Golf.

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How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

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Q- if a small quiz is a quizicle then whats a small test A- a testicle

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Once upon a time a was born

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Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

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Knock knock Who's there? John Oh hello John come on in mate.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

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What is six foot three, plays basketball, and is black? A black dog with basketball skills and takes steroids.

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Why did it take Da Vinci so long to paint the Sistine Chapel? Because it was painted by Michaelangelo.

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Q.How Do You Make 7 People Laugh? A.Tell Them a Good Joke.

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TOFFEES HEAD LYING IN THE GRASS

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

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Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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Do you like fish sticks? Yes. Me too.

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what happens on labor day? the day she has a baby... ya your having a kid

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Did you here about the guy who kidnapped Liam Neeson's daughter? Well, he died

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whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why couldn't the man walk? He lost his legs when he stepped on a land mine in Afghanistan.

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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Why did the chick cross the road? Because she's a gold digger homie, dat chick is greedy like a mofo. She be all up in your grill and sheit tryin' getchu to spend your money lik dat homie ditch dat hoe, she aint even worth it brotha.

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Why do women have boobs? So you've got something to look at while you talk to them. That's sexist... I'm sorry.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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