Why didn't the little boy have arms or legs? Because they were savagely ripped off of him by a black bear on a very unfortunate camping trip.

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There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

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What did the homeless man get for his birthday? AIDS

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Stop. Seriously stop.

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Naw, not now, I don't want to be assimilated, I am a bit of a wuss right now, really tired.

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yo momma is so ugly, she attempted to get plastic surgery and then died from the amount of blood loss she got when the surgeons realized her head was filled with tumors and they failed to extract them.

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There was a chicken. It squarked.

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what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

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what did the iphone say to the galagy s3? nothing they are phones.

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

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How hard is it to cross a man with a tree? Jesus only needed a few nails

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What do you call a girl who can run faster than me? Virgin

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A little boy had a candle by his bedside. It fell over. The candle was fake, and it didn't burn down his house. When he woke up, he picked up the candle, put it back on his nightstand and had a wonderful day.

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What do you call a someone who steals from a black guy? A thief.

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"Knock knock" Come in!

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Your friend is so gay he has consensual sex with other men, and enjoys it.

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why was one black guy surrounded by ten white guys...... he was a story teller.

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How many apples does it take to keep the doctor away? 1 if you throw it hard enough! haha

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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how many babies does it take to paint a wall? it depends on how hard you throw 'em.

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Knock knock, ... Little Timmy bursts into tears, Because his parents don't love him.

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What's the deal with airline food? Food tastes different on an airplane. The atmosphere dries out your nose, the air pressure numbs 1/3 of your taste buds, and low humidity levels give you cotton mouth. These factors cause the food to taste worse than it normally would.

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Why is the sky blue? Time to get a watch.

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How do you post a Tasmanian devil? Recorded Delivery

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops