What did the three year old say when he dropped his milk? Shitting buggery!

Reality is often boring. TV is often bad for you. Reality TV is boring AND bad for you.

All dogs are mammals. All cats are mammals. Therefore, all dogs are cats.

Why did Johnny close the door on Sally's face? Because Johnny is a dick.

What do you do to Jewish people? You Challah at them.

It's a bird! No, it's a plane! No, it's actually a bird. You can see its wings flapping.

What did the jew say to the black man? I'm jewish

What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

I walk into Tesco and wrestle an obese women for a packet of ''Mini's Biscuits''. This quarrel was over nothing but a trolley filled with them. I gradually became infuriated. Meanwhile, an employee commited suicide.

A Muslim walks into a bar No-one survives the blast

Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

How did the American man get the Mexican man to jump over the wall? He didn't, after several attempts he then got a ladder and climbed over.

Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

What's better than winning the Special Olympics? ...Not being retarted.

Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

After going at it for several minutes, the teenager, with a big grin in his face, finally busted a nut during Thanksgiving dinner and was able to remove the walnut from its shell and enjoy it.

autistic kids rock

a horse walks into a bar. Noticing the potentially dangerous situation everyone leaves, the bartender calls RSPCA who come and retrieve the horse and order is restored.

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

Why did John not like his chocolate? It wasn't chocolate it was poop.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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