Have you heard about the awesome farmer? He was outstanding in his field. -ymda

What do you call a Mexican flying a plane? A pilot

hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

Yo momma so fat, she's dead.

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve you kind here." The black man says, "Is it because I'm black?" The bartender replies, "Yes."

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

How do you fit a giraffe into a refrigerator? You cut it into pieces.

What is frowned upon no matter what country you're in? Sex on a plane.

What did the murderer do after killing the family? he went to jail.

what is the opposite of 2x +3x?

Whats funnier than a black man? A black president

What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

You know who can't stand to put up with my shit? Polio victims.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a killer

What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side Why did the duck cross the road? I don't know. I only know why the chicken crossed the road.

What's green and has wheels? grass... i lied about the wheels

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

How many members of Coldplay can you fit in a mini? 4, as there are 4 members of Coldplay.

What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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