How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? -250.

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How do you make a tissue dance? Tissues are inanimate objects, they cannot dance and thinking otherwise is foolish.

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what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

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whats fun,atracks children and says wrape van on it my van i lied about it being fun

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A man walks into a chiropractor. The chiropractor asked whats wrong with you? The man replies My boner has scoliosis.

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what does STFU stand for? the southern tenant farmers union.

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How many apples does it take to keep the doctor away? 1 if you throw it hard enough! haha

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Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

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Why did the piece of gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken's foot.

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Why? Because.

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There is an American, a Mexican, and a Muslim on a plane They give the American the 1 parachute and the Mexican and the north koreon explode

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what is the best part about sleeping with twenty six year olds? they are usually very experienced in sexual intercourse so there isn't much awkwardness

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what has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

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Knock, knock. Come in.

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Why did the Chinese family eat a dog? Because they were poor and starving refugees.

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hello i hav a growing interes in math and arithmetic especially when it involves pi if u are still reading this you either didnt realize that this was a joke or just didnt care but most likely it means that the first line interested or bored u and u wanted to find out wut the rest was u like????

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why was the fat man excercizing? because he was a fatass and no one liked him

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DIY LOL Can't Be Unseen Extreme Advertising Funny Tip Jars Meanwhile In ethugtxt Check out our iPhone app! Popular Newest Random Write Your Own! . . Write Your Own It's easy to take part, just type your text below! I have read and agree to the Terms of Service - View Terms of Service Anti Joke What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline. MOAR?? Want more? You might be interested in… Anti-Joke Chicken Anti-Joke Triceratops Download Our Free App! Hay guise, our iPhone app was just approved! Pictures From Our Other Sites ffuuu More Fail at 11 Extreme Advertising Funny Tip Jars Car Failures Porn SFW Quotes From Other Sites “-Your feet must be tired 'cuz you've been running through my mind. -Yea, I was running away from you..” via: Anti-Pickup Line “In the olden days I always got the impression that TVR built a car, put it on sale, and then found out how it handled....” via: Clarksonisms “Zero-snack calories..” via: Pointless Inventions “The power to instantly reduce the sales price of an item to ten percent of the original but you must buy at least ten..” via: Pointless Super Powers “I count how many steps it takes to cross a section of sidewalk, and will continue taking the same amount of steps until I realize....” via: Things You Think Only You Do “I love you.... :D.” via: ethugtxt .. Anti Joke Anti-Pickup Line Clarksonisms Pointless Inventions Things You Think Only You Do Feedback :: Advertising Inquiries :: Copyright :: Privacy :: Terms of Service ©2008-2011 Anti Joke. All rights reserved. A Horse Head Huffer Production. Rails Hosting provided by BlueBox

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This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well shit whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

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Well I do want it to end now but...WHAT? How did you get that trough? I thought hypnosis was supposed to increase awareness and focus.

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Why was the man weird... Stevie Wonder

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Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

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Knock knock. I know who is there... What? No, I lied...

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i am a slasher, a slasher of prices to get to the other side. poop goo goo gaga

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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