And now a word from our sponsors

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Why did they choose Madonna to perform in the halftime show? Because she might die soon.

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Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

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How do you get free money? Hire a black man to rob a bank.

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What do you call a bug stepped on 47 times, then burned to a crisp? Dead

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Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

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If your Jewish, then don't go to Germany.

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The man walked into the church and stayed there.

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What's the difference between acne and Michael Jackson? One is a an unsightly blemish that appears on your skin and the other is a dead pop singer.

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Why did God create Ebola? Because he hates us all.

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how do u get a bonar? u look at your mum!!

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how do you drown a blonde in a kitty pool? put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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I dunno, I dont grade love, I want to see you, touch you, bang you (sorry for not having the guts to use a nicer word, but I am tired and that is what I have in me now) And while that makes me sound like some hippy, I am very fucking picky about who I spend time with, and when. And I got no male friends, waste of time, why spend time with guys when I can spend time with chicks. Excuse me, just need my meds, speaking of sincerity, yeah I use medications, wont tell you what, but its well, not for my "mental disorders" I was born crazy, and I am going to die like I live: INSANE.

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Why did the airplane crash? The pilot had a stroke.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the engine wasnt working.

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Don't count your eggs before you put them in a basket.

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Hickory Dickory Dock, your mother is a whore

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Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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Why did the Democrat cross the road? Because the glorious leader ordered it for all minions

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what do you call a fish with no gills? Dead

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there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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