Why did the kid hide under the table? There was an earthquake.

What did the Catholic Priest say to Chris Hanson? Nothing. He attempted to flea, and was quickly taken down by law enforcement. He was then detained and processed and charged with Intent to commit statutory rape with a minor under the age of 14. He's still awaiting trial.

Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

What is the difference?

Then I contracted bronchitis from the smoke. Unfortunately I don't not have time to visit a doctor to mend this debilitation. In fact, nobody does.

Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

What did one viking say to the other viking? I don't know, it was in Danish

If these walls could talk - the public would pay large sums of money to see this marvel of science. On a more serious note, they might also tell the cops about the many dead hookers stowed within them.

i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

why couldnt the jew play basketball? He was handicapp

Why is the dog in the driver seat? Why is there birds making you filet mignon? Why is your toe blue? I don't know the answer. Go talk to your doctor

This is an anti-joke. It is not funny because "anti" means the opposite of something.

If the shoe fits....... its probably your size.

what did the oven say to the firdge you hot baby

Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? Nope! I'm a person! - SMC Digital

Where do you find a dead hooker? where you left her.

Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

Why can't Molly ride her bike? Because she has no arms or legs. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Molly.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being black

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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