So a jelly bean walks into a bar. The bartender asks him "whatchuu doin here jelly bean" the jelly bean doesn't respond and sits there awkwardly because he neither speaks English nor has the brain capacity to move or breathe. The bartender closes the store and comes back the next day to find the bean in the same awkward position.

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How does a black man laugh? He schuckles

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Why does my friend pick up trash? Because he is a garbageman

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What's big, white, and kills you if it falls out of a tree. A Fridge

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why couldn't the blond dial 911? She lost her arms in a tragic car accident last year

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Whats the difference between a black man and a paraplegic? A paraplegic doesn't walk out on his family

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What is worse than menopause? Falling down the stairs breaking your next....

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Q: what do you call a person who's ass is dumb A: a dumbass

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What did the black man say to the Jewish man Nothing, because they were walking on the street and did not know each other

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What do you call someone who sits on anti joke every day? Luke Skywalker

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Robert Dupra getting a girlfriend.

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What do you call it when you have sex with a black man? Sex

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I was jacking off I don't use my hand tho, I just use my gf's vagiina

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what do you call the quadriplegic man who went water skiing? Skip

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Why did they choose Madonna to perform in the halftime show? Because she might die soon.

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How does Moses like his tea? Hebrews it.

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Why did a black man enter a KFC? Because he had been in town a while and had grown hungry over the period of walking around, and decided he should get some food to satisfy his hunger so he may continue his journey around town. The fact he entered KFC is purely coincidental, as he could've easily decided to go to a different eatery, but it just so happens that the closest one was a KFC.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because on the other side of the road people don't question his motives

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What did the little boy do when he got his test grade? Cried, it was 0

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

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What is worse than ten babies in the street, eleven babies in the street.

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Knock knock who's threre me, I kill you

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's witness Damn...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops