Person: hey buddy have you heard the greteat news Freind: yea you have aids Person: no my wife jusr became a pristatue an she had ten patients already i was her first

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What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

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Why did the kid lay down? Because his legs were chopped off

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Whats funnier than a baby in a jar? A baby in ten jars.

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Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

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A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

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roses are red violets are blue sunflowers are yellow I bet you were expecting something romantic but this is just gardening facts

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When life gives you lemons You've got some lemons.

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what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

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Three Jews walked into a bar. I lied... it was a gas chamber.

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Q-What did the blonde say when I stomped on her toe? A: asdfsdflsdrfjkofweønaweøiofioawef, .Would you be ever so kind to move your foot as it is currently in a position of where it causes my nerves to send pain impulses to my brain. Thanks

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Why was segregation made Illegal? because its more fun to break the law

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a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

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"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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What did John name his dog? Doggy

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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blargen fa-diddle nachen!

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Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

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like most people my age. im 27

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How do you kill a black man wearing a bullet proof turbin? Shoot him anywere other then his turbin.

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hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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