What does the time bomb say to the idiot? Nothing, time bombs are inanimate objects and therefore can't speak.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf and blind.

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Want to hear a joke? Jerry Sandusky's innocence

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A guy walks into a bar and asks a nice looking girl if he can buy her a drink. She promptly rejects the offer.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have candy GET IN THE VAN NOW BEFORE SOMEBODEY SEES US!

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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I won the game.

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A man from florida and a woman from florida go to a restaurant, which isnt very popular.

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Why was the man afraid of the cat? Because he is allergic to cats and might die if he gets too close to it.

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How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Two.

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Military intelligence.

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if life gives u lemons....chuck them back and say u wanted muffins instead!!!!!!!!!!!

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What did the man say to his wife? Go make me a sandwich!

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roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at rimes, refridgerator.

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What's black and white, and red all over? A police car. Well, maybe it's not red all over. Just that little light on top. Oh, and the tail lights.

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What do you call a racist guy surrounded by a gang of black pepole? Dead.

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Yo' momma's so fat that when she steps on the scales the number seen to appear is proportionately larger than that seen to appear when the average human steps on them.

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69

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What's brown and wears glasses? A poo with bad eyesight.

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jgkbk,mn

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A man was driving to work when he realized he hadn't told his wife happy anniversary. He turned the car around to head back home only to remember that their anniversary was on Friday, not Thursday. The man shared some nervous laughter with himself as the radio played in the background. He continued on toward work and had a run of the mill day meeting with potential clients.

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A fat man walks into a bar. There is a 70% chance his mom is fat.

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A man hanged himself, leaving a note. Nobody found him, nor the note. Nobody cared for him.

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Why so serious? Why bad grammar?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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