Why did the black man grab and tie up the white woman? Because the white woman was a serial killer who has been on the FBI's most wanted list for killing children.

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A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says "What would you like to drink?" The cat says "Meow."

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Q: What did blue say to red? A: Let's make some purple

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Why did the policeman who's third wife just lost 20 pounds go to sleep? He was tired.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the baby monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the dead monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

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A man runs into a bar, sits down in a hurry and demands a beer from the bartender. The bartender looks at him wearily, but shrugs, pours him a beer and sets it down in front of him. The fat naked man then drinks the beer and leaves.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Well, neither has he.

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What do you call a group of black people in a lamboghini..... Unlikely

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

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Why did the chicken taunt the opposing team? To get to the other side.

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whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a tub of KFC

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Two peanuts were walking down the street, one was assaulted, the other was brutally raped.

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What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

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knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

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a man was beating his wife his wife asks him to stop he says no and continues beating her

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What's worse than 13 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 13 trees...

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A hasidic Rabbi and a member of Hezbollah enter a bar in a Jewish settlement. (No, of course they didn't.)

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Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

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When a fat lady walks by what do u think? R u fat or pregnant

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Why was the blonde on the train tracks? Because she was tied up by a madman on crack.

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops