Why does it get hot after a basketball game? Because of the crowd all breathing out carbon dioxide and the high level of activity generating excess body heat.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Jewish guy walks into a bar. He owns the place.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's worse than walking into a door by accident? Finding out that your mother molestors children.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What is worse than braking a fingernail, Learing that a clown raped your entire family

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Knock knock Who's there? Chicken Chicken who? I can't believe you're talking to a chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Did you fall from heaven? Because I seem to notice fractures to your knee, spine and a possible permanent risk of poor posture.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? She was a mother catering for her child's sporting event.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Corvette? I DON'T have a Corvette in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's worse than seeing Helen Keller behind the wheel of a car? Being run over by Helen Keller.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

why did the chicken cross the road? because chickens just walk places. they have no agenda.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

An Aussie, a Mexican and an Asian walk into a bra. You read that wrong.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I had a terrible childhood. My mom abandoned me before I was born.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven three twelve. Am i doing it right?

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what do u call a hairy cow? Harry

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Why did the girl call suicide hotline? Cuz he wanted to kill herself.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

I'm a wise old man, so I'm aloud to touch you in the bathing suit area.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What's blue and invisible ? Nothing.... Its impossible to be iinvisible and a color

thumb_up thumb_down -10

civil rights

thumb_up thumb_down -10

whats red and brown and goes about 30mph? a squirrel in a blender.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops