A dog was barking at a tree

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting c- Moo

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A man walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and its killing his family.

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What benefits came from the September 11th attacks? None. It was one of the most horrific tragedies in American History

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How many midgets does it take to screw in a light bulb about 4

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub. They order drinks, then leave without speaking to each other. It was pure coincidence they walked into the bar at the same time. They had no connections to each other, them being from three different countries.

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What's worse than finding a knife in your car? Finding a car in your knife.

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how do you wake up a really old man? you dont, he's probably already dead.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a pop because he was a designated driver

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How did the Mexican cross the border? He couldn't he didn't have legs

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Why didn't the Ginger love the pretty girl? Her attitude and personality weren't very similar to his so he presumed the relationship wouldn't work out. Uh...........stingray.

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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What's the opposite of a joke? An anti-joke. You're reading one right now.

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What did the magician say to the little boy after he "cut" his mother in half. She is dead now. Your dad is on Row 4, he is crying.

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he was dead.

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Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

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What goes up a hill with 4 legs and comes down with 3? A horse, which, upon reaching the top of the hill, has one of its legs chopped off, which is when the horse proceeds down the hill.

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What do you call a man who burns his country's flag on it's independence day? Unpatriotic

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How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

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I will grant you one wish, but it sure as hell isn't coming true!

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What do you call someone who's sad? A depressed person

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So three Jews walk into a Biker Bar. Despite the fact that is was a self-proclaimed "Biker Bar", the group of men inside were in fact rather open-minded, and had no issues with new members. They had a rich conversation, and frequented the bar thereafter.

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Two monkeys are sitting in a tree. One monkey looks to the other monkey and says, "I bet I can jump from this tree to the next tree without falling." The other monkey replies, "I'm sure you could. You're a monkey."

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Why couldn't the blond get into the library? Because the library was closed therefore the door was locked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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