why did the plant eat a banana? it was hungry

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They say that men are from Mars, and women are from Venus. If that is true, then who on Earth are we? [L]

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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My cat just died.

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Pain Olympics.

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Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

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What is the difference between Switzerland and Sudan? One is in Europe the other is in Africa

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Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

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Jimmy: Daddy how are babies made? Dad: If i knew how you wouldn't be here...

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Men's rights Because its an anti-joke

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I'm Polish.

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What does a black person call black friday? Friday.

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What did you say? I'm blind. (Did not write this meaning to be offensive)

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he was late for his uncle's funeral, which was taking place in the church across from his apartment.

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What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

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You know what really grinds my gears? Insufficient lubricant.

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A baby seal walks into a club. :|

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what do u call a newspaper boy on brake? your uncle because hes broke and struggling with income.

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Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

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Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

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Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

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Why did the boy fall of the swing? He had no arms or legs

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what's black, white, and red all over? A nun in a blender

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Beans, beans, are good for your heart the more you eat the less hungry you are.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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