- Knock, knock. -- How many dead babies does it take to cross the street and walk into a bar? - That's an odd question to ask to a visitor. -- Your mom.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms Knock Knock Who's There not the girl

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knock knock who's there? the man the man who? the man who murdered your whole family

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Q: whats the difference between a shoe and a ginger? A: shoes have soles.

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Question: What is worse then a worm in your apple? Answer: A number of different things I would imagine...

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A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

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Q: What's worse than finding out yor girlfriend is a guy? A: He had sex with your dad.

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

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knock knock Dave's not here.

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Nero, I can barely stay awake, can we chat more later today though? I would really enjoy that, and sleep before that.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

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What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

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why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a screaming goat

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What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

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This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

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What is yellow and dangerous? Shark infested butter

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? The chicken doesnt understand the concept of a street so it was most likely just wandering across the street

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How many times do you have to make an ass of yourself before you look like a retard and thinking ''random'' means funny? Fuck yourself HAHAHAHAHA seriously stahp

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What happened after Will Ferrell took a dump? He wiped his ass and flushed.

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Why did the Indian have a hard time getting a hotel room? He didn't. He owned the hotel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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