- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

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Man hears son masturbating in room. The dad enters the room and tells him "Son if you keep jacking off you will go blind". The boy replies "Dad I"m over here".

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What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

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Obesity runs in your family. To bad no one runs in your family.

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Q: What do janitors and nuns have in common? A: They can't fly.

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Why did the Asian man have to sit down to pee? Because he had no legs.

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Why was the Jewish holocaust bad? Because it's joke always end up on anti-jokes and millions of Jewish people where murdered in it.

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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what did the man say to the other man he bumped into? sorry. and they never saw eachother again

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What is white and tastes like cotton candy? Jizzz

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Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

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What happens when you rub two penises together? Gay sex.

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

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A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

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I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

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roses are red, violets are blue. sunflowers are yellow, i bet you were expecting something romantic but no this is just gardening facts.

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Why was a black man in a police car? He is a police officer.

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Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

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Why couldn't the man make it to work? Because as he was leaving his apartment, he saw a gruesome murder on the street that was part of an ever-growing and evolving genocide. Quickly following this, he broke down into psychological turmoil and wandered aimlessly through the streets until he eventually reached a forest, where he was taken in by a wild boar and raised to believe in boar-gods. The man died peacefully while planting potatoes.

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

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What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

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Knock Knock who's there its black george washington.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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