Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

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What haircut did Timmy get at the barbershop? He didn't, he saved money from the barber by going through chemo.

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Q: Why are pine trees green? A: Because of the green pigments in the leaves known as chlorophyll which are used to capture sunlight.

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Why the babie was not drinking his milk? He was dead.

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What do you call a black man at KFC? A customer.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being the worm.

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Guess what? Chickenbuttt hahahah! lolomfg

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what did Tim do when he got married? He kissed the bride Mecheoo LOVES ASS

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Why did the blond cross the road? The police officer who arrested her for shoplifting parked his car on the other side of the street.

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What does have stripes, give milk and can fly? A zebra, a cow and an eagle.

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Bill goes and buys 45 watermelons, what does he have? 45 watermelons.

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What's worse than seven babies in a trashcan? Not much.

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what are you your not a human? are you an other?

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Why wouldn't Julius Caesar like olives on his pizza? Because he's dead.

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Wanna hear a dirty joke? The pig rolled in the mud!

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roses are red violets are blue holy sh*t slendermans behind you

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What Would George Washington say if he were alive to day. why are all the slaves free?

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What did the robot say to the boy? Nothing, the robot malfunctioned and started to strangle the boy. The authorities tried to get the robot to stop but robots are too strong. When the robot had killed the boy, it self destructed.

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What happened to your face It got hit by a bus By cheyenne

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Shah I'm being chased by a man riding instead a pig in a caravan smoking Apparently I'm a man riding on a pig in a caravan smoking

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Two Holocausts.

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Why is Lindsay Lohan out of prison? No, I'm asking.

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Knock knock Who’s there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Daisies are red, OH SHIT! MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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