Why did the kid fail the test? Because he was retarded.

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kennah campion... being nice

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Turtles

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass.

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does this look unsure to you?

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

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What do apples taste like? Apples.

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Roses are red Violets are red Everything is red If you are dead... Or a potato

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A person with OCD walked into a abr.

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What is worse but similar to Jenga? The September 11th attacks.

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what did the black man do for his family? nothing

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The number one killer of daredevil's is the ground.

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What do you call a group of asians? China.

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Wanna hear a joke? Womens' rights.

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Person 1: Knock knock. Person 2: Come in.

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What do you call a jew in a room full of gold? I highly improbable scenario in which the circumstances of how this "man" seemingly got into a gold room are unexplained.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? About 1,150 pounds.

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Jerry Rice is walking down the streets of San Francisco when all of a sudden he hears sirens coming from the next street down. He hurries down the road to see what's happening and sees a huge fire engulfing a 10 story building. And on the top floor, a lady is leaning out the window shouting to the firemen below. FIREMAN: Come on, lady, jump. We have the tarp here, we'll be able to catch you. LADY: No....I can't. My baby, my baby is up here. FIREMAN: Throw the baby down, we'll catch him. LADY: No, you'll miss. I can't leave my baby. Jerry sees this and steps forward. "Hey, I think I can help. Let me have the bullhorn." JERRY: Hey lady, I'm Jerry Rice, the wide receiver for the San Francisco 49er's. I'm the best wide receiver in the game, throw your baby down and I'll catch him, this is what I do for a living. Being a 49er fan herself, the lady recognizes Jerry and throws her baby down to him. Just as she throws it though, a huge gust of wind comes and takes the baby and starts to blow him off course. Jerry sees this and takes off after the baby. He hurdles the line closing off the area, fights through the crowd, dodges a couple of fire fighters, jumps over the car, and dives forward, just making a fingertip catch of the baby. The crowd around him goes wild and starts cheering his amazing catch. So Jerry jumps to his feet, raises his finger into the air, does a two step and then spikes the baby. If you have any dead baby jokes that are not here, I want to hear from you. Email me your dead baby jokes at skitzopathik@hotmail.com and I'll add them to this page.

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Knock Knock. F uck off.

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An rich man walks into a ghetto and buys something for 1 million dollars. what store was he in? he wasn't in a store,he got robbed

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Don't you hate it when you're reading a sentence and it doesn't end how you testicles. _._._

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what's the difference between babies and a trampoline? I take my shoes off to jump on a trampoline.

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what did one bum way to the other? we're shit out of luck

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Roses are red Voliets are blue I suck at making poems Refrigerator

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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