whats awesome? a blade of grass with a mexican hat and a revolver.

What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

whats worse than finding a joke in a cracker? finding an anti joke in a cracker.

What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

Q: What do you call a stop sign in the winter? A: A stop sign in the winter.

Why didn't the condemned man seek a reprieve of his execution? He forgot.

Whats big, red and will cause severe injuries possibly fatalities if it falls out a tree? A phone box

What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

What is black and white and red all over? A nun that just fell down the stairs.

Optimist: The glass is half full. Pessimist: The glass is half empty. Realist: Find something better to do than talk about a glass.

A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

what do you call a gay guy? kevin

Bob has 80 chocolate bars, he gives 5 to his uncle,10 to his mother and 8 to his freind. He then eats 40 chocolate bars. Q. How many chocolate bars has bob got left now? A. Bob has no chocolate bars left. Shortly after Bob ate 40 bars he was diagnosed with diabetes. He then died of a heart attack due to high cholesterol.

who would win in a gang battle? WEST COAST SWAG

why did the man fall off his unicycle? because he was dead

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Two baby seals walk into a club.

What is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite.

jack and jill went up a hill so jack could lick jills candy but jack got a shock and a mouth full of C O C K cause jill's real name was randy... ... and joe diragi liked it

Q:Why couldn't little Bobby read the bible? A: His parents weren't into religion and he was blind

What did the homeless guy get for Christmas ? Frostbite

What color is the orange? Grey, I'm color blind.

A termite walks intio a bar, looks the lovely timber bar up and down, and wonders out loud..."where's the bar tender?"

why is 6 afraid of 7 because 7 is slenderman and he is chasing 6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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