How do you get an annoying baby to shut up? Hit it with a bat

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

2 blondes were heading to Disney world, they saw up ahead that said "Disney World left" then took a left and enjoyed Disney World and had fun on the rides

A man walks into a bar. He then says "ow".

why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

PATIENT: Doctor, doctor, I can't see my legs DOCTOR: That's because you're blind

What do you call a black man holding a stone with bloody hands A hard working stone mason

Q-What's funnier than 24? A-Most black jokes

What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

How many infants does it take to paint a house? Forty-Seven.

What did the convicted pedophile do to the ten year old boy? He molested him.

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter because he's not gonna come

Why was chuck norris the anti christ? Christianity was being threatened....

what did the monitor say to the boy? Im a Monitor

Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

y does byonce sing to the left? because black people have no rights

What did the women get after valentines day? An abortion.

What do you call a lepucaun leaping in a feild of flowers, on christmas? Ground beef.

what do you get when you combine sodium and hydroxide? sodium-hydroxide

What did Chuck Testa do when he saw she had died of a heart attack? He cried and gave her a proper funeral and burial.

Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

Why did hitler cause the holocaust? YOLO

I Couldn't afford a hair cut... so i purpposely contracted HIV

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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