A girl asks her best friends: Why are you only wearing one earring? The best friends replies: Because I took the other one out.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Two elves walk into a bar. The hobbit laughs and walks under it.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's 1+5 2+4 3+3 4+2 5+1 Whats 6+1 If you said 6 you're stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what did one gay guy say to the other gay guy? want to suck dicks? (cause that's what gays do)

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?" the horse then says nothing because horses cannot talk, only humans can talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

a cow walked into a bar and asked for a large whiskey on the rocks, 'long day, eh' said the barman, 'yes' replied the cow, 'first a large moving obstical was cutting down my food, and then my friend was raped from his milk.'

thumb_up thumb_down -2

whats black & white the colombo school shooting citv footage

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Rebecca Black walked into a stadium. There were so many seats to choose from. But, she sat down in the nearest seat she could find and enjoyed the football game.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing? A. She had no arms Q. Why didn't she get back up? A. She had no legs Q. Why did no one help her up? A. She had no friends Q. Why did Lucy fall off the swing A. She had no arms You: knock knock Other person: who's there? You: not Lucy

thumb_up thumb_down -2

The neighbours challenged me to a water fight so I am updating Anti jokes while i let the kettle boil.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a Harry Beaver? A beaver with lots of hair.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Red my dear, we are no exceptions.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A lot eh?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? run

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q:why did the boy not have to walk his dog? A: because the dog and the rest of his family died in a terrible house fire while he was away at summer camp.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why was the gay man gay? Because he likes touching other guys penises

thumb_up thumb_down -4

how do you make a plumber cry? pull up his pants....

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why was the girl unhappy with her male teacher? Because he gave her a bad grade...and raped her the night before.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Guess my favourite fruit. Peach.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What happened to the boy with cancer? He died

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops