How do you get children to behave? Chop them up.

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Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

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How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

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A penis walks into a bar..

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I am a schizophrenic, so am I.

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yo mamma's so fat you're fat too, because it's genetical

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What looks like midnight and is addicted to shemale porn? Xavier Jordan! Courtesy of Mrs. Maxwells 7th period

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Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

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How do you make a priest cry? ... You kill his family

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When the poop hits the fan and you walk in with your pants around your ankles, it's a bad sign!

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? babies aren't fruit.

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Dear Six, Please stop spreading rumors about me and nine. I hear you two also do some pretty nasty things. Love, Seven.

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Roses are Red Violets or Red Trees are Red HOLY SH*T MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

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what is the difference between hitler and the jews? They had different religions

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Who's Juan? DIS ONE

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Why doesn't Austin have sex? Because when his wife gets hot he puts dirt on her and hits her with a shovel

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Whats funnier than 24. ... DEEZ NUTS.

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Why didnt the boy go to school? His mum threw a fridge at him!

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whats the strongest muscle the man who can't talk has. definatly not his mouth

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Why did the cat cross the street? It didn't. I cut off its arms and legs so it couldn't walk.

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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Q:What's worse than watching the show Jersey Shore? A:Nothing.

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What happens when a chicken with a goat have sex? nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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