Q: A giraffe fell in a hole and died. Which was taller the Lion or Giraffe? A: The Giraffe was before it died

thumb_up thumb_down -9

There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

hey jimmy! hey bob -.- jimmy, pls pls explain how to do this.. ): see your mom? yea... do it like we did her (OOOHHHH!)

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Suicide is never funny Unless it's a clown

thumb_up thumb_down -9

OMG I JUST FOUND THE GREATEST WEBSITE YOU SHOULD TOTALLY CHECK IT OUT OMG ITS http://anti-joke.com/submit

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Neither have I, nobody knew him.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Three men walk in to a bar, One ducked

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's big or small, can come in different colors, and would kill you if it was forced inside you? A refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats black and white and red all over? Genital Warts...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What worse than seeing a worm in your apple? Half a worm in your apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Your mother is so stupid that she had to study, a lot.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's black white and red all over? Steegers.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

thumb_up thumb_down -9

*The doctor walks in* Knock knock. Whos there? Doctor. Doctor Who?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

If you want to make the little things count, teach midgets maths!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why did the monkey fall from the tree? Because he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: which is easier to unload a truck of dead babies or a truck of alove babies? A: dead babies cause u can use a pitchfork

thumb_up thumb_down -9

some weirdo nerd was just convicted of a hit and run Just kidding. All he did was suffocate your dad with a whoopee cusion.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

scraggle is in you pillow case

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did God say to the man who just died? Nothing. God and Heaven something parents make up so kids will do the right thing.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops