What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

A man walked into a doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

What do you call a girl with an iq of 13 Dead

Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

What's sad about this man who committed suicide? He forgot to return his rented DVDs.

roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

A man walked into a bar. He sat down, had a nice meal and went home relatively satisfied.

your mother is so fat that she probably watches her calorie intake every day

How do you punish Hellen Keller Move the furniture around

What did the construction worker bring with him to work? - Tools

What's long and blackand goes all night? night time

SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

Dont joke about the holocaust. My grandfather died there, he fell off the guard tower.

getting up in the morning is the 3nd hardest thing :DDD

What's worse than finding a dead baby in a dumpster? Recognizing the baby as your missing child, and finding the corpse of your dead wife next to it.

Yo momma so stupid she threw a rock at the ground And missed.

Guy 1:Whats the difference between a towel and toilet paper? Guy2: I dont know Guy : SO IT WAS YOU!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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