Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you touch yourself at night.

Knock Knock Whos there? Rivkee Rivkee who? RIVKEEEEE FIRETRUCK!

Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

How many babies does it take to paint a wall It depends on how hard you throw them

teacher:humpty dumpty sat on a wall.... me: wait, why was he up there ms.park? teacher: well hes never been the same since vietnam, his wife divorced him and now hes a raging alcoholic.

Whats the biggest party fowl? Murder

Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

Knock knock. Who's there? Navy Seals. *BOOM* *waiting* "Yeah, he's dead." -Navy Seals

What do you get when you reverse Zelda's Lullaby ? Skyward Sword's theme.

why did the girl chug her tub of frosting? she had no spoon

Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

A fish didn't walk into a bar, because fish cannot walk.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

wow i bet grass is lucky on st patricks day. why? becuase its green all year. *smacks* ow. i kno. but hey im corn.

Your momma's so fat, people make jokes about her.

Jimmy: Daddy how are babies made? Dad: If i knew how you wouldn't be here...

Roses are red. Violets are blue.

Why is five afraid of six? Because six seven eight. (Note: The language of numbers is Subject-Object-Verb, rather than Subject-Verb-Object like English.)

Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

Two Mexicans were sitting in the back of a car. They were carpooling to save gas.

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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