What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

what's 2 + 2 ? 4, unless you add it up wrong.

What's green and has wheels? Grass i was lying about the wheels.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a socially responsible chicken and his family was on the other side and every day walks his ass across the street to go to work to provide for his family, unlike your dead-beat ass.

Three men are on a plane (note this is a low altitude plane) they're are going on they're 2nd grizzly bear hunting trip in Alaska. they crash into a mountain and all die. except the pilot. he left the wreckage and died from the freezing temperatures of an Alaskan winter.

what's the difference between a virginia, and steve keen? a virginia is,nt a knob

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

whats brown and stickey? a brown stick

A midget, a nun, and a kangaroo walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"

I don't usually drink beer, but when I do it usually doesn't take much for me to feel the effects of intoxication.

Who the hell is Femi Otedola?

roses are red, violets are blue, open your legs and give me an hour.

What's the relationship between a frog and a building? They have nothing to do with each other so stop trying to figure out this query.

your know what grinds my gears? when I throw my car into park while going 90 on the highway.

Why did a white man get kicked out of the Olympics 2012¿ Because he did not have down syndrome

Stephen Hawkings walks into a bar. An impossible thing because he can't walk.

Roses are chickens violets are pizza this poem makes no sense, Refridgerator

A man walks into a bar at 4:00 PM NO it was actually 4:01 because my clock is messed up and My dad likes cheese plus pie

An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

Knock Knock Whos There? I'p I'p who? HAHAHAHA

Why did the pot-head have red eyes? He got soap in them.

How did Jesus walk on water? Jesus is God in the form of a man, and he is the only human being ever with the ability to perform miracles

A guy walked into a restaurant. He sat down and had a lovely meal left the restaurant got in his car and went home. The End

TONIGHT WE DINE IN HELL! Cant we just dine at McDonalds? ITS THE SAME THING! Moral: Personally I love the taste of cardboard meat...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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