Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but an orange gourd. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well I'll tell you. He was happily gliding down the sidewalk when he realized that his destination was across the road. He then proceeds to take In his surroundings . He finds that there is no indication telling him to stop so he then cautiously walks across the road watching for any dangerous movement. He safely makes it across and proceeds to his destination which is the slaughtering house. He is a retarded chicken

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ill take a bullet for you... on call of duty... nahhh that ruins my kd

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Who the hell knows..?

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Why did the black man steal an inhaler? Because he was broke and he had asthma.

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A man walks into a bar. He gets drunk, goes home, and beats his wife and kids.

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Why did the duck cross the road? Because he wanted to. Problem, AntiJoke community?

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Whats the difference between a black man and a bucket of shit? The bucket.

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Sally heard a scream in a dark room and went to go see who it was. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally...

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Why did the girl commit suicide? She got raped

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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There are two cows in a field. One cow says to the other - 'Are you afraid of the mad cow disease?' The other cow says - 'No, cuz I'm a duck.'

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

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How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense, Refrigerator Sex

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"So, what do you fancy doing tonight?" "Does it matter? We'll end up doing what you want anyway..."

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a man decided to climb a tree. he got to the top,raised his arms above his head and said "I am on top of the world ". after that he fell because he was not holding on to anything

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So FDR walks into a bar.

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How do you get your lawyer to shut up. Hit him with a bat.

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what do u call a black guys dick a pogo stick

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Why did the bus drive off the cliff? It's driver happened to be a tomato.

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What does a duck have in common? The further it flies the more.

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Son: Mommy can I have some cookies? Mom: Sure, they're on the top shelf! Son: But I don't have any arms! Mom: No arms, no cookies!

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I Couldn't afford a hair cut... so i purpposely contracted HIV

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops