Beans, beans, are good for your heart the more you eat the less hungry you are.

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Q:Why was the black guy carrying a gun A:He's a cop

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Hey, what do you call an absent-minded person? I'm sorry what did you say?

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how do you upset an obese cat? you put her in dog sweaters

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

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Roses are brown Violets are brown I should probably water My garden soon.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Q: What did one water bottle say to another water bottle? A: Nothing. Water bottles are inanimate objects and are thus unable to communicate.

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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Why did the kid lose his mom? She was shot.

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Q:What's the difference ethernet a corvette and a pile of dead baby's? A:I don't have a corvette in my garage

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A student asks a teacher: Sir, how much time would it take for me to do this quiz. Teacher says: From the second I give you this test to the second you hand it back to me.

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Rylan Clark

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle.

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Yo momma so fat, when she steps on the scales it reads 90kg

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Two muffins were in an oven. The first muffin says: 'It sure is hot in here!' The second muffin says: 'Why are they only cooking two muffins?'

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Why does the same anti-jokes pop up over and over again? Because people have no creativity.

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Q. What do you call a black pilot A. A pilot

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What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

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Why do seagulls live by the sea? Because they wouldn't be able to live anywhere else.

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People shouldnt make fun of holocaust jokes..my grandpa died cause of it! he fell off the gaurd tower

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Why doesn't Austin have sex? Because when his wife gets hot he puts dirt on her and hits her with a shovel

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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