- Anti Joke

Why is it unpleasant to eat a meal with lots of basketball players? Because they will be focussing entirely on discussing tactics (especially if there is an upcoming game), and therefore will probably not be displaying good manners or making polite mealtime conversation.

How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

Wayne Rooney's face and intelligence.

You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

What is the difference between a fridge and a tree ? The fridge can't sing

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is a serial rapist and has been harrassing six for months.

Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why do bats fly in circles? They're mentally retarded.

Why can't Michael Jackson work at a boy scouts camp? Because he's dead.

Whats better than throwing a baby off a building? Catching it with a pitchfork.

what's the difference between a pound of liver and vomit? £3.24

How did the black man burn down the house. He threw a flaming match through the window.

If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

An Asian man walked to P.F. Changs, and asked where the bathroom is.

But I don't use all those things myself Nero, I do however teach people how to use it.

whats worse than getting eaten by a bear a bear getting eaten by a squirrel who ate you too.

What rhymes with milk...milf

What's brown and sticky? Feces.

Why is it unpleasant to eat a meal with lots of basketball players? Because they will be focussing entirely on discussing tactics (especially if there is an upcoming game), and therefore will probably not be displaying good manners or making polite mealtime conversation.

How did a monkey fall out of a tree? He slipped on a banana.

What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

Wayne Rooney's face and intelligence.

You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

my penis

What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

What is the difference between a fridge and a tree ? The fridge can't sing

Knock knock. Get out!!

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven is a serial rapist and has been harrassing six for months.

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??