How many dead babies can you fit in a child's swimming pool? 9 (Trust me, you won't be able to squeeze the tenth one in there.)

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Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot.

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i bought a sock i wore it i bought a fish i killed it i bought a human i ate it IM A CANNIBAL

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Well, its allright then, just tired that is all, leave it be, I mean what if your wife sees it? What will she think?

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Why did Sally fall off the Empore State Building? Her mother threw a refrigerator at her. -BG

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What worse than a hurt puppy? Two hurt puppies.

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What did the kI'd with cancer get for Christmas? A coffin.

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Why did Prius driver go to jail? Because he ran over someone and then fled the scene of the crime (at 11 mph)

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Q:What's the difference between a lake? A: a tree, because motorcycles dont have doors... :) crf

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How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

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why did the magician stop doing magic ? he got hit by a bus and died

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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What happened to the orphan who ate a sandwitch? She got hit by a whale!

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Why did the blonde fall off the cliff? She was blind and deaf so she never knew where to go, and her parents kicked her out for her problems. It is a sad situation that noone wants to go through

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can you touch your toes? no

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knock knock. who's there? your neighbor. o hi come one in!

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What's worse than losing your job? Getting repeatedly hit in the face with a brick after getting fired from your job.

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How do you confuse a blond? Nordic mytholigi. That is, if shes american

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet And so are you But the roses have wiltered The violets are dead The sugar bowl is empty And so is your head

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Why are women bad drivers? -There are no roads in between the bedroom and the kitchen.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 7 eight 9

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What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

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Listen Nero, I understand now that this is your real name, actually I know where you live thanks to the good old phonebook... ...My order is fully based on respecting and treating all living beings equally and focusing on actually putting old notions such as Gods and superstition away in order to strengthen humankind`s belief in itself and others. As for Nerometal, well, that was one of my... Lesser followers, I assure you they have been taken care off, they will not be bothering you ever again. What would it take for you to forgive our transgressions? Money? Power? Ask and you shall receive, as far as your identity goes, you shall have it back and I shall use another site in the future.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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