What did a Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know, I don't speak Chinese.

How did the thief acquire a lamborghini? He has a side job as a lamborghini salesman.

this website is a bad joke

Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

I just wrote three jokes on antijoke.com ... nope, make that four.

An apple a day keeps the doctor away. Unless your father is a doctor and you live with him.

What did the mentaly handycap kid get for christmas. A Bop-It

A Jew walks into a bar and says drinks are on me.

What's worse than Monkey Ball? Super Monkey Ball. What's worse than Super Monkey Ball? The Holocaust.

I don't want to hear another joke about female hygiene, PERIOD! -Lets go Mets

Your mum is SO fat... She died of a heart attack

Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense, Refrigerator Sex

why did the blond get and abortion? because she was forcefully raped by her 42 year old boy friend and felt she could not raise a child on her own.

-Knock Knock - no one respond , they were brutally murdered by a drug addict.

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

Friend: how obsessed are you with harry potter on a scale from 1-10 Me: 9 and 3/4

What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

What's yellow, black, and makes you laugh? A bus full of black people going off a cliff.

Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

autistic kids rock

Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

What did the fat man eat for breakfast? Nothing, he died of heart failure in the night.

What is the difference between Steve Jobs and a PC? PC's are not dead.

How many victims of the holocaust does it take to screw in a light bulb? Zero. They're all dead you sick fuck.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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