What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

What do you call a black guy doing community service? Someone who wanted to give back. Stop being racist.

Why did the black man get laid off? His company was no longer doing well and he was not needed.

How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

What happened to the gun that was jammed? It didn't shoot.

Once there was a ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end

What did the man do with the naked baby girl? He put some clothes on her and proceded to lay her down for a nap.

What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

Person 1. Knock-knock. Person 2. Who's there? Person 1. The doctor. Person 2. The doct-- Person 1. You have cancer and have about three weeks to live.

why was the little boy crying? he was at his mother's funeral.

A deaf man walks into a bar. Someone yells, "FIRE!" and everyone evacuates. The deaf man does not hear him and dies horribly.

knock knock come in

What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

What do you call a guy walking into a bar Dave, because that's his name

Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

A car with three black people in it is driven off a cliff and everyone dies. Why is this a tragedy? Because it is always a tragedy when human life is lost.

Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

what is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

12 in general

knock knock who's there ... '*Opens the door slowly* SUPRISE BUTT SEX!

Here comes the bride, all dressed in white. Here comes the groom, carrying a broom, because somebody spilled something on the floor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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