A seal walks into a club. And proceeds to die. Why? The seal isn't able to walk so it was crawling and a man was swinging a club to it's head, so it perished and he could feed his family. The Statement was censored by the FCC

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don't take life to seriously nobody gets out alive

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What did the banana say to the apple? We're fruity.

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Q- Why did spongbob go to Detroit? A- He didn't, spongbob is not real. And even if he was, Detroit is not a very popular tourist attraction.

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What worse than a hurt puppy? Two hurt puppies.

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How many cops does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None, they just beat the night since its black

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How do u save a black person from drowning? Take ur foot off the back of there head

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Why did Prius driver go to jail? Because he ran over someone and then fled the scene of the crime (at 11 mph)

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Q:What's the difference between a lake? A: a tree, because motorcycles dont have doors... :) crf

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what did Cinderella say when she got to the ball? "Grggglgluglguggarglegerrrllggglge"

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what has 911 got in commen with most bank robberies? all r inside jobs

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Why couldn't the Joker browse the internet? He was using Compuserve.

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why did the magician stop doing magic ? he got hit by a bus and died

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Why did Jimmy's grandma never come home ? Her liver failed .

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This girl came up to me and said she recognized me from the vegetarian club. Her name was Jill.

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If bananas are purple, then what color are oranges? I am not going to tell you the answer because this joke has no significance whatsoever.

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Q:How many cavemans does it take to screw in a lightbulb A: None there was no electricity back then

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Whats green and gets you really high? A green airplane

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Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side... (other side as in the afterlife, for it committed suicide by crossing the road)

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What does and elephant and me have in common. Everything, I am an elephant.

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What's worst then leaving a public toilet when you just took a shit and the toilet is now clogged Realising that the maid was waiting for you to get out to clean the toilet...

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Why did Sally fall off the Empore State Building? Her mother threw a refrigerator at her. -BG

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Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

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Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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