What is black and blue and red all over? My wife.

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Why did the blonde girl drink lots of water? Because the fat comments got to her and she changed her diet to nothing but water

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Why couldn't the towel talk? Because it didn't have a language.

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A man walks into a bar, he purchases a drink from the barman proceeds to finish the drink and then leaves.

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What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

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What is worse than finding an apple in you worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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I have a really good knock knock joke. You start. Knock knock. Open the door see who it is and then slam the door in your face THE END

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What do you call 100 dead babies in my garage? Murder.

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How does a t-rex eat spaghetti? He didn't he ate a velocaraptor instead.

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I was very thirsty so I decided to go get some soda.Upon reaching the soda store I discovered a very long line. I decided to leave the line and instead get some milk, unfortunately once again there was a long line at the milk store. Discouraged by still thirsty I decided to try to luck at the punch store. There was a long line there also.

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What did the father say to his child Christmas morning? you're adopted

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Why did the blonde fall off the cliff? She was blind and deaf so she never knew where to go, and her parents kicked her out for her problems. It is a sad situation that noone wants to go through

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Why was the little girl crying Someone therew a dump truck at her

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Why did the Mexican jump of the roof? Because he had a serious meth addiction that was destroying his family and he could not live with the awful things he did to get his fix.

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your mommas so fat she jumped for joy and got stuck

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What do you call a alcaholic walking down the street..... Roadkill

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What did the black man say after he swallowed the bicycle? He didn't say anything. Swallowing a bicycle is physically impossible.

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What is worse than 10 babys in 1 garbage can? 1 baby in 10 garbage cans.

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Why did the white policeman shoot all the black people in a house and not the white people Because the black guys were holding the white guys hostage

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eoin burgin is fat

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

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How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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