roses are red violets are blue me + you =the perfect 2

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A guy forgot his 20th wedding anniversary. His wife was really mad, and said that she better have something in the driveway that goes from 0 to 350 in 10 seconds, and he quickly pulled out an AK-47 and murdered her violently.

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I had a terrible childhood. My mom abandoned me before I was born.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Just kidding, he didn't cross the road, he had no legs.

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whats white? everything thats not black, yellow, pink, red, blue, orange, purple, green, indigo, turquiose, grey, brown, khaki, gols, silver, bronze.

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? babies aren't fruit.

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Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

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What is E.T. short For? So he can fit on ship

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A man walks into a bar and says, "Hey, Jim, your wife just died from terminal cancer." Jim then says, "Cool. Hey, do you know if the games on tonight?"

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What is worse then your car getting hijacked? A 900 pound man eating a Donut.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy??? Just different pigmentation of their skin.

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How do you kill a Jewish person? Like any other person, they are like any other person of any race and religion.

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Roses are Red Violets or Red Trees are Red HOLY SH*T MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

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What did the teenage boy do when his mum was out shopping? Finish his homework.

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why was the jewish man so sad because his family was killed in a bus accident and he severed his spine and cant walk ever again and his insurance couldunt pay for the bill so he is now bankrupt so he borrowed from the mafia and now owes them 100,000 in a year or they will cut off his fingers and gauge out his eyes

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What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

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What do you call a girl who has recently been raped? Dead.

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Chuck Norris was dropped twice when he was a baby, once on concrete and once on hardwood

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What has two legs but can't walk A paraplegic

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What did the home-less man eat for dinner last night? Nothing.

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What did one fetus say to they other fetus? Nothing they were aborted.

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Why was the girl so stupid? She had mental retardation caused my Down Syndrome.

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what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies?

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Why was the boy put on his socks? So he wouldn't get blisters.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops