How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, but if the ladder is shaky, you might need another to hold it up.

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A paraplegic walks into a bar.

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What kind of mother doesn't do laundry? A dead one.

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How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

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Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

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You know what sucks? A vacuum.

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Robin, get in the Batmobile.

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An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

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What's the difference between a chicken? One leg is both the same

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My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

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Roses are red. Waffles are blue. Blue Waffle.

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Whats the difference between the Taliban and a Football Team? I'm not on the football team.

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Why do people make fun of Laquesha? Because she's white.

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“DTF”? Says Will. “No” says Harper.

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Knock Knock Opens door because they were expecting visitors

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What did the chicken do? He crossed the road.

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What do you call a man with only one eye? Half blind.

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what do grown up's do at night when everyone lese is asleep? Go to sleep as well

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A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

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Blonde: Where's the ice? Asian: In the freezer.

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Why did the Asian man have to sit down to pee? Because he had no legs.

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About numbers, it was 180 mg of valium... And I am going to live becausepeople got there in time, my heart never stopped because luck, the doc was only making a joke about me "having ingested enough valium to die at least twice". Sanders, I just got your girlfriend to agree to a threesome, if my banana ever wakes up again, AND WHEN... Thou areth forgiven, btw I sent him a picture of Line`s unshaved vagina, and a note stating: U recognize this? Find out more on horsehead network! Meh His name is Anders something Chattington, yeah for all that know him, guess whose finger is on her unshaven... Yeah, maybe you should not have messed with a guy that can have ANYONE. Ps: Then its your mother, then your sister which is 17 (and pretty 16 is legal here so fuck you Chatty!) and then I SHALL STRIKE THY WITH THE VENGEANCE OF A THOUSAND SUNS! Because you are forgiven, which I cant even remember what means, I mean I know I am typing my experiences here, but thats only because I remember by muscle memory where the buttons are, said the doctor... I can still play Snes emulators... Not, because my numb fingers cant click anything and Line is gone. I TOUCHED HER ALREADY YA KNO! YOU SAW THE PIC, My skin is tan, and... well you know she is here... The best part? She is totally okay with you knowing, sayonara pal, id watch the "fluor" in your mothers pussy the next time you eat it!

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What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your ball sack ripped off with a grapple hook

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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