Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread. Why did the car crash? Because the driver was a loaf of bread. Why did the boat sink? Because the pirates attacked.

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why do asian people eat each other? because they are cannibles

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Q: Why don't blind people skydive? A:Because it is scary

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If Vegetarians eat vegetables, what do humanitarians eat? Probably both plant life, sea-based creatures, and land-based animals. However, depending on the personal preference of the person, they can also be a vegetarian or not. They could also be cannibals, but the literal definition of humanitarian would go against any cannibalistic traditions due to the fact that humanitarians help others for the benefit of humanity as a whole, eating people would go against such beliefs.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa Claus? Tiger Woods is an American professional golfer whose achievements to date rank him among the most successful golfers of all time and Santa Claus is a very jolly fellow who brings gifts to the homes of the good children during the late evening and overnight hours of Christmas Eve.

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no

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its shoulders.

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What rhymes with sloth? Cloth

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you know what sucks more than getting raped by a gorilla? getting raped by two gorillas.

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Whats big, hairy, and super long? My big toe you pervert.

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What did the giraffe say to the monkey? Nothing

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch!" Passersby notice the man is blind, which caused him not to notice the bar. He later died in the hospital from severe head trauma

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i like potatoes But only mashed baked are a little bad they arent tasty. I like food good because food bad can really hurt me

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Roses are rde, violets are bule, I am dyslexic, how about you?

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A farmer goes out to the coop to feed the chickens. They're all dead.

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Whats white and can't climb trees? A Fridge

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What do a comb and a guitar have in common? Neither of them can climb trees.

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The size of Idris Elba's penis

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knock knock you may come in

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Why did the mechanic sleep under a car? He had narcolepsy.

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Did you hear about the red ship and the blue ship that collided? Everyone on board died.

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What smells like curry and bombs? A dead Indian

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Obama

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What did the mute guy say to the deaf guy? *awkward silence* What did the deaf guy say to the mute guy? *Awkward silence....huh?*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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