What's the difference between a man and a woman? Generally speaking- biology, except in cases of transexuality.

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What's Green and has Wheels? Ian Leighton... I LIED ABOUT THE GREEN

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What's blue and thrashes about on the floor? A baby playing in a plastic bag. How do you make a man pregnant? Stick a dead baby up his ass! How do you stop a baby falling down a manhole? Stick a javelin through it's head. How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them. -S

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How many athiests does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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What's worst than biting into an apple and finding a worm? The holoca- *the man hearing the joke then pulls out a desert eagle and shoots the man in the chest before finishing the joke then goes to jail for the rest of his life*

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What's the difference between a plumber and a gynecologist? One has a knowledge of piping system of a house and the ability to fix said pipes and the other has the medical knowledge of a women's vagina.

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What did the (real) wrestler say to the U.F.C guy? Probably something nice because most U.F.C fighters were wrestlers.

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Chuck Norris is so strong, he can probably lift more than 80 pounds

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what did the homeless man get for Christmas? nothing.

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a black man and a Mexican are in the back seat of the car. whos driving the car? their best friend

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why did the kitten drink its milk? because it doesnt have a motor so has no need for petrol.

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? babies aren't fruit.

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Why did jack fall off a cliff? Coz the hill was on a cliff.

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Why did the girl call suicide hotline? Cuz he wanted to kill herself.

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What happened when the Asian girl got a B on her report card? She committed suicide

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

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why was the cream sad? he was frozen and turned into a popular dessert

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Fred: Hey man where were you last night. Steve: Why don't yo ask yo mama.

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Gary: Stick your tongue out and say "I live in a pirate ship" Bruce: *sticks tongue out* "I lib inna pile of shiiit."

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Whats worse than finding an actual joke on anti-jokes? A.I.D.S.

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ask me if im a fence are you a fence WALNUTS!

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Who's mean and white and really not nice? Hitler

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A black man texts his wife to tell her that he is going to be late coming home from work.....Just kidding, pay phones cannot send text messages.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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