What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

Q: I have a bed, but never sleep, I have a mouth, but never speak. What am I? A: Stephen Hawking

When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

Q Why did the chicken cross the road A Nobody knows why because nobody is psych

how much swag could a swagchuck chuck, if a swagchuck could chuck swag?

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at making jokes And your a jew

A: What does MC Hammer like? B: Big Butts. A: Can he lie? B: No.

2 bald men are standing on an oval, one turns to the other and says "leukemia."

roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

What one thing do the five members of Mystery Inc have in common? They were all raped and killed by REAL MONSTERS! One of the monsters happened to be Chuck Norris. He's a BEAST!

A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

Wanna hear a joke? no

Why'd the plane crash? Because the pilot was an orange.

Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's. Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's.

What did the chicken do? He crossed the road.

whats the diffrence 2 gay people and 1 gay person? A 1 person diffrence

what's a snake that has no legs a snake

why did the chicken eat chicken noodle soup? Because he killed his brother.

Where did the RICH black man go to? His home

Hoverboards are still not available, and it's already October 21, 2015...

KCLTLMBAIMWSSHTCAWGAHW

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had legs.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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