A man crossed the road. A chicken stood in a doorway smoking a cigarette wondering why whenever he crosses the street his motives are always questioned yet men and other animals are allowed to go about their day normally. END CHICKEN DISCRIMINATION NOW!

That awkwad moment when a homeless man runs naked around a golf cource yelling hears the 19th hole bitches.

Q. How many men did it take to build a wall? A. None, the wall is already built.

I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

A wanted man walks into a bar. The police come and take him to jail.

Moose A: What do you call a moose with diapers on its head? Moose B: Me.

How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't a Ferrari in my garage

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs. Why did noone help her up? She was fat.

Did you hear the one about the koala bear that fell out of the tree? Yeah it died.

If Tigger was a black panther Christopher Robin would have named him Nigger.

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

What did the cat say to the chicken? Meow

What's the difference between a pelican? 28, because elephants have 4 legs.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

Difference between African children and a fat boy? nothing, they're always hungry.

What do you do if some idiot throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back.

Flowers are colors Love me

Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

Doctor! Doctor! Everyone seems to be stealing things! Piss off, I am a doctor not a detective you prick.

Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

How do you help a one-armed man down from a tree? Wave.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...