Why did the blonde cross the road? To get to the Public University where she worked as a Ph.D associate professor of linguistics.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Doctor, doctor, i feel like a pair of curtains. Well I'm going to refer you to a mental institute and forward this meeting to a specialist due to the schizophrenic attitude and belief you have. However, I will have to ask you to come back in tomorrow or later today for further tests as to why you feel this way. This is highly abnormal and should be fixed immediately. Another further concerns please contact me asap.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Do you know why, when geese fly south for the winter, one side of the V is always longer than the other? Because there are more birds on that side.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

patient: Doctor, doctor, i think i'm a lemon. Doctor: racial segregation and presidency is my middle name.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

What's the time when black men take over? Poor past never.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

why was the boys t.v broken? because he through it out the window

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sunflowers are yellow, Daises are white.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Knock knock. Who's there? Ryan. Ryan who? Ryan Seacrest.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

awkward moment when someone pretends to be Mr. Bear and stuffs up his own joke

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What's black and blue and made of poo? A drowning black guy, holding some blue poop

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What do u get when u lick chicken Answer- Your a retard if you did not figure it out it is obviously chicken taste DERP!

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why was the little boy sad? Because he just got paralized from the waist down and will never be able to walk again.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What's better than finding Jesus in your room? Finding Chuck Norris in your bed.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the cop stop a black guy with a Rolls-Royce? Because he was speeding while on his phone and going through red traffic lights.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

How do you stop a baby falling down a well? Throw a javelin through its forehead.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What's worse than watching paint dry or grass grow? Watching paint dry on grass.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

The patient says, "Give me the bad news first!" Doctor replies, "You've got AIDS." "Oh, no! What could be worse than that?" asks the patient. "You've also got Alzheimer's Disease." Looking relieved the patient says, 'at least it shall be over quickly.'

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Your mom is so fat that her Body Mass Index is 30,?which is considered obese, she should really try to lose some weight.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What gets wetter as it dries? Sarah Jessica Parker

thumb_up thumb_down -28

whats the difference between this joke and other jokes other jokes have a punch line

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the dog run away from home? Because the owner left the door open.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Did you hear about the black guy who went to college? No? Well he graduated in four years with a degree in chemical engineering. He worked hard all four years in order to keep his scholarship to the university. Now he leads a very successful life and lives in a large house with his wife and two children.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops