Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

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Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

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Q: Whats white and fluffy? A: White fluff

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what smells like red paint, looks like red paint and is called red paint? A pear, i lied about everything i just said

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There were two penguin's sitting in a bathtub. The first penguin says to the second penguin, "Hey, pass the soap." And the second penguin says, "What do i look like, an alarm clock?"

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PATIENT: Doctor, doctor, I can't see my legs DOCTOR: That's because you're blind

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My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

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What's a fry cook's favorite day? Saturday. It's his day off.

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What is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite.

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what did the first fire hi-grin say to the second fire hi-grin nothing they can talk it what just really awkward.

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

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what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

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how do you get a one armed blonde out of a tree? it doesn't matter. she can't climb up a tree with only one arm.

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Yo Mama's so fat that she is at risk for diabetes

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I once was told that life is like a box of chocolates, but then realized that it wasn't

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Where do you go when you find a fork in the road? To the nearest restaurant.

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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Aids, Black People, Cancer, Death, Retarded, Drunk, Sex, Black People, Holocaust, Blackies, White People, BLACK

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why'd the chicken cross the road It didn't, it was safely placed inside a chook house

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Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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Q: Why did the boy fall off his bicycle? A: Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops