******************************************************** Okay, so there were two muffins in the oven. One muffin said, "Oh my gosh! We're gonna die!" The other muffin said, "Whoa a talking muffin!" **********************************************************

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Knock knock. Who's there? the police.

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Why is sally sad her parents abuse her daily

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was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

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What's the difference between Jam and Jelly? You can't Jelly your dick into your girlfriend's ass.

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What did the 12 year old boy get for Christmas? Herpes

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Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither, many scientists believe that the first living organisms on Earth were single-celled, prokaryotic bacteria.

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"bluar blah blah blarRR/ the stupid pointless part" dead people/ animals/ objects can't talk/ drive/ operate compueter, lol I'm so focken funni

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Mam: Wanna hear a joke about my penis?... nevermind, it's to long. Woman: wanna hear a joke about my vagina?... nevermind, u wouldn't get it.

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How do you turn a piece of meat into a vegetable Break her neck

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Q.How do you scare an emo?? A.Run after them with plasters

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What's upside down? umop apisdn

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What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

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What happened to the boy with no family? He died in a tragic car accident along with his family

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What is the similarity between John W. Booth and Pee Wee Herman? They both got arrested for shooting someone in the back of the head in the theater.

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Why the african children was sad? - Because an octopus bite his arm

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what did the gay man say to the pole? May i have this dance

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Why did the woman go in a elevator with Ray Rice? Because they were both going to the 25th floor and stairs would take too long.

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A cow and a whale are swimming in the sea when they both realize this is Vietnam and they were really chimps

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Three Kids dressed as a bear, a chicken, and a penguin walk into a bar. The bartender asks the to leave as they are all under the legal drinking age.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, suck my tip and call me Regi.

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q: why won't the asian girl do anything? a: it's pretty hard to move or speak being gagged and tied up in my basement

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What is just as important as Woman's Rights? Woman's Lefts, to maintain equality.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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