Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

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did you hear the joke about the vagina ....... you'll never get it

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Why are black people so ghetto? because they live in the ghetto

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What do the Chinese call "Ping Pong"? Ping Pong

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what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

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'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

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Why did the black man across the road? just kidding he didnt make it across the road i hit him with my car

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Knock knock. Who's there? The police. The police who? The band.

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Roses are nice, Violets are glorious, Try not to scare, Oscar Pistorius.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs, lying outside of your house? An ambulance, he's clearly in trouble.

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You know what's a real drag? A club foot

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What did the dealer say to the addict? Sup.

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What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

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Why was the clown in red shoes wearing skis? Because he likes to ski in red shoes, and he's a clown

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A clown walks into a bar and orders a pie. After about 2 minutes, the bartender gives him a pie. Later, a blonde walks into a bar and orders a cake. After about 1 minute, the bartender gives her a cake. Then a dog walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything because it's a dog.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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what's the best way to remove leaves from a tree? take them off

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

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A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

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There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

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what did the dog say to the cat? nothing cause animals dont talk.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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