Q: How do you kill a Brazilian Blind Electric Ray? A: Killing endangered species is a crime.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I saw a shooting star. It shot me.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

yo mama's so fat, that he doctors are slightly worried that she may be suffering from type 2 diabetes.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's worse than a papercut? why do you insist on asking me these questions?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chick cross the road? To get to the brothel for hot lesbian love.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Yo momma so fat, she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How can you get an asian kid to flunk a class? You can't.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

a man walks into a bar, what does he say answer: oww..

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the woman say when her boyfriend asked her to marry him? Idk my bff jill.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is frowned upon no matter what country you're in? Sex on a plane.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats shaped like a tree. A tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red, Grass is greener, When I think about you, I play with my weiner

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Dylan Hodge's mother touches her own butthole at night. Joshua Brown's sister rubs Josh's earlobes passionately. Brock is a fag. Jacob is Awesome. Daniel THINKS he's awesome. Jamie kills everyone. Apart from Jacob.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red violets are purple what the hell happened to your ugly face

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How does a person put an elephant in a closet? First they have to open the door, then put the elephant in and close the door. That was easy well how does a person put a giraffe in. You probably said open the door and put the giraffe in and close the door. Well you missed a step first you have to take the elephant out then you can put in the giraffe. Well both animals are to big to fit in a closet so you can't put them in and also the person who put the animals in is schizophrenic and the animals are fake so if you believed that you could fit them in there you might be delusional.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did one muffin say to the other Muffin? Nothing, muffins have no method of communication in any way shape or form

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is black, white and red all over? Something that pertains those characteristics

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Whats Green and Smells Like Grass? Grass

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Yar! What be a pirate's favorite football team? The Steelers. I'm originally from Pittsburgh.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Mickey Mouse peed on a house what color was it? It wasn't a color, or any pee for that matter. Mickey Mouse is a fictional character for children's amusement.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's facial hair? Hair that slowly progresses to grow out of certain areas on your face.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Engage in a lively debate with a friend, and when they are about to stump you, respond to whatever they say next with "What does that have to do with the price of tea in China?"

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your mama's so fat.... Her cerial bowl came with a lifeguard

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops