What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

A girl is talking with her boyfriend - God, you're selfish!!! - No, i sell meat.

Do ya like waffles? Ya we like waffles.

Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

(A man goes to visit his neighbor) Knock! Knock! ...................... ................... ................ ............ he walks back home

why did the man go to prison? he was a serial rapist.

In class a teacher said "Stand up if you think you'r stupid" A kid stands and the teacher ask why? The kid said: "Oh I thought it'd be a bit fair since your standing up.

Why was Katy Perry naked with your mom? Because they were having sex

so today, i was walking along, and i noticed that it was sunny outside.

What's tiny and smells like a big banana? A tiny banana

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Astyanax mexicanus, a subspecies of Mexican tetra that lives in a subterranean habitat and as such has structurally degenerate eyes that have atrophied over the course of evolution.

What do pebbles and Batman have in common. They're both pebbles. Except Batman.

Is Mike here? Mike Hunt? Has anyone seen Mike Hunt? Yes teacher, he is home sick with the flu.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all began in 1807 when a 7 foot rooster gave birth to a chicken on the sidewalk while purchasing ice cream. Scientists have been intrigued so they went into study with it and won the Nobel prize. This somehow persuaded them to lure the chicken over to the other side by using a lollipop. They threw the lollipop as the chicken crossed the road, hit it in the eye, the chicken spazzed out, jumped in front of a car, teleported to London, and is now a gynecologist.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a jam sandwich

Your mamas so old. When she farted dust came out.

What looks like a smiley face no serously what I want to know

Human: Are you a frayed knot? Frayed knot: I'm afraid so.

My friends all use twitter but i dont know how to use it, so i said i will carry a megaphone around saying what i am doing at random times. Like yesterday i was in the library so i said into my megaphone "i am in the library" Yay i got 3 new followers, 2 of them were cops. Jokes From Blox Computers Corporation [Thailand] Bellow Joke In Thai: ?????? Twitter ???????????????? ??????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? ? ???????????????????????????? ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? "i am ??????????" ??????????????? 3, 2 ????????????????????

Q: Why did the black man shit himself? A: He experienced post-mortem bowel release after he was murdered due to his racial identification.

Jimmy: Daddy how are babies made? Dad: If i knew how you wouldn't be here...

The easter bunny should be a platypus. Bunnies do not lay eggs. Platypuses do, however, and are the only mammals that lay eggs.

a black guy walks into a store and is caught stealing things the police are called they get there and hes calmly escorted to the police car

There was a black guy and a blonde crossing the street. They are not related.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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