Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a Porsche? I don't have a Porsche in my basement.

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What did the fat man eat for breakfast? Nothing, he died of heart failure in the night.

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Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

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What is the difference between Steve Jobs and a PC? PC's are not dead.

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Friend: how obsessed are you with harry potter on a scale from 1-10 Me: 9 and 3/4

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What does a banana and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them are a police officer.

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Excuse me. Oh, would you mind hitting the 15th floor button for me? Thanks.

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What's yellow, black, and makes you laugh? A bus full of black people going off a cliff.

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What's better than winning the Special Olympics? ...Not being retarted.

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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autistic kids rock

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How many victims of the holocaust does it take to screw in a light bulb? Zero. They're all dead you sick fuck.

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Why do jews have large noses? Genetics.

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Why do thieves shower before undertaking a robbery? Probably part of their morning routine.

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Why did the elephant die? It was murdered by poachers for it's valuable ivory tusks.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

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what do u call a joke with no punchline? A non-harmful joke

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What do you call a black man driving a expensive sports car? A respectable member of society

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What's black, white, and red all over?? A penguin that just got hit by a truck and is now struggling to live.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like pussy Because it feels really good when I stick my penis inside her vaginal opening

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Does Anti-Joke have a purpose?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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