What do you get when you cross an elephant with a giraffe? A really f*cked up hybrid.

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Barbara and Martin died in their apartment. The neighbor walked in and found glass and water everywhere. How did they die? -Barbara and Martin were fish.

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Q: Why did Robin Williams kill himself? A: Because he was jealous of all the attention that Phillip Seymour Hoffman was getting.

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A teacher at a school in America is writing on a chalk board. He asks the class what 50 - 20 is. The teacher begins to become impatient when noone put their hands up. This is because the school is an educational facility for asylumn seekers from Rwanda and all of their hands were cut off by a Warlord.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? ...Because he was buried in a churchyard.

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What do you call a fat, ugly kid? An unloved child.

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A wild Snorlax appeared crushing several members of the community

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Q: Where does Cher sit? A: I have no idea.

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Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

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I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poke-'er-face

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Why did the man soil himself at his daughters wedding? Because he has an enlarged prostate and has trouble sitting down for long periods of time.

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How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

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How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had bullied 6 and his old pal 21 back in his younger days.

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What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

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What's grammatically incorrect about this sentence? Nothing. I lied.

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Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

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what happens when an Asian and a Jew get married. They have children.

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Why Didn't jeff go to school yesterday? He was dead.

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Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

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How do you have sex with 9 giraffes? you don't because that's weird

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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