Knock knock. Who's there? The police. The police who? The band.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Seven was black

What did the guy say to the other guy? Hello.

What do the Chinese call "Ping Pong"? Ping Pong

what's blue and looks like a shirt? a blue shirt

Why did Sally fall off the swings? She has no arms. Knock knock Whose there? Not Sally, she has no arms

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was really frogger in disguise

did you hear the joke about the vagina ....... you'll never get it

You know what's a real drag? A club foot

What did the dealer say to the addict? Sup.

What do you call a man with no arms and legs, lying outside of your house? An ambulance, he's clearly in trouble.

What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

Why was the clown in red shoes wearing skis? Because he likes to ski in red shoes, and he's a clown

A clown walks into a bar and orders a pie. After about 2 minutes, the bartender gives him a pie. Later, a blonde walks into a bar and orders a cake. After about 1 minute, the bartender gives her a cake. Then a dog walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything because it's a dog.

Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Although I guess there is probably no way to get on the swing with no arms unless there was another person there to aid you in the process, and that is highly unlikely because nobody wants to hang out with a girl with no arms. Still even if Suzie was helped on to the swing she wouldn't be able to swing because of her lack of arms. Maybe that person who helped her on pushed the swing with her on it bearing in mind she has no arms. In that case Suzie should stop hanging out with that person because they are very sadistic to deliberately shove a girl with no arms off a swing.

If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

what did the dog say to the cat? nothing cause animals dont talk.

What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

what's the best way to remove leaves from a tree? take them off

A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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