Confucius says... The superior man, when resting in safety, does not forget that danger may come. When in a state of security he does not forget the possibility of ruin. When all is orderly, he does not forget that disorder may come. Thus his person is not endangered, and his States and all their clans are preserved.

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justin beiber is having intimate sex with a woman.

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How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? You can't

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Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

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whats black red and white. a zebra with a contagious red rash

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Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

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Three gay men are in a bath tub and bubbles come up and one says "who farted?"

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When I see the Viagra commercial telling you about all the side effects and they say "if you have an erection lasting for more than 4 hours, call a doctor." If I have an erection that lasts that long, I'm not calling a doctor. I'm calling my mom; who I always call when I'm sick.

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Blonde: Where's the ice? Asian: In the freezer.

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- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

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There are 2 black guys in a car. Who's driving? The police.

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Why is the sky blue? You like men.

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What kind of dance does an alien do? None, aliens aren't real.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

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The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

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why did Susie fall of the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who`s there? not Susie

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Why do people make fun of Laquesha? Because she's white.

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An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

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What has straight black lines and is square? A refferee.

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I met a hot girl in the Tampon aisle and i asked if she wanted to hang out in 5-7 days

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Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

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How can you tell if an elepant has been in your refrigerator? It has been destroyed.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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