aggravated those around him causing them to bully him.

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Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From a catalogue.

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Out of Jill, Jason, Jesse, Jane and Harold, which one is the odd one out? Jason, because he only has one arm.

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Do you know what's the sexiest thing in the world? Sex.

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Why was Michael Jackson so bad at dancing? Because he had a broken leg.

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who's specky and stinks of shit? josh moran

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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