Ask me if i'm a tree. Q: Are you a tree? A: No.

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why was the little boy crying? he was at his mother's funeral.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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What do you call a guy walking into a bar Dave, because that's his name

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why did the black guy fall off a cliff? because he was a zombie

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How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

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hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

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What's worse than The Holocaust? Nothing, The Holocaust was a dark and scary time.

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"You just went and made a new dinosaur?" "And due to its well-developed core muscles the staff behind Jurassic World has called it - 'ABDOMINUS PEX'." "That's a stupid name."

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There was an old lady who swallowed a fly. But everything turned out alright, as the fly was dissolved by stomach acid.

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What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

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Why did the boy get his head slammed in a car door? Because his mother did not love him, and thought it was an appropiate action.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

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What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? The incident happened to substantiate stereotypes and condone racism.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy? Thousands of years of different evolutionary tracks resulting from different climates and available food sources.

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Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

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Q: What is brown and sticky and often found in the grass? A: A stick.

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A blonde, a brunette and a red head are having a discussion on current issues. The brunette says she would like to see improvements in the environment. The red head says she would like to see the economy prosper. The blonde says she has to take a poop.

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your mamas so fat she tried to hang herself but the rope broke.

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Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

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Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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