A man falls out of a boat. What happens next? Well, you would think he'd know how to swim, but due to his alzheimer's he didn't, so he drowned.

How often does the lesbian vampire group meet up? Never. Lesbians don't exist.

Yo mommas teeth are so yellow that.....I reccomend she see a dentist.

What doesn't kill you leaves you in a coma.

CNN has posted that the recent death of osama bin laden is comparable to decapitating a snake when really it is more akin to bisection of a worm.

So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

Your mothers so stupid she is retaking her college courses so she can get a better job and support her family.

You know what rhymes with sloth? Rape.

Where did the paralytic go for a vacation? No where he can't move.

a guy walks into a bar. he buys several drinks, ends up drunk, and crashes into a coffee shop with a goat in the backseat.

What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

Roses are red My parents are dead I am Batman.

Why did the piano explode? Beacause someone planted an explosive inside of it.

Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Why did the Mexican cross the border? To get into the USA for a better lifestyle.

Why can't Michel Jackson play chess? He's dead

What has two legs? Half a cat

Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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