Roses are red, violets are blue, your face is so ugly it belongs in a zoo, but dont be sad, i forgot the rest, so you wont feel really bad. I need a rhyme, treasure chest.

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FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

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Roses are OK, Violets do the trick, C'mon and let me whip out my Dick.

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Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

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There was a black guy and a blonde crossing the street. They are not related.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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i once bought a timeshare, guess what happened? i'm broke

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Michael walked into a bar, The rest of the bar initially erupted with laughter until the his carer made everybody aware that Michael suffered from brittle bones and that he had actually fractured his hip after colliding with the bar. People then understood the gravity situation as the bartender immediately dialled the emergency services. Michael managed to recover physically from the accident but to this day he is still scarred from the laughter aimed at him the night of his accident and is too afraid to return to the bar again in fear of being mocked despite the misunderstanding of the situation.

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What is the most hardest math known to man kind? 1+1=?

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Why was it raining lobsters? Because they ran out of men. Why did the basketball player miss the net? Because he was hit by a lobster

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car. -Tag

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knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

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Why did the man punch NUGE in the face? Because he got angry that NUGE was being such a BA person and he was jealous of NUGE'S style and he just got dumped by his ugly as poop mom which was eating Anti Chicken.

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A pony goes to the doctor saying his throat hurts, the doctor sais "oh I know, your a little hoarse". The pony replies, no I'm not ass-hole I have strep throat.

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What do pebbles and Batman have in common. They're both pebbles. Except Batman.

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Whos better at Hide and go Seek, Anne Frank or Osama Bin Laden? -Why dont you tell me, they're both dead !

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How many dead babies can you fit inside Casey Anthony's trunk? Trick question. She didn't do it.

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what happened when steven hawking's date stood him up? he feel down

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

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Q.sam is 18 years old, why can't she get her licence? A.because Sam is a lost dog on the street

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Knock Knock Whos there? Rivkee Rivkee who? RIVKEEEEE FIRETRUCK!

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penis. nuff said.

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What do you call a deer with no eye? No eye deer ( get it, it's like the red, necked southern speaking states )

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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