What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

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how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

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A man walks in to a bar with a frog stapled to his head. The bar tender says What the heck is that. The frog says I don't know this thing has been coming out of my but for two days

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"Knock Knock" "Whose there?" Someone who needs to consider not saying "Knock Knock" every time they are about to enter a building.

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why couldnt the jew play basketball? He was handicapp

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Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

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A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

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What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? dead parents.

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If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

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why did Dayrl win the wheelchair race? Because he had working legs.

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What does DNA stand for? National Dyslexic Assosiation.

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Whats funnier than a black man? A black president

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names.

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What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a killer

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What's green and has wheels? grass... i lied about the wheels

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What did the African get for dinner? Ebola Rice

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How do you fit a giraffe into a refrigerator? You cut it into pieces.

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Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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