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What did the Chinese man do with the sick dog he found in the alleyway? He took it to the vet, nursed it back to health, and later helped the dog get adopted by a nice family down the street.

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did you know that zach is the coolest person ever? no? well now you know

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Why was the old man climbing the flag pole? Because he had Alzheimer, and he was losing his grasp of reality.

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Why is it good to date twenty eight year olds? Because there is twenty of them.

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A man walked into a bar. He needed 5 stitches.

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So I want to write an Anti-Joke, so I go to the write your own tab and see in the security code box: Which one is a country- fried rice or fried chicken. C'mon, it's definitely fried rice.

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WHATS BROWN AND SMELLS LIKE CRAP!?!?!?!?!?!?!? crap

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Q: What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? A: "Here come the elephants over the hill!"

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What's clear and looks like water? Water.

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Yo momma so fat, she was recently diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and is at great risk for developing heart disease!

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How much does Michael Vick love his dogs? More than Casey Anthony loved her daughter.

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knock knock. "who's there?" dick. "dick who?" dick ferns.

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What's the difference between Newt Gingrich's cat and a hand grenade? Gingrich's cat is a domesticated quadriped mammal, a hand grenade is a small bomb that can be thrown by hand

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What did the black man get for Christmas? Presents

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Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

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What do you call a discrase of a living enviorment? African huts there so muddy

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's hard to tell, but i could really use a cigarette.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? On average 2,950, however, this has not been properly tested due to obvious reasons.

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Yo momma so ugly that she is unpleasant to look at

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A man walks into a bar. His family has died in a tragic accident and he is trying to drink down the pain.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a whiskey sour and a mop.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferarri? I don't have a ferarri in my garage.

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So you're flying around in your bathtub, how pancakes to shingle a doghouse? Airhockey, because pizza bagels can't cry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops