Jake pulled out a gun and held it to his head, planning to fool his friends because he knew the gun was empty. Then his friend thought he was helping out his suicidal friend by stabbing him.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bar. His own feelings of inadequacy over his learning disability have driven him to drink and is driving a wedge between him and his family

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All the kids at school we're playing soccer on a sunny day except Jenny, because she had a headache and didn't come to school that day

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you see theres this guy.

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There are 2 cannibals eating a guy well one starts at the head and the other one starts at the feet the one at the head says to the other on how you doing down there and he said ohhh having a ball you!!!!

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every time I stay in the water too long my pp gets all shriverly sometimes can't find it omg that's so weird

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse being a horse and doesnt understand english is confused and scared by its surroundings it gallops away knocking over a few tables.

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Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally. Why did Sally fall of the swings? She had no arms. Why didn't Jimmy help her up? Jimmy is a fish. There's a guy with no arms and no legs who loves to swim. What's his name? Bob. Ya know Bob's twin brother is in the same condition. He loves to play in the leaves. And what's his name? Russell. Why couldn't Sally swing on the swing? She had no arms. What did the girls mom tell her to do before she went to bed? Go to bed. How do you wake up Will Ferrell? You set his alarm clock to a reasonable hour. What did the fat man who had his car stolen tell the police? Someone stole my car.

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A dyslexic woman wears a bar.

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American: Hi im American Hispanic: Oh hey

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How many dead babies can you fit inside Casey Anthony's trunk? Trick question. She didn't do it.

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What did one wardrobe say to another wardrobe? Clothes.

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whats worse than ur granny dying? uhhh...actually theres nothing is worse

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What did the prizon cell mate get for christmas. Herpes!

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What did Dmitri say to all his friends? Nothing he has no friends

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what starts with 's' and ends in 'ex' and muslims get a stiffy from it semtex.

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What does an Eagle and a Mole have in common? The are both of the kingdom Animalia, possessing many organ systems and cellular similarities. And they both live underground. Except for the Eagle.

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What did the blond say to the ginger Stop drop and roll your hairs on fire

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A black, white, Asian, and Mexican are walking down the street. This is showing a good diverse community.

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How do you stop a baby from crawling circles? You nail it's other hand to the floor too

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I like my sex how i like my steak Pink and Bloody

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What do you call a big house full of dead people? My family

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what did joe eat for breakfast? he didn't eat, joe is schizophrenic steve's best friend

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Person1: Man I had the worst day ever. Person2: Worser than the holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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