A woman walked out of the kitchen.

Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

an emo girl walked into a white room

a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

How many blondes does it take to finish a math test? 1 if she isn't copying.

There was 3 Men. Who had crashed their car on there way back from the Bar, All 3 of them died. Once they got to heaven, Jesus told him " The better in life you were with relationships,and staying true with one love- The better Transportation you get." Guy one got a Scooter. Guy two got a bike. And Guy 3 got a Mustang. One day, Guy 1 and 2 were on their bike and scooter. And they see Guy 3 upset. "Whats wrong? You got the best transporation in heaven!!" Guy 3 looks up at guy 1 and 2, Then says " I know I do..... But, I just seen my wife on a Skateboard."

What did the Chinese man say to the black man? I'm Part of my Asian herritage.

What's the difference between your momma and a bucket of shit? Well, for starters your mother and a bucket of shit aren't even made of the same physical structure, and secondly, your mother is sentient while a bucket is not.

Knock Knock? Who's there? Sanderson. Sanderson who? You're boyfriend. Let me in. No, I'm a bit busy chopping up dead bodies. Come back in a bit. Oh let me help you! I like the way the blood runs out of the fresh ones!

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He got hit by a bus.

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

Why was Jimmy sad? Because he has a frog stapled to his forehead

What did the vampire use to make tea? Hot water, a kettle, and some nice green tea leaves given to him by his great uncle for kwanza.

Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

What's the difference between a ball and a bouncy ball? A bouncy ball is bouncy.

don't take life to seriously nobody gets out alive

What worse than a hurt puppy? Two hurt puppies.

Q: What does a bunny and a plum have in common? A: They're both purple except the bunny.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am epileptic. SLAWWAWASWAKHINGAGAGAGAKIHARGAVBAZSAWAWAWAWAAAAA

Why did the black man commit suicide last tuesday? he was just fired from his job, his sister passed away, and he became depressed

What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

Q:why is steven balmont gonna beat up mr fatty goral A:because hes a fat czech Shout out to my mandem lewis hall&moses

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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